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Delmon Young Can Earn $600,000 In Bonus Money By Not Being A Fat Mess
On Tuesday, the Philadelphia Phillies signed Delmon Young, noted anti-semite and worst player to ever win the ALCS MVP, to a one-year, $750,000 contract. Today, we learned that Young's contract has one very peculiar stipulation. From the AP:...

Scarves Are Bullshit
It's cold outside today, unless you're one of those insufferable L.A. people who are like IT'S SUNNY AND 70 HERE IN DOUCHE HEAVEN, BABY! Anyway, I had to venture out into the WINDSWEPT MOONSCAPE today, and it was imperative to cover both my neck and the lower half of my face. This is the Scarf Zone,...

"I Do Not Fit The Mold You Would Expect": Meet The Pharmacist, The FedEx Courier, And Other Dreamers Who Applied To Coach Wisconsin Football
On Dec. 4, the University of Wisconsin's football coach, Bret Bielema, bolted for Arkansas. The school advertised the job opening on its human resources website, allowing an assortment of dreamers to submit their applications online. A bachelor's degree was required; "5 years of successful college f...

What Was Manti Thinking? What's The Future Of Doping? The Amazing Kreskin Is Here To Read Minds And Take Questions
He's a mentalist. He reads thoughts. He makes predictions (though don't ask him to pick the winners of sporting events). He's the Amazing Kreskin, and he's been doing this since long before your parents used to watch him occasionally clown around with Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show. He's down in ...
![Tuesday Night Fights: Nudity So Horrific, Drew Magary Couldn't Make It All The Way Through This One [Incredibly NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Tuesday Night Fights: Nudity So Horrific, Drew Magary Couldn't Make It All The Way Through This One [Incredibly NSFW]
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: "Street Fight - Big Mom." Tonight's commentator: Drew Magary returns. (Coming next week: TBD, as the seminal fight video of the week has not yet presented itself.)...

Deadspin Up All Night: Can't Stop The Night
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Stick around for some stuff to keep you warm on this cold winter night....

Shawn Kemp Feels Bad For Sacramento Losing The Kings, But Says Seattle Has Better Fans
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: The Reign Man says business is business....

Bradford City Beats Aston Villa, Is First Fourth-Division Team To Reach League Cup Final Since 1962
League Two side Bradford City cruised to a 3-1 win in its home match of the League Cup semifinal tie against Aston Villa two weeks ago, but most observers expected the Claret and Blue to put up, at the very least, a 2-0 win in today's Villa Park rematch to advance to the League Cup final. After al...

New Study Reveals That CTE May Be Detectable In Living Patients
A new study, published by researchers at UCLA in the American Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry, shows evidence that Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE) can be detected in living patients via positron emission tomography (PET) scans. CTE is a particular type of brain damage that causes depression,...

The Silverdome Has Been Abandoned To The Elements
The Silverdome hasn't hosted the Lions since 2001. The city of Pontiac auctioned it off in 2009 to the highest bidder. The highest bid was $550,000. "It was a bit surprising," the new owner said. "There were really very few bids."...

OK, What The Hell Is Going On With Roberto Luongo?
Not two years ago, Roberto Luongo was one of the best goaltenders in the game. He was, if not beloved by Vancouver, at least embraced as the man most responsible for making the Canucks a Cup contender. But something weird happened. He fell out of favor, even before the Canucks fell in a Game 7. This...

J.R. Smith Reminds Kris Humphries That Kanye West Is Now Kim Kardashian's Sperm Donor, Just In Case He Forgot
The Nets beat the Knicks 88-85 tonight, but we're not here for that. We're here to talk about Poor Kris Humphries. The guy can't even talk shit after a win without getting the whole fake-marriage-to-a-reality-show-fame-whore deal thrown in his face....

Deadspin Up All Night: Grown Up
Thank you for your continued support of dogspin.co, from all the smarmy idiots in the building. We can't wait to see where we're headed next. Chat down there....

Chip Kelly Says The Eagles Winning A Super Bowl "Would Be Like 1,000 Wing Bowls"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: With even more nudity and puking....
![Wes Welker's Wife Took To Facebook To Say Some Unkind Things About Ray Lewis [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18c7tg03i5q6yjpg.jpg)
Wes Welker's Wife Took To Facebook To Say Some Unkind Things About Ray Lewis [Update]
After watching her husband's team lose the AFC Championship game, Anna Burns Welker, wife of Patriots wide receiver Wes Welker, decided that it would be a good idea to comment on the game via her Facebook page. Anna Welker began her message by offering support to her husband and his team, which is ...

Dead Letters: All The Hate Mail We've Received Since Publishing Our Manti Te'o Story
Subject: With regards to the Te’o story......

How The Song “Seven Nation Army” Conquered The Sports World
This post was originally published on January 13, 2012....

Roundup: What You Missed The Weekend Jim Harbaugh Lost His Mind
Jim Harbaugh's Failed Challenge Freakout Is Even Better In Extreme Slow Motion | Jim Harbaugh is an absolute lunatic. That's really all there is to say. Read »...

Canadian Figure Skaters Are A Menace
So, you're minding your business (or pleasure) in your tidy Delta Meadowvale hotel room in Mississauga and then, bam! Chaos. Figure skaters everywhere. One man had his cheek cut. He was OK and didn't need any medical attention, but I mean come on. The police were even called....
