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Scott Van Pelt Is The Coolest Guy In This Photo
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Not Feeling Minnesota: Rubio May Stay In Europe, Says Father
My Spanish is a little rusty, but I do believe this translates to, "Get us the fuck out of Minneapolis, Donnie Walsh."...

NBA Draft Live Blog
Welcome to the party. With the lottery portion of the draft nearly complete I'll be taking you the rest of the way in the live blog....

Young Money Is A Buck
10. Brandon Jennings, Compton via Italy. Forget all the hating, Jennings can play. The Bucks get him at a great spot, although they don't have a whole lot of talent surrounding him....

DeMar Derozan Heads North of the Border, Up Canada Way
9. Toronto Raptors: DeMar Derozan, USC I assume Skeets is happy, because his team landed one of the draft's most enticing players. Derozan can fly and he'll probably put some asses in the seats....

Knicks Settle For Jordan Hill, Knicks Fans Boo
8. New York Knicks: Jordan Hill, Arizona But hey, screw Knicks fans, right? Hill has the potential to develop into a stud, and with David Lee's future with the team in question this fills one of their needs....

The Warriors Take Stephen Curry, Knicks Fans Boo
7. Golden State Warriors: Stephen Curry, Davidson And to be honest, the Warriors probably just did the Knicks a favor....

Jonny Flynn Is All About the 'Mid Coast'
6. Minnesota Timberwolves: Jonny Flynn, Syracuse. Minnesota is stocking up on point guards, and why not? Rubio isn't ready to come in and lead the team for 30 minutes a night, but that's Flynn's specialty....

Rubio Is A Wolf
5. Minnesota Timberwolves: Ricky Rubio, SpainPeople are going to love Ricky Rubio, even if he is stuck in Minnesota. Rubio may be small, and he'll probably be invisible defensively, but he's going to be a lot of fun to watch....

The Kings Get It Right
4. Sacramento Kings: Tyreke Evans, Memphis. A great pick for the Kings who went with the best player available....

The Thunder Go With Harden
3. Oklahoma City Thunder: James Harden, Arizona State. Stuart Scott is feeling the bow tie. Oh, and James Harden is a pretty good fit for the Thunder. He is an efficient offensive player and his game is NBA ready....

Thabeet Takes His Balls to Memphis
2. Memphis Grizzles Hasheem Thabeet, UConn It's just the second pick of the draft and David Stern's voice is already cracking. It's his Bar Mitzvah all over again! As for Thabeet, he looks tall and shiny....

Blake Griffin Is A Clipper
1. Los Angeles Clippers: Blake Griffin, Oklahoma. Okay, so the pick hasn't been announced yet, but it's not exactly a secret....

Michael Jackson Dies. Chad Johnson Says It's "Just As Sad As 9/11."
The LA Times is saying King of Pop Michael Jackson died today after suffering a heart attack. He was 50. Because this is a sports blog, here's a video, via NESW Sports, of Jackson playing one-on-one with Michael Jordan. RIP....

Please Join KOGOD This Evening For NBA Draft Insanity
Deadspin's official draftnik for 2009 will be "KOGOD" aka "Unsilent Majority" aka "Baby KOGODINO." He will live blog until he falls asleep in a comfy chair covered in peanut shells and Velveeta. Have fun with him. [KSK]...

Geovany Soto Likes That Weed
Pictured, Left to Right: Chicago Cubs catcher Geovany Soto and the sweet, sticky herb that he loves to burn and inhale into his lungs, an activity he somehow got caught doing around the time of the World Baseball Classic....

Meet The Next Generation Of C-Team NFL Broadcasters
Have you ever watched a sixth-string announcing team stumble their way through another awful NFL game,and think, "Do they have some kind of assembly line that churns out these lousy ex-football player analysts?" Well, guess what? They do!...

Jim Brown: All-American, Gaylord
Your Deadcast guest this week is Hall of Famer Jim Brown (listen here). And holy shit, is that man intimidating. Except when talking about rollerskating around Venice Beach....

Please Help The Stephen A. Heckling Society Of Gentlemen
Sad news: The Stephen A. Heckling Society of Gentlemendid not get tickets to tonight's NBA Draft. If anyone can get these invaluable correspondents into WaMu this evening, please contact me at [email protected] Let the sock roar again....

LeBron, Meet Your New Teammate: Shaquille O'Neal
The Cavaliers and Suns have reached a deal in principle to send Shaquille O'Neal to the Land of LeBron, Yahoo! Sports reports. Ben Wallace, Sasha Pavlovic and a pick to Phoenix. No confirmation from @THE_REAL_SHAQ yet. [Yahoo!, Twitter]...