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The Time Dave McKenna Converted His Son From Katy Perry To Minor Threat
Our beloved colleague Dave McKenna tells good stories. He’s done a lot of cool shit, met many weird people in weird ways, and had his run-ins with the law. And after selfishly squirreling all his stories away in Slack and our brains for years, we’ve realized we have a societal obligation to share....
Max Domi Sucker-Punched Aaron Ekblad
NHL opening night is less than two weeks away, and it’s safe to assume the Canadiens, mired in mediocrity and dysfunction, feel like they have a lot to prove. They’re also not going to be very good at hockey, which is often a recipe for a team eager to scrap. Yes, even in preseason. ...
USADA Says Jon Jones Can Return To The Octagon As Early As Next Month
The United States Anti-Doping Agency finally announced Wednesday its punishment of Jon Jones, for failing a doping test at UFC 214 last July. The USADA arbitrator found that Jones’s steroid use was unintentional, and hit Jones with a 15-month suspension, retroactive to July 28, 2017....
Jose Abreu's Had A Run Of Bad Luck With His Groin Area
White Sox first baseman José Abreu will miss his team’s upcoming series with the Indians, as he was hospitalized and treated for “an ingrown hair infection in his right thigh.” That’s disconcerting and gross enough on its own, but when combined with the fact that Abreu just underwent surgery for a “...
Chip The Buffalo Destroyed His Dick And Balls With A T-Shirt Cannon<em></em>
No point in keeping you waiting for this one—on Saturday, Chip the Buffalo, Colorado’s sideline mascot, blasted his dick and balls with damn t-shirt cannon and by the grace of God, someone had their phone out to film the vicious neutering of what was once a happy-go-lucky creature....
<i>Golf Digest</i> Helped Free An Innocent Man From Prison
In 2012, Golf Digest published a first-person essay by Valentino Dixon (co-written with Max Adler, the magazine’s editorial director). Dixon had never played golf, never even stepped foot on a golf course; he was an inmate at Attica Correctional Facility in New York. He was serving 39-to-life for a ...
![Report: Jimmy Butler Wants Out Of Minnesota [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/lqylp2y2xhxve5drmgjf.jpg)
Report: Jimmy Butler Wants Out Of Minnesota [Update]
Clearly all was not well in Minnesota. Via The Athletic’s Shams Charania and Jon Krawczynski, we can now see the full scope of that unwellness: Jimmy Butler, the Timberwolves’ star of the present, has asked to be traded, possibly due to conflict with their star of the future, or maybe it’s just Andr...
Oh Good, Time For Patriots Fans To Get Mad At ESPN Again
Those were good times, weren’t they? When that big ESPN report on a schism between Tom Brady and Bill Belichick, driven in part by Brady’s shady nutrition “guru” Alex Guerrero, dropped right before the playoffs and set off rounds of denials and non-denials and recriminations, and a whole lot of scre...
Philly's Once Ambitious General Manager Search Finally Lands On, Of All People, Elton Brand
Not too long ago the 76ers were courting Daryl Morey to replace disgraced former general manager Bryan Colangelo, in a sign of the organization’s lofty ambitions for the next chapter of Sixers basketball. By that same token, not too long ago the Sixers were hoping to court LeBron James and Paul Geor...
Deadspin Up All Night: Flavor Tropical
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Zip it up and zip it out....
Michael Bradley Might As Well Retire After Zlatan Ibrahimović Ethered Him
Zlatan Ibrahimović scored what might have been the greatest goal of his life last Saturday in the L.A. Galaxy’s game against Toronto FC. Somehow, that goal—the 500th of his career—might not have been the most ruthless thing he did that day....
Wonderteen Christian Pulisic, Who Is Now A Wonderman, Scores Winner On 20th Birthday
Christian Pulisic turned 20 years old today, which means he is no longer the Wonderteen we have all known and loved, but instead a full-grown Wonderman. He showed his newfound maturity by scoring the lone goal and winner for Borussia Dortmund in the 85th minute of their Champions League opener again...
Orioles Catcher Caleb Joseph Wants All His Teammates To Think About How Badly They Suck
The Orioles have won 43 games this season. They’ve lost 107. They are tied with the 1988 team for most losses in franchise history. Given all this, it’d be bigger news if players weren’t talking about how much the team sucks, but catcher Caleb Joseph, who’s been with the organization since he was ...
Ass Team Of The Week: Everything Is Wrong With The Arizona Cardinals
There are often discrete reasons that go a long way toward explaining a bad team’s badness. Look to the New York Giants, a team with a decent defense, perhaps the best receiver in the league, and a superhuman rookie running back that is nonetheless very bad because of one simple reason: they can’t b...
Deadspin Up All Night: My Momma Told Me
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. If you’re in Chicago, go ask Megan how the Raiders did yesterday....
Josh Gordon Traded To The Patriots, Of Fucking Course
And here are the terms:...
Mike Zimmer On Why He Cut Kicker Daniel Carlson: "Did You See The Game?"
Being a kicker in the NFL sucks not only because everyone gets mad at you when you fuck up, but also because nobody ever respected you all that much in the first place. How else to explain Vikings head coach Mike Zimmer answering a question about why he cut kicker Daniel Carlson—who missed three fie...
Auld Lad At Ireland Bookie Shop Thwarts Three Armed Robbers
There may come a time in life when you’re 83 years old and posted up at the bookies in Glanmire, Ireland, enjoying the retired life. When three men wielding hammers and a gun barge in, what will you do? “You can either run and hide or take a stand and I took a stand,” was the answer that Denis O’Co...
Deadspin Up All Night: You Got Some Nice Shoulders
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. CSH is a sneaky great live band and my jumping muscles are still sore from seeing them Friday....
![A Bullshit Penalty Let The Vikings Tie The Packers [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/cjsfxubowdd5gqxjfgy1.gif)
A Bullshit Penalty Let The Vikings Tie The Packers [Update]
The NFL’s absolutely terrible and impossible new definition of roughing the passer—which prohibits defensive players from landing on quarterbacks with their body weight—came into play during today’s Vikings-Packers game and directly affected the outcome. In what eventually became a 29-29 tie (don’t ...