a Page 8359 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
High School Kicker Booted Off Team for Acting Like, Being Girl
Let this be a lesson to all young girls out there: nothing positive can come from having Kathy Ireland as a role model. Kacy Stuart, prospective place kicker for McDonough, Georgia's New Creation Center high school, has been booted from the team for having the audacity to not be born a dude. Kacy ha...
Rudi Johnson Released From Bengals, Presumably For Good Behavior
You KNOW you're washed up when even the Bengals don't want you around anymore. Such is the case with Rudi Johnson, the tough Bengals running back whom you could pencil in for 1,300 yards and 12 touchdowns each season. At least that was the case before the franchise ran him into the ground. Last seas...
HUGH 3: Back In Training (Part 2)
We've enjoyed two big upsets today, and with the Clemson-Alabama game yet to come (and to be live blogged right here!), we can count on yet another Top 25 team eating the dirt before day's end. Most of you have weighed in on Virginia Tech, but there's still more football to be discussed. Get us your...
Afternoon Blogdome: Next Stop - Guest Spot on Entourage
• I've Got Ortega Tacos on Line 1...: Erin Andrews gets her own commercial. [Awful Announcing] • As Greek as Apple Pie: David Hasselhoff, student of history. [Deuce of Davenport] • Save a spot for Zach Randolph: Mad Lads Redux, starring the Memphis Grizzlies. [The Blowtorch] • Have they tried flamin...
Skip Holtz Will Eat Your Children In Broad Daylight
Playing the role of the disgruntled Asian kid was the East Carolina football program, who hosted Virginia Tech this afternoon and pillaged the game after the Pirates returned a blocked punt for a touchdown in the last two minutes to give Skip Holtz a 27-22 win over the Hokies and our first upset of...
Just When You Thought Gymnastics Could Not Get Any Creepier...
...here is sixteen year-old Olympic gold and silver medalist Shawn Johnson doing a commercial for tacos. If you listen closely in the background, you can hear a radio playing "Rock and Roll parts 1 & 2": ...
LSU Now 2-0 Against Teams That Recently Beat Michigan
The LSU Tigers have just finished up their tilit with Appalachian State, and it wasn't as close as some people expected. The Mountaineers, who of course beat Michigan at Michigan to kick off 2007, were trounced by the defending BCS champions (who beat Ohio State in the BCS title game, who had beaten...
Just Don't Follow Him to Any Golden Clubs
You've got to give the kid credit: he does not shy away from insurmountable expectations. After following in his father's legendary footsteps at Georgetown, Patrick Ewing Jr., son of NBA Hall of Famer (scans NBA almanac) Patrick Ewing, is now a New York Knick. It's already Junior's third team, and h...
HUGH 3: Return Of The King (Part 1)
Just a little tip when you're submitting your bits of brilliance to The Hugh Johnson on AOL Instant Messenger: Phallic references will almost always get you to the front of the line. Rips on Andre Ware and Pam Ward are always welcomed. Hey, whatever you're selling, we're buying. But now it's time to...
Whatever Happened to a Good Old Fashioned Headbutt?
Score one for the extraordinarily thin-skinned. A judge in Naples, Italy recently awarded 1500 Euro to a fan of the Napoli Football Club for "existential damages" he incurred while attending a match against Inter Milan. The cause of the damages? Banners. But not just any banners. Banners that made l...
Aye Carumba! Chad Johnson Changes Last Name To Ocho Cinco
So Bengals wideout Chad Johnson has legally changed his name to "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco." Which I guess is only slightly better than "Chad Javon GoldenPalace.com." Chad expects to play in the Bengals' season opener, despite suffering a dislocated shoulder in the preseason and creating more needlework...
For Your Viewing Pleasure: The First Step is Admitting You Have a Problem
What to watch while praying David Duchovny gets the help he needs... • In progress — Sport: U.S. Open Tennis Third Round Coverage [CBS] - Admit it: you need your Mary Carillo fix. • 12:00 — Sport: Syracuse at Northwestern [ESPN2] - Why should the ranked teams get all the love? • 3:00 — Sport: PGA To...
When Cubs Fans Fight Each Other, Everyone Else Wins
Cubs fans show the Phillies that Chicago can hold its own when it comes to stadium violence. Lookin' good, Chicago! [The Fightins]...
Crisis Averted
You can rest easy, casual male tennis fans still reeling from the Ivanovic upset (C.M.T.F.S.R.F.T.I.U.s): Elena Dementieva and Jelena Jankovic are through to the next round of the U.S. Open. Dementieva easily advanced in straight sets over Anne Keothavang of...England? Really? Seems kind of Dutch t...
Mets Solidify Position for Upcoming September Collapse
Forgive New York fans for celebrating just a bit harder than usual last night. After all, they are coming off a big win on the last Friday before the month-that-shall-not-be-named. Carlos Beltran's dramatic grand slam put his team up by three on the Marlins heading into the bottom of the ninth. The ...
Gustav Evacuees Prompt LSU To Bump Kickoff Up To 11 AM ET
For those of you that thought our first college football Saturday couldn't start soon enough, you're in luck. That is, unless you live near the Gulf Coast, in which case you're probably running for your life from Hurricane Gustav. The Class 3 hurricane is expected to hit the Gulf Coast sometime Mon...
Week In Review: You Know, Sarah Palin Was Once A Budding Hannah Storm
So can somebody out there dig up some footage of "presumptive" GOP VP Sarah Palin in her days as a fledgling sports reporter in Anchorage? Does that footage even exist or did it melt inside some igloo? This is, though, an interesting choice. Kind of takes the teary-eyed sparkle off of Obama's Victor...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you get home via the awesome power of beer ... • Boxing: Champion Matt Godfrey vs. Emmanuel Nwodo, in Uncasville, Conn. (9 p.m., ET). Title Wave engulfs Mohegan Sun Arena. [ESPN2] • College football: Temple at Army (7 p.m., ET) [ESPN Classic]; Southern Methodist at Rice (8 p.m., ...
You know she has that Scooby-Doo tongue.
You see I don't, I don't work with any exact boundaries of the law because I wasn't consulted when the god damn laws were made. No, instead nameless, faceless politicians, the so called protectors of the moral majority decide what is right and what is wrong. I mean come on. I govern my life around m...