ac Page 579 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
CONCACAF's New World Cup Qualifying Format Is Bigger (And Dumber) Than Ever
CONCACAF’s convoluted World Cup qualifying format has always been tilted in favor the big boys at the expense of the teams in the confederation’s bottom tier, making it so the dozens of small nations had essentially no hope of ever playing in the World Cup. It’s understandable why CONCACAF sought to...
Harvard Fires Fencing Coach Over Shady Home Sale To Recruit's Wealthy Father
Harvard University has fired longtime fencing coach Peter Brand, who was involved in an admissions scandal having to do with the extremely suspect circumstances of the sale of his home to the family of a high school junior who was later admitted to Harvard as a fencing recruit....
It's Time To Get Unreasonably Excited About These Summer League Players
It’s the middle of July, the worst part of the year for sports. There’s exhibition baseball, MLS, and, uh, the World Series of Poker. But never fear: The doldrums of cucumber season aren’t just a dry spell that pushes you to go outside, travel, and reevaluate your life. It’s also a brief, wonderful...
Can The Thunder Trade Russell Westbrook?
The trade that brought Paul George to the Los Angeles Clippers also in effect brought Kawhi Leonard to the Clippers. That alone makes it one of the more momentous trades in recent NBA history, and the shockwaves haven’t even finished circling the globe yet....
Today's NFL Would Have Been Perfect For Doug Flutie
It’s been 14 years since he last played professional football, but Doug Flutie is suddenly relevant again. In the run-up to the draft, there was a big feature in the Washington Post, along with a 15-minute chat on The Rich Eisen Show. When I first reached out to ask about an interview, Flutie’s agen...
Commissioner For A Day: Gregg Popovich Should Be Wearing A Jersey
A great honor has been bestowed upon me: I am now the NBA Commissioner (for a day). With this great power comes great responsibility, and I have decided to use it to change something that has been wrong with the association since its inception: NBA coaches don’t wear uniforms....
Bleacher Report Deletes Tweet Containing God-Awful USWNT Graphic
Whenever an American team is in the championship of an international tournament of any kind, the ensuing victory or defeat can become a vital content farm for sports publications everywhere—present company included. With this in mind, Bleacher Report decided to tweet out this horrendous graphic that...
Ontario Minister Apologizes For Calling Senators Owner Eugene Melnyk "A Fucking Piece Of Shit" And "A Fucking Loser"
Ontario’s Tourism, Culture and Sport Minister Lisa MacLeod has apologized for accosting Senators owner Eugene Melnyk at a Rolling Stones concert last weekend about the team’s poor record in recent years. Melnyk recounted the event to the Ottawa Citizen:...
Kawhi Leonard Is The NBA's Executive Of The Year
Kawhi Leonard dynamited what remained of the premise of the Executive of the Year Award, and in doing so redefined the meaning of such staples as: the Friday night news dump; the value of holding onto non-human playing assets; and even patriotism. Now if that’s not a full day’s work for an adult-siz...
There Are Too Many Kinds Of Dashes
So you’ve got the hyphen. That’s the “-” guy. It joins words together. When you put “-ass” at the end of an adjective, you are using a hyphen. Also when you are separating out the syllables of a word, like for effect—“pre-pos-ter-ous”—that is also a hyphen job. The hyphen’s function in that case is ...
Diamondbacks Plunge Into The Depths Of The Seven Hells, Discover Agonizing New Way To Lose A Ballgame
If a walk-off win is exciting, and a walk-off walk is peculiar and charming, what is a walk-off walk, walk, walk, walk, walk? Perhaps something too grotesque to even imagine, let alone witness with your own eyes? Let’s find out....
After Nearly Two Years, Tottenham Are Finally Buying Players Again
Congratulations, Spurs fans: the club’s long transfer market nightmare is finally over. On Tuesday, Tottenham Hotspur announced not just one, but two transfers, the first by the club since signing right winger (both on the field and off of it) Lucas Moura back in January of 2018. And judging by the ...
The Warriors Will Retire The Jersey Of A Guy Who Dumped Them For Kyrie Irving
Having lost Kevin Durant in free agency to Kyrie Irving and the Brooklyn Nets, the Golden State Warriors announced Monday that Durant’s number-35 jersey will be effectively retired, for as long as Joe Lacob is in control of the team:...
Phil Kessel's Going To Arizona After A Messy Breakup With The Penguins
The Pittsburgh Penguins accomplished the inevitable. After Phil Kessel rejected a trade to the Minnesota Wild, the Pens found an agreeable new team for him, all the way out in Arizona. On Saturday, Pittsburgh traded Kessel, a 2021 fourth-round pick, and prospect Dane Birks to the Coyotes for Alex Ga...
Recently Promoted Spanish Soccer Club Renamed As Flat Earth FC
After earning promotion to the Spanish fourth flight division, the club formerly known as Mostoles Balompie got a complete rebrand from president Javi Poves and was renamed Flat Earth FC. Poves confirmed in a video statement that the change was intended to support one of the dumbest fringe beliefs:...
Darren Collison Abruptly Retires From NBA To Focus On Life As A Jehovah's Witness
After 10 seasons in the NBA, Darren Collison announced his retirement through an open letter to The Undefeated, citing his faith as the catalyst for his decision:...
NBA Set To Add Coach's Challenges To Review System Next Season
According to a memo reportedly sent Friday morning, the NBA will be experimenting with adding a coach’s challenge to its current replay review system. The trial will begin with summer league basketball next month, but the league “anticipates using the rule during the 2019-20 regular season as part o...
Dead Letters: "Earth Isn’t A Rotating Sphere, Get Used To It"
Subject: NZ Womens Soccer...
The Man Who Walked His Life Away
George Wilson stepped out into the medieval-walled prison yard and began to walk. He was 47 years old, beaten-down, and half-starved. His squat frame and stubby legs hardly suggested athletic excellence. But Wilson was well-known as a perambulator, a peregrinator, and a master of “leg-ology.” He was...
Grand Junction Humpback Chubs Game Postponed, Which Means The Grand Junction Humpback Chubs Will Play A Double-Header Today
The Grand Junction Humpback Chubs, a minor-league baseball team associated with the Colorado Rockies, had their game against the Ogden Raptors canceled last night due to an “outfield surface issue.” This was bad news for local Chubs fans who had purchased tickets to the game. Not only were they deni...