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The Hater's Guide To Other Parents
I am not the greatest parent in the world. In fact, I wrote an entire book coming out today that indisputably proves that statement. I have been arrested. I have yelled at my children. I have experimented with odd forms of corporal punishment. And I have conspired with my children to commit petty mi...

Kendrick Perkins Had A Historically Bad Playoff Run
If you want to find the most obvious reason that the Oklahoma City Thunder were unable to advance past the second round of the playoffs, your search will end with the words "Russell Westbrook." But Westbrook's absence wasn't the only thing holding the Thunder back. They also had a much bigger proble...

Deadspin Up All Night: The Dog Wants Her Bones
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Sean will be here in a bit to keep you entertained through the evening....

You're Fucked, But You're Free: A Message To The Class Of 2013
It's May, which means it's time once again for actors and writers and politicians and whatever Thomas Friedman is to hit the graduation circuit and hold senior classes hostage for hours and hours in 85-degree heat. These grad speeches are little more than TED talks in funny hats. Trust me: One day...


Here's A Sad Picture Of James Dolan Watching Last Night's Game
So the picture's a little out of focus, but that just adds to the hilarity. Look at how sad he is! Just sittin' there, mid-facepalm, watching his team get torched by the Pacers while struggling to digest whatever used to be on that sad, empty plate. For once, I think Knicks fans can identify with ho...

The Summer Game
Nice piece by Adam Sobsey over at the Paris Review on what promises to be a great documentary: Bull City Summer....

Ilya Bryzgalov Talks Philly Ghettos, Welfare Queens, And Joseph Stalin
Russian media are notorious for twisting words, and occasionally making shit up. Google Translate is far from perfect. Still, this Ilya Bryzgalov interview gets real fucking strange even before he talks about wanting to hang out with Stalin....

The Nats Are Still Pretending Bryce Harper Doesn't Have A Concussion
After Bryce Harper ran full-speed into the Dodger Stadium wall on Monday, he "had no idea where he was." He was nauseous all day yesterday, and couldn't play. He's expected to miss tonight's game as well. But he's totally fine, the Nationals would like to assure everyone. Just a little sore....

Tracy McGrady Blocked Two Shots, And The Spurs Won, Too
So, the San Antonio Spurs smacked the Golden State Warriors 109-91. The Spurs are up 3-2, and have a chance to close out the most exciting series of the NBA Conference semifinals when they travel to Golden State on Thursday. Fine. Great. That's not why we're writing this....

College Hockey Coach Accused Of Slashing Player With Hockey Stick
Dave Shyiak, former coach of the University of Alaska-Anchorage Seawolves, has been accused of violently striking a player with a hockey stick during a 2011 practice, the Anchorage Daily News reports. A former player, Mickey Spencer, alleged in a May 1 letter that Shyiak struck another player, Nick ...

A New Orleans Street Fight, Graded By An Unimpressed Pro Wrestler
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: "New Orleans Street Fight @FrankieWatts715." Tonight's commentator: Heartland Wrestling Association Wrestler Jock "the Appalachian Outlaw" Samson. (Coming next week: Own...

Deadspin Up All Night: At The Dark End Of The Street
Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Greg will be around in a little bit. Enjoy Steph Curry tonight. ...

Lawsuit Says LeSean McCoy Assaulted And Ditched Woman On Party Bus
Eagles running back LeSean McCoy is being sued by a woman who claims McCoy and his bodyguard assaulted her on a party bus before abandoning her somewhere along the New Jersey Turnpike last December....

Who Would Be Our Go-To Villain If Hitler Had Never Existed?
Are you gonna be in Austin, Texas, next Monday? Oh well, do I have a treat for you: ME, READING OUT LOUD. It's just like a lecture, only I never look up. Tell me you aren't enthused. You could even bring a date and then watch her storm out of the bookstore 10 minutes later! The reading starts at 7 p...

The Florida Panthers Want Broward County To Buy Them A New Scoreboard
The Panthers will appear before the Broward County Commission today, to argue that that the county should spring for $4.2 million to build a new scoreboard. As their neighbors to the south, the Marlins and Dolphins, struggle to win over increasingly skeptical taxpayers, maybe $4.2 million is a littl...

Donovan McNabb Will Retire As An Eagle
McNabb, the greatest QB the franchise has ever known, will sign a one-day contract to retire as an Eagle at a ceremony in Week 3. In town that week? The Chiefs, and McNabb's longtime coach Andy Reid....

This Is The New Vikings Stadium
Last night, at a formal presentation at Minneapolis's Guthrie Theater, the Vikings released the first renderings of their new billion-dollar stadium....