acl Page 8 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bayern Munich Player Passes Ball To Advertisement

Things move fast in the wild world of sport. Sometimes you just react to a flash of color. Bayern Munich’s Thiago Alcántara saw a man in red streaking down the pitch, thought to himself “I’m wearing red,” and passed him the ball....

Hmmm, Yes, I Am Extremely Into This Game In Which 11,000 Penguins War With 4,000 Santas

Here we have a legitimately captivating video in which the makers of Epic Battle Simulator (video games are good) demonstrate what their game is capable of. This video is eight minutes long, and I watched the whole damn thing:...

Big Strong Santa Will Get You Feeling Festive

You wanna see a guy who looks like Santa Claus deadlift 650 pounds while some EDM-inflected Christmas music plays in the background? Hell yeah you do!...

New Baseball Team Picks A Name And I Learn About A Scary New Animal

A team from Fond du Lac, Wisc., will field a team in the Northwoods League, a collegiate summer baseball league, beginning next year. Today they announced the team name. It’s that....

Report: Santa Clara Threatens To Take Over 49ers' Stadium For Misuse Of Taxpayer Dollars

The San Francisco 49ers secured a new stadium in Santa Clara on the condition that taxpayer dollars not be spent on NFL games or private events. But two years after Levi’s stadium opened, Santa Clara mayor Lisa Gillmor has concerns that the city is not being properly reimbursed for expenditures and...

Tim Tebow Closer To Sainthood After Healing Sick Fan For Second Confirmed Miracle [Update]

Let me tell you the story of Saint Timothy of Gainesville....

Santa Clara Cops Say Colin Kaepernick Hurt Their Feelings, Threaten To Quit Working Games

Santa Clara police are threatening to cease serving and protecting the 49ers unless the team takes action against Colin Kaepernick, according to a letter sent by police union officials....

The Chiefs Will Fight The NFL On Tampering Penalties

The Kansas City Chiefs have been hit by the NFL with a raft of penalties for illegally tampering with Jeremy Maclin during 2015's “legal tampering” period, and, frankly, it’s pretty insane. The penalties are harsher than any previously imposed, and the violation was one that undoubtedly happens doze...

PGA Tour Golfer Jason Bohn Survives Heart Attack And Major Arterial Blockage

Jason Bohn left this weekend’s Honda Classic on Friday and headed to a hospital after reporting chest pains to the tournament’s medical staff. He was taken to a Palm Beach hospital in an ambulance shortly after finishing his round on Friday. According to the Golf Channel’s Tim Rosaforte, “had it hap...

Santa Clara Mayor Jamie Matthews announced his retirement Monday, one day after the Super Bowl at the 49ers’ stadium. Matthews didn’t mention a particular reason for leaving in the middle of his term. Know anything? Drop a line at [email protected]. [SF Gate]...

Jeremy Maclin And J.J. Watt Both Leave Game With Injuries On The Same Play

J.J. Watt, who’d just spent a little bit on the sideline right before this play nursing a groin injury, had to stop his rush halfway through due to a flare up. Right after he went down, Chiefs lineman Eric Fisher got a cheap shot in on the neck of a defenseless Watt. Watt went into the locker room, ...

The Chiefs Should Terrify The AFC

The AFC’s elite teams are all limping toward the finish line. The Bengals are relying on a backup quarterback who’s most famous for having a girlfriend who aroused Brent Musberger, and you couldn’t describe the Broncos’ new starter as much else besides ‘Tall’ (and, I suppose, ‘Injured’ and maybe ‘Va...

Bills Fan Slams Santa Through A Table

It’s Christmastime, and that means families gather together, the spirit of giving moves us, and Santa Claus travels about, giving presents to children who’ve behaved all year. ...

Our Roomba Vacuumed The House With Dog Shit

Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. Are you dirty? Email her....

Here's What To Do When You Barf In The Car

My guest this week on the official Ask a Clean Person podcast is Freddy Hernandez, a/k/a Tavarish, of Jalopnik fame, who joined me in the studio to lend his expertise to more of the messes you all are making of your cars. And boy, are you ever making some messes!...

Cleancast: Which Vacuum Should I Buy?

On this episode of the official Ask a Clean Person podcast, Liam McCabe of the Sweethome joined me to talk about vacuum cleaners—including and especially what type of vacuums people with specific issues like pet-hair control, allergy prevention, or tiny budgets should look for when making their purc...

You Can Totally Use Soap On A Cast-Iron Pan

My guest this week on the official Ask a Clean Person podcast is Daniel Gritzer, the culinary director at Serious Eats, who joined me to share the vast amount of knowledge he’s collected over the years about caring for cast-iron cookware. New, old, seasoned, unseasoned, rusted, you name it—Daniel ca...

How To Clean A Roach-Infested Coffee Maker

Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She’ll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....

The Packers Were Mad At Their Tablets And Each Other

The Packers have lost two games in a row with Aaron Rodgers starting at quarterback, which hasn’t happened since 2010. Green Bay was contained against the Broncos last Sunday, and yesterday, the Panthers held on for a 37-29 win. Multiple players showed their frustrations on the sideline....

Miami's Miracle Walk-Off Kick Return, As Called By Hurricanes Radio Announcers

Another week, another shocking play the likes of which no one has ever seen; tonight, Duke fell victim to the whims of fate, and once again we’re here to bring you the action as called by home announcers....