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Deadspin Up All Night: Pay No Attention To These Savages
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Enjoy the playoff basketball tonight. And the NFL draft, I guess. ...

OK, The NFL Draft Has Gone Too Far
This is currently happening outside Radio City Music Hall, where the NFL draft will be starting shortly. These guys are carrying stupid football hats in glass cases like each one of them is the fucking Hope Diamond, and that is just so stupid. Just look at them, smugly posing for photos and walking ...

Yes, Troy Tulowitzki Did Have A Mullet When He Was An Adorable Child
We've always been big fans Troy Tulowitzki's once-prodigious mullet (bring it back, Troy!), but until today, we had no idea that it was also an homage to Tulo's younger days. Thanks to the Colorado Rockies' Instagram account, though, we can now enjoy this picture of a mulleted, 8-year-old version of...

This Hockey Brawl Featured Four Goalies Fighting Each Other
If a goalie fight is hockey's Holy Grail, this is drinking unicorn blood out of the Holy Grail while doing 90 in a Camaro Z28....

Norwegian Soccer Club Pissed Because This Road Was Built On Its Pitch
Well, this creates a bit of a problem, no? Ny Krohnborg IL, a regional side that plays in Norway, came back from the offseason to find this sitting along one of the goal lines on its pitch. Surprise!...

Prankster Gets NFL Draft Attendees To Lie About Liking Fake Players
Jimmy Kimmel set the standard for shaming clueless liars when he sent a reporter to Coachella to ask people to talk about completely made-up bands, but this sports-themed version of the same prank comes mighty close to matching its ingenuity. ...

Ingenious Prank Sends Parents Into Weed Panic
Comedian Nathan Fielder came up with a wonderful idea yesterday. He instructed his Twitter followers to text "got 2 grams for $20" to their parents, immediately follow up with "Sorry ignore that txt. Not for you," and then tweet a screenshot of the ensuing conversation. The results were, as you mig...

Deadspin Up All Night: Pick Up Your Microphones
Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. You're all great. Have a lovely evening....

Feedbag: Why Does My Cooking Suck? Your Questions, Answered
Welcome to the Feedbag, where all the dumb questions about food, drink, cooking, eating, and accidental finger removal you've been embarrassed to ask can finally receive the berating they goddamn deserve. Also: answers. Send all your even-vaguely-food-related questions to [email protected]....

Here's A Penguin Sitting In Rays Manager Joe Maddon's Chair
Shut up, don't ask questions. It doesn't matter why the Rays had a penguin running around in their clubhouse today. All that matters is that penguins are adorable....

The Chargers' Doctor Is A Drunk Quack. Why Haven't They Fired Him?
The California Medical Board believes that David Chao should lose his medical license. Nearly two dozen former patients who have sued him since 1998—alleging in all the medical superfecta of malpractice, personal injury, negligence, and fraud—would agree. Dissenting: the NFL and the San Diego Charge...

Grantland just dropped nearly 20,000 words from the great Brian Phillips on the Iditarod. If we said we had read it and it was great we would be lying, because reading it will take a couple hundred lunch breaks or so, but we can probably bet that it is great. The layout itself is beautiful. [Grantla...

A.J. "Fuckin' Shit" Clemente Gets Pep Talk From News Legend Tom Brokaw
A.J. Clemente, whose first day at the anchor desk of Bismarck NBC affiliate KFYR became his last after being fired for opening the show with "Fuckin' Shit," made the rounds at NBC this morning and even earned a pep talk from one one of the biggest figures in broadcast news: Tom Brokaw....

Brad Johnson Isn't Doing So Hot These Days
Broken knees, broken ankles, cracked vertebrae, nerve damage, the works. Brad Johnson is proof-positive you don't need brain trauma to suffer from your NFL career for the rest of your life....

Tuesday Night Fights: A Referendum On Styles
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: "Ustawka, walka na ulicy" or Squidy vs. Paul. Tonight's commentator: Barry Petchesky. (Coming next week: a Deadspin Hall of Famer on a Hall of Fame Eastern European bat...

Deadspin Up All Night: I Got The Juice
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. You have yourself a wonderful Tuesday night....

MLB Should Probably Stop Scheduling April Games At Coors Field
Last week's four-game Mets-Rockies series featured two snow-outs, one of which was played as part of a supremely depressing doubleheader—a doubleheader, for that matter, which started two hours late because of an undermanned, overworked snow-clearing crew. The other game will probably be made up in ...

Delaware Police Finally Track Down Man Wanted For 16 Naked Incidents
"Naked incidents" sounds pretty weird, right? And 16 of them seems like kind of a lot, yes? Questions for another day, I'm afraid. We've got more important things to talk about....
