ac Page 805 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Russell Westbrook Is Back To Soaring Past Hapless Defenders To Dunk
After missing Sunday's game against the Lakers because of surgery to repair a fractured zygomatic arch bone, Russell Westbrook has returned with a vengeance, and a mask! Both were on display as he split two Philadelphia defenders to throw down a monster two-handed jam. It is only 18 minutes into the...

TSN Will No Longer Air Tweets On Live Broadcasts
TSN sure screwed up when they broadcast a joke tweet saying that Joffrey Lupul was sleeping with Maple Leaf teammate Dion Phaneuf's wife, Elisha Cuthbert, but they've come up with a foolproof plan to prevent this type of situation from ever occurring again: they're going to stop airing "public" tw...

Make Your Bed. Make Your Bed? Make Your Bed!
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....


Which One Of You Assholes Stole Serge Ibaka's Water?????
Was it you, Kevin Durant? Was it? Don't lie!...

J.J. Watt Is A Goddamn Lying Clownfraud
"It's really minimalistic," he said. "There's no frills ... It's just an empty space and a log cabin and snow." You pictured a hovel on the taiga. A lean-to. Wind whistling between the rough-hewn and bark-clad logs. J.J. Watt waking, abundantly and ruggedly bearded, staggering outside in the pre...

Joffrey Lupul Is Now Threatening To Fight People On Instagram
Leafs winger Joffrey Lupul seems to be taking this "threaten to sue anyone who has ever implied that he slept with Dion Phaneuf's wife" strategy very seriously. After obtaining legal representation with Phaneuf and Phaneuf's wife, actress Elisha Cuthbert, and threatening to sue TSN for accidentally ...

Erik Spoelstra's Karaoke Strategy: Just Smile And Dance A Lot
Former Heat swingman Shane Battier hosted his annual charity karaoke event last night, which means it's time for us to once again laugh at members of the Heat organization trying and mostly failing to sing pop songs. So far, the best performance to surface from the evening is Erik Spoelstra, joi...

Report: Man Who Told On Jackie Robinson West Arrested For Assault
The man whose whistleblowing—or snitching, depending upon your perspective—led to the Jackie Robinson West Little League team losing their national title has been arrested for assault, DNAInfo reports. Chris Janes is alleged to have drunkenly tried to enter a neighbor's home at 1 a.m. Tuesday, a...

NRA Secretly Backs Group Aiming To Save Elephants Now, Kill Them Later
A couple of weeks ago, a group called the Elephant Protection Association (EPA) sent an email to a Maryland woman with elephant-hugging tendencies after she'd registered for membership online. There was an important measure coming before the General Assembly in Annapolis, HB713, which would restr...

Lupul, Phaneuf, And Elisha Cuthbert Want An Apology And Cash From TSN
Maple Leafs players Joffrey Lupul and Dion Phaneuf, along with Phaneuf's wife, actress Elisha Cuthbert, have retained a law firm and are threatening a defamation lawsuit against TSN for accidentally airing a joke tweet claiming Lupul is sleeping with Cuthbert. (Which he totally isn't, lawyers.) Th...

Rae Sremmurd Are Human Adderall
If you're like me, you didn't immediately get Rae Sremmurd, because you have a 401k and your hangovers are starting to get worse and you're beginning to feel the oppressiveness of your own mortality. But the pop-rap duo is great and fun—likely created by producer Mike Will Made It in a chemistry-lab...

Things That Are The Worst, Ranked
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering the dress, pantsless driving, bare feet, and more....

Arkansas Player Arrested For DWI; Bret Bielema Limits His Car Use
After police arrested Arkansas defensive lineman Tevin Beanum for a DWI early Sunday morning, Razorbacks head coach Bret Bielema didn't completely boot Beanum from the team, but he did hand out an appropriate punishment: Beanum can't use his car except for classes or practice....

The Wizards' Celebration Of Black History Month Is A Little Tone-Deaf
The Washington Wizards created a pop-up website to celebrate Black History Month. The site is full of pictures of various members of the Wizards organization spliced next to a picture of a historical black figure that inspires them, and a quote from each person featured. It's mostly a harmless idea,...


Let's Appreciate Danny Espinosa's Big, Beautiful Mustache
Oh, hey. I'm Nationals second baseman Danny Espinosa, and I have a ridiculous mustache now. This is how I look, on purpose....

Syracuse Lacrosse Executed The Perfect Hidden-Ball Trick
Keep your eye on the ball, if you can....

Blackhawks Deny Rumors Of Locker-Room Strife
It's been a very weird week for the Blackhawks, which kicked off with a broken collarbone for Patrick Kane that will see their leading scorer out through May, closed with a pair of significant "we're going for it" trades, and in between saw some thinly sourced rumors take on a life of their own. It'...