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Basketball Is Dead. The Knicks And Sixers Murdered It.
All the precious, fragile, bitterly-won gains of humankind's wretched, fitful, brave, millennia-long upward struggle went up in white-hot magnesium flames last night in Philadelphia and burned away to powder. All for nothing. All fantasies, every damn one. The Knicks and Sixers have shown us ours...


"Way To Go, Paul": Hulk-Like Hockey Parent Breaks Glass With Slap
Look, I'm going to play this one straight: I know absolutely nothing about this video. It was tweeted at us from an unknown Twitter account, has almost no description, and was posted by a seemingly normal YouTube account that has been around for five years. I cannot find any other trace of it on...

Deadspin Up All Night: Trap Queen
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Aloha. ...

How To Survive At The Poker Table
Poker used to be cool. From Wild Bill Hickok getting shot up over aces and eights to Paul Newman and Robert Shaw eyefucking each other in The Sting, it has always held a place in American culture as the game you'd find grown-ass men playing in the smoke-filled back rooms of grown-ass places. Blame...

NCAA Investigating Academic Fraud At 20 Colleges
Remember that academic fraud scandal at UNC, the one that revealed the term "student-athlete" to be just as hollow and fraudulent as you always assumed it was? Well, get ready to start hearing about many more scandals just like it....

Upgrade Your Garbage Disposal, Trim Your Hair, and More Deals
One of today's Amazon Gold Box deals is a highly-rated garbage disposal for $110, or about $40 less than usual. This price is only available today, or until sold out. [ Waste King A1SPC Knight 1.0 Horsepower Garbage Disposal, $110]...

How To Conquer Sticky Spills With Patience (Or None At All)
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....

UFC Fighter Tased By Cops; Wife Records The Whole Thing
The video above was shot by Madeleine Herman, wife of UFC fighter Dave Herman, and it shows the fighter getting tased by cops at a gas station after exiting his car during a traffic stop....

Brad Johnson Paid Some Guys To Doctor 100 Footballs Before Super Bowl
As we deal with the unfolding Patriots scandal, we seek context. And it's unclear precisely how common the practice of illegally doctoring footballs actually is among quarterbacks. But it's obvious that the urge to do so is universal, because the benefits are real and significant. Ask Brad Johnson, ...

The Patriots' Ballghazi Scandal Cannot Be Overblown Enough
If you've been struggling to care about the Patriots being accused of deflating footballs, and have been hoping the whole thing would just blow over so we could get to talking about a truly excellent and fascinating Super Bowl matchup, you, my friend, are shit out of luck. Ballghazi is real, and it ...

Deadspin Up All Night: Down The Street
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. We must move forward, not backward; upward, not forward....

Bad Seahawks Dad Ruins Baby's Birthday Song With Loud Swearing
Details here are a bit scarce, but what we appear to have is a nice mom attempting to record a birthday song with her cute baby, probably so that she can send the video to grandma and grandpa, or something. Unfortunately, the song gets ruined by Bad Seahawks Dad, who forgot to use his inside voice w...

Multi-Clad Cookware Set, Fox Searchlight Collection, and More Deals
If you want the advantages of multi-clad cookware without paying All-Clad prices, this 10-piece set has terrific reviews, and a great low price of $130 today. It's been popular among our readers in the past....

And Now, Your Worst Failed Romantic Gestures
Back in eighth grade, I fell in love with a girl who didn't want anything to do with me, and the lovesickness got so bad that I played up the friend angle and called her every night, hoping and praying she would change her mind and want to hook up with me (NOPE). Anyway, I've told this story befo...

Robert Allenby's Kidnapping Story Just Keeps Getting Weirder
Golfer Robert Allenby, whose story of being kidnapped from a Hawaii wine bar, beaten, and dumped in the street sounded too incredible to be true, probably needs to explain why his only witness now says that everything he's claimed is wrong....

How To Meet Your Significant Other's Parents Without Terrifying Them
Of all the fraught rites of new-relationship escalation—Facebook status changes and move-ins and one of you using the toilet while the other showers and so on—none inspires more anticipatory dread than the Parent Meet. And for a whole host of legitimate reasons: the psychic weight of parental app...

Mets Owner To Run MLB's Finance Committee
Incoming commissioner Rob Manfred has begun swinging the ax, installing his preferred owners in positions of power and shunting Bud Selig's confidants to the side. But one of those Selig allies, Mets owner and CEO Fred Wilpon, isn't just being put out to pasture: he's been appointed chairman of MLB'...

Throwing The Ball Off Your Defender's Hands: The New Bounce Pass
When a player bulldogs their way into the lane, it can be tough to find a teammate to pass to. With their body and focus on the hoop, most of the court isn't in their line of vision. Hitting a teammate at the top of the key, for instance, means whipping a difficult no-look pass or telegraphing their...

Sad Derrick Rose Airballs An Open Goddamn Layup
Oooh, that is a slick little move, there. The ball-fake to freeze Timofey Mozgov, the little half-Eurostep toward the middle of the lane, the midair adjustment as Mozgov recovers to contest. And then, what in the damn hell. Did the Earth shift 18 inches off its normal orbital path while Rose w...