a Page 8383 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Washington State QB Suspended Due To Suspicious "Bag Of Vomit"
Marshall Lobbestael was arrested after being found in a car parked in front of the Pullman police station, "allegedly passed out with a grocery bag of vomit between his legs." But it's all a frame up, see!...
Phoenix Mocks Amar'e Stoudemire's Pain
In light of Stoudemire's season-ending vision problems, the Suns probably regret launching their "See The Best You Can See" contest. First prize—free laser eye surgery! Second prize? A painful offseason of angst and regret. [Fanster]...
25 Random Things About Rick Reilly. Really.
Rick Reilly detests blogs, but loves Facebook apparently. Oh, and posting on his own blog (not a blog!) "Go Fish" where he publishes "occasional and random mind dumps from the brain of Rick Reilly."...
Randy Johnson Will Still Put A Ball In Your Neck If You Test Him
"In Johnson's first throwing session against Giants hitters on Saturday, his new teammates took a few too many pitches for his taste. Unabashedly incensed, Johnson grumbled afterward, 'Swing the stinking bat!' [NY TIMES]...
Maryland Would Like To Know If Duke Has Prince Albert In A Can
Jokesters on a Maryland message board posted the phone number of the hotel that Duke's hoops team was staying in last night and the results were a sad indictment of the current state of college pranks....
Dave Bing Wants To Be Mayor Of Detroit For Some Reason
Here's all you need to know about Dave Bing: He enters campaign rallies to the tune of "The Final Countdown," as an announcer yells: "Here's your favorite Detroit Piston, starting for the City of Detroit!"...
Pittsburgh Still Having Trouble With This No. 1 Thing
One week ago, Pittsburgh was an unstoppable juggernaut asserting their dominance by thrashing a previously unbeatable behemoth. Today, everyone is scratching their heads and saying, "What's wrong with those guys?"...
Knicks Finally Part Ways With Marbury
New York finally ended their feud with Stephon Marbury and sent him off into the night. Now that our long national nightmare is over, the question becomes—what are the Celtics getting themselves into?...
Soccer Fashion Shows Are Fabulous!
• Nice socks: The new Women's Professional Soccer League shows off their disappointingly tasteful uniforms. And what will Brandi Chastain be wearing? [The Beautiful Game]...
This Just In: Notre Dame Still On Bubble Despite Several Losses
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Scott Eyre Would Like To Borrow $20 Til Payday
This isn't funny, actually. Phillies reliever Scott Eyre, who signed a $2 million contract during the offseason, says he's down to his last 13 bucks. Don't hock the ring! [Big League Stew]...
Sorry, Guys. Marko Jaric Is Officially Off The Market
News of the nuptials between Memphis Grizzlies guard Marko Jaric and his Brazilian model-chick, Adriana Lima, spread like herpes from a beer pong tournament this morning. Never underestimate the power of a poorly groomed mustache....
Was Jim Calhoun Playing Fast And Loose With The Numbers?
Before Jim Calhoun's weekend press conference rant reaches YouTube meme proportions ("I'm forty! I'm a man!"), I think it's important that we look at the numbers he quoted and adjust them for inflation....
The Washington Capitals Do It For The Ladies
Hey, Girls! Do you and the gals love to gab about hockey at your slumber parties? Because the Capitals would love to see a few extra broads in the seats at their next home game....
The Yankees Are Ready For A-Rod To Alienate Fans This Spring
Joe Girardi: "I'm sure there's going to be some people that are upset. I'm sure there's going to be some people that support him, and there's going to be some people in between." [SI]...
Shaquille O'Neal Should Probably Have His Twitter Taken Away From Him
Shaq's Twittering accomplishments are more noteworthy than anything he or the Phoenix Suns have done so far this year. But with his latest Twitter stunt, The Big Aristo-Diesel is just asking for trouble....
How Do I Get On This Injured List?
• Yes, this is gratuitous: Tottenham Hotspur's Jermain Defoe is "rehabbing" his broken toe in the most healthy environment imaginable. I'm guessing that young lady is his doctor? [Unprofessional Foul]...
Two-Handed Bowler Will Save His Sport ... Or Destroy It
A rogue Australian criminal has adapted an ancient childhood secret that is completely revolutionizing professional bowling. All he had to do was ask—what if I used two hands?...
Andy Phillips And The Bizarre Porn Star Police Report
Former Yankee prospect Andy Phillips is considered one of the nicest family men in all of baseball by other writers and his peers. So why has an adult actress filed a police report against him?...
Should God Be Allowed In The High School Locker Room? (Not Until I Find My Pants)
East Brunswick High football coach Marcus Borden has a big problem, and it has nothing to do with his team's uniforms (although it should). Welcome to the nation's least-controversial subject: Prayer in school....