ac Page 685 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Russell Westbrook, Oh My God
Russell Westbrook’s season-long mania reached a furious, wailing-electric-guitar pitch in Tuesday night’s game against the Portland Trail Blazers. He scored a career-high 58 points, but it wasn’t enough to get Oklahoma City Thunder the win, an apt metaphor for their season....
Angry Man Cuts President Trump's Balls Off<em></em>
President Trump was getting hard to manage so his handlers went and lopped off his testicles....
Russell Westbrook Is The Goddamn MVP, Clowns!
San Antonio’s Kawhi Leonard had a fabulous game last night against the Houston Rockets. He scored 39 points—17 in the fourth quarter alone—on only 18 shots. He nailed the game-deciding three-pointer with 25 seconds left, then sprinted half the length of the floor to deliver the even more game-decidi...
Is Your Chicken Processed By Free Range Humans?
Yesterday, the Senate voted to repeal regulations that required federal contractors to accurately disclose all of their workplace safety violations. Because who would want that? ...
Tag Yourself
ACC mascots in Brooklyn for the conference tournament try, and fail, to entertain 13-month old Evelyn Robinson. Photo: Kathy Willens/AP Images....
The Time Reggie Jackson Got His Ass Whooped In The Clubhouse By A Teammate<em></em>
The following is excerpted from Dynastic, Bombastic, Fantastic: Reggie, Rollie, Catfish, and Charlie Finley’s Swingin’ A’s, by Jason Turbow. The book is available now on Amazon. Jason will be joining us later today to take your questions, and chat about the book....
Chris Stewart Punches Teammate, Corrects Situation By Punching Opponent
Hockey scrums can be a chaotic mess of limbs, so it’s understandable that the Wild’s Chris Stewart would accidentally biff teammate Zach Parise in the face during Sunday’s game. What’s better is that Stewart tried to play it off by smacking someone else....
Mariachi Band Greatly Improves Mariners Spring Training
Spring training always has stunts and shenanigans—like indulging a former quarterback’s fantasies so you can sell his shirsey for a couple of months—but the Seattle Mariners set the bar pretty high by hiring a mariachi band to tag along with center fielder Leonys Martin today....
Spring Training Is Good
One of my midlevel life regrets is that I’ve never gotten to Florida or Arizona for Spring Training, because it seems like it offers the things I like most about live baseball: Sitting outside in nice weather, eating and drinking, and just absorbing the entire sensory experience—the smells, the soun...
One Braised Pork Belly Taco To Rule Them All
We’ve been down this road, the pork belly road, before. Actually, we’ve been down many roads. Many roads converged in these woods, is what I’m saying. Good roads. Listen. Shut up. We are going to make gooey braised pork belly tacos, and we are going to find our way there via dead reckoning. Strap in...
Report: Kansas Punished Women's Basketball Player, Not Josh Jackson, For Role In Bar Argument
The Kansas City Star continues to highlight the male-first atmosphere that appears to embody Kansas athletics, reporting on Friday that women’s basketball player McKenzie Calvert was barred from Allen Fieldhouse for two days after her was car vandalized and she was accosted by a star member of the m...
Alabama's Reuben Foster Sent Home From NFL Combine After Trying "Do You Know Who I Am?" With Hospital Worker
Alabama’s Reuben Foster—the top linebacker in this year’s draft—has been sent home from the NFL combine after getting in a “heated altercation” with a hospital worker, according to ESPN....
Leonard Fournette: I Didn't Get Fat, That Was Just Water Weight
Former LSU running back Leonard Fournette weighed in at 240 pounds at this year’s NFL combine, making him the heaviest running back in the draft class. Evaluators were apparently expecting Fournette to weigh a little less, but he eased their minds at a post-weigh-in press conference....
Columnist Suggests Adrian Peterson Hit His Kid Because He Might Be Descended From Slaves<em></em>
Pete Dougherty of the Green Bay Press-Gazette wrote a column this evening for USA Today’s Wisconsin Network urging the Packers to sign free agent running back Adrian Peterson. He makes the case that Peterson still has plenty of productive football ahead of him, and writes off Peterson having whipped...
Taj Gibson Drills Hail Mary Buzzer-Beater At The Half
Oklahoma City took a 60-57 lead over Portland into the half after Taj Gibson intercepted a baseball pass from Pat Connaughton and heaved up his own Aaron Rodgers-style hail mary that delivered at the other end. Incredible!...
Derrick Rose Sounds Incredibly Enthused About The Return of The Triangle Offense
The triangle offense is back in New York City! This is what will save the moribund Knicks’ season, some good old fashioned archaic basketball. Have you caught the fever? Derrick Rose has:...
The Idiot Behind "Kirby's Law" Is Giving Us The Latest Stupid Bill Out Of Georgia
It took me just one semester of college covering the Florida legislature as a student to realize how little state lawmakers give a shit about public universities as institutions of higher learning. Sure, they give out money, but it’s largely in the extension of their own interests. In Florida, the G...
Antoine Griezmann Follows Up Teammate's Near-Miss Wondergoal With Wondergoal Of His Own
Just when it looked like Atlético Madrid would come away empty handed after a deep blast from full back Filipe Luís came crashing off the woodwork, Antoine Griezmann responded almost immediately with an even more audacious hit of his own that sailed over the keeper’s head and into the back of the ne...
The Pistons Need To Rely On Their Most Unlikely Players In Order To Win<em></em>
Kentavious Caldwell-Pope was never supposed to be Detroit’s savior....
Celebrity Democrats Fuck Off
We have just witnessed the incredible spectacle of a vile right-wing celebrity being elected President of the United States. There is a right lesson—and a wrong one!—for Democrats to take from this. ...