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In Game With Gut-Sick Joel Embiid, Raptors Are The Ones To Shit Their Pants
Joel Embiid was listed as probable headed into Game 2 of the Eastern Conference semifinal series between the 76ers and Raptors, with a case of gastroenteritis. It’s a stomach virus, and is experienced as a lot of stomach pain and diarrhea, which is definitely not the condition you want to be in whil...
Mike Francesa Blames Giants Draft Pick For Getting Shot And Bringing Shame To The Team
Two Washburn University football players were shot outside of a party in Topeka, Kansas early Sunday morning, according to the Topeka PD. Junior defensive back Dwane Simmons was pronounced dead at the scene, while his teammate Corey Ballentine suffered non-life threatening injuries. Hours before the...
Pay-To-Play Is The Stadium Grift That Keeps On Giving
Sometime in the next few days, Indiana Gov. Eric Holcomb—aka the guy who took Mike Pence’s job when Pence ascended to the Old Executive Office Building—is expected to sign a bill extending the Indiana Pacers’ lease in Indianapolis through 2044. In exchange for agreeing to have his team play where it...
Philippine MMA Promotion Hosts Extremely Sloppy 3-On-3 Fight
Last weekend, regional Philippine MMA promotion Universal Reality Combat Championship showcased several of the Philippines’ most promising fighters fighting the normal way, and then also six other dudes fighting three-on-three. It was not as action-packed as you might imagine....
Brad Gilbert Will Run For Justin Gimelstob's Seat On The ATP Board, May Spare The ATP Some Actual Decisions
Brad Gilbert, tennis world fixture, ESPN analyst, and high-volume tweeter, announced yesterday that he will run for a position on the ATP Board of Directors currently occupied by Justin Gimelstob....
Fernando Tatis Jr. Leaves Padres-Nationals After Doing A Split He Was Not Prepared For
In the bottom of the 10th, Victor Robles went for a bunt to try and advance a runner, Wilmer Difo, to second base. Padres pitcher Matt Wisler made a run towards the ball in an attempt to at least stop Difo from advancing. Fernando Tatis Jr. was under the impression that Wisler’s throw was not going ...
Arizona's Zack Godley Wiggles Ass, Balks Home A Run
The first sign that the Diamondbacks were in for a long night against the Cubs came even before the first inning started, when a healthy population of Chicago fans filled the seats of Chase Field. The second sign came in the top of the third, when a seemingly harmless rump shake from pitcher Zack Go...
Josh Rosen Handles Cardinals Exit Maturely While Steve Smith Is Left To Find Another Young Player To Get Mad At For No Reason
The instant that the Cardinals selected Kyler Murray with the first-overall pick in the NFL Draft, the conversation surrounding Josh Rosen’s future with the franchise went from wondering if he’ll be the team’s starting quarterback next season, to wondering when he’ll get traded and where he’ll go....
Vladimir Tarasenko Remains The Best Reason To Watch The Blues
Goaltender Jordan Binnington is getting the overwhelming share of attention during this dominant run the Blues have enjoyed since putting him in net halfway through the season, and it’s not hard to see why. The team sucked before he showed up, and now they’re in the second round of the playoffs with...
It's Not Really The Playoffs Until There's A Brad Marchand Controversy
The most irritating man in hockey had returned for the second round of the playoffs after lying relatively dormant in the first, as Bruins forward Brad Marchand is back to inventing petty tricks to get in his opponents’ heads....
Joe Biden Wants To Be The Donald Trump For White People Who Don't Like Donald Trump
Joe Biden’s campaign announcement video—he’s running for president, of course—begins with Charlottesville, Va. It’s a choice, and the construct it reflects is an interesting one. It says a lot....
Rhys Hoskins Trolled The Mets With A Leisurely Stroll Around The Bases
Brawny Phillies slugger Rhys Hoskins smashed a moonshot homer to left in the top of the ninth inning of Philadelphia’s 6–0 win over the Mets Tuesday night. The dinger came at the expense of Mets reliever Jacob Rhame, who then had to endure Hoskins taking a looooooong time to round the bases:...
Vlad Jr. Is Finally, Finally Bringing His Mighty Dingers To The Majors
Huzzah, baseball friends! Vladimir Guerrero Jr., who has been the best and most exciting and most popular player in the Toronto Blue Jays organization for more than a year, is now finally good enough to join the Toronto Blue Jays:...
Zack Wheeler Demolished The Phillies In A Variety Of Ways
Baseball’s reliance on increasingly advanced stats can be alienating for those who don’t spend a large chunk of their summers deep in FanGraphs databases and Statcast k-holes. But sometimes, all you need is to look at a box score and see one player going buckwild to understand what happened....
This Penalty Kick Is So Bad That The Player Who Took It Was Immediately Cut
It’s been quite the whirlwind week for Venezuelan soccer player Bendix Parra. Last Tuesday, he was a starter in one of the biggest matches in the history of his club, Paraguay’s Independiente. This Tuesday, he found himself unemployed when Independiente tore up his contract. All of this for one espe...
Mallex Smith Just Straight-Up Swatted Austin Hedges's Fly Ball Over The Wall
Not all dingers are created equal. Some rocket out of the park at 118 miles an hour and are never seen again; some are routine fly balls that get pushed a few inches beyond the wall by a helpful wind. Some stay in the yard, like cowards. This one, from Austin Hedges of the San Diego Padres, had no b...
Phillies Third Base Coach Owns The Absolute Hell Out Of Maikel Franco
One of the cooler moments televised baseball has to offer is a liner to left with a reasonably quick runner on second base. The camera cuts to the standard view of a ball in play, and you get a good look at everything happening all at once: the ball cruising through the left side and into the outfie...
Fabio Fognini Is One Slippery Noodle
When a tennis shot is shanked, shallow, spinless, or otherwise borked, the culprit is often a too-tight arm. The more an amateur tries to muscle the ball, the less they’ll actually accomplish. Power comes from relaxed muscles working in unison. There might not exist a material in the tennis universe...
Let's Catch Up On The State Of The Marvel Cinematic Universe In Time For <i>Avengers: Endgame</i>
Hello friends! As you’re well aware by now, Avengers: Endgame opens in theaters this weekend, finally bringing to a—uh, well, not a close or a conclusion, but uh like some kind of large-scale branding transition for Disney and its Marvel Studios subsidiary, where they will arbitrarily plant a flag a...
Jake Arrieta Was Quite Peeved At Bryce Harper For Getting Ejected
The Phillies were meek losers in New York last night, going down 5-1 to the Mets while putting together just three hits. It was the kind of game that can produce a lot of frustration; it did that for Bryce Harper, who got ejected for arguing balls and strikes in the fourth inning, and for Phillies s...