ads Page 389 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Watch Your Hands, Lady
• One excitable cancer kid. • Barry Bonds and Alan Thicke, ice skatin'. • Seattle will say goodbye to the Sonics. • Super! • Will Demps is tired of your breasts. • Hirshey wraps up the first weekend of the EPL. Oh, and Beckham scored. • Hey, the MNF crew sounds pretty good so far. • Stoner GMs, man....
Bide Your Time And Everything Becomes Clear, And You Can Act Accordingly
You tell them, you tell them we're coming. Tell them we're fucking coming!...
You Can't Tell, But Howie Long Is Erect
If we know our average Deadspin reader, you were obviously watching "Fox & Friends" on the Fox News Channel this morning. But just in case ... Richard Simmons was hanging out with the FOX NFL Sunday crew. Finally, someone who makes Jimmy Johnson look well dressed, and Terry Bradshaw look less gay. ...
It's Deadspin HOF Nominations Time
Heavens, it seems like it's been almost 360 days since we introduced the Deadspin Hall of Fame, though it's only been 51 weeks. Holy bejeezus: Our little site is turning two years old in a couple of weeks. Well, guess what, folks: It's time to take nominations for the 2007 class....
Side Effects Of Finasteride May Include Dizziness, Shortness Of Breath, And Suspension
Rick Guttormson had it all. Baseball talent, beautiful hair, a last name that rolls off the tongue, and the adoration of countless Japanese fan dancers. When the American Dream doesn't come through for someone, this is probably the next best thing. Then it all came crashing down in the form of a 20-...
Bonds Brings Us Down, But Ankiel Lifts Us Up
• All the EPL you can handle. Remember to meet Mr. Hirshey this weekend for EPL opening weekend. • Bonds hit his damn homer already. • Rick Reilly ... shirtless! • It's always fun when Irish pick up prostitutes. • Remember to join the Deadspin Pants Party College Pick 'Em Pool. • Duck! Jay Mohr's ba...
Red, It Took Us 16 Years To Get Here. You Play Us, And I'll Give Ya The Best We Got.
You're better than any player we ever had. And you're the best God damn hitter we ever saw. Suit up....
The Mariners Like 'Em Big
Ever wanted a six-foot doll of Raul Ibanez? Well, boy howdy, this could be your lucky day. As long as you have four figures to spend....
Back When The Fielders Got Along
This might have something to do with it:...
This Headline Will Not Include Barry Bonds
• Way to go, Iraq! Oh, sorry. • Pujols, Pop-A-Shot. • Gilbert is funny when he takes other people's jokes. • Quiet, Deion. • The live report from the Arena Bowl. • Pete Rose is charming. • Ow ow ow. • Pac Man Jones, rasslin'. • We're map happy! • Goodnight, ESPN. • Matt Leinart is optimistic about t...
We Like You As Much As We Can Like Anyone Who Thinks We're An Asshole
If anything happens to us, you tell every woman we've ever gone out with we were talking about her at the end. That way they'll have to reevaluate us....
It's Never Good When The MLS Has The Best Week
explains Beckham to us much better than we did to the world. • Careful of what cars you steal. • One more time: Gay Yankees. • We live blogged a guy talking into a microphone. • Stop the ESPN Motion. • Matt Leinart says he's a great dad, and even remembers his kid's name. • Our NFL Season Previews b...
Can't Sleep, Clown Will Eat Us
In honor of "The Simpsons Movie" coming out today, we're not even gonna try to bother with a movie quote today. Instead, we just invite everybody to give their own....
Please Consult Your Employee Handbook
• The memo that changed our lives. The part where Skipper explains what a leader is, that's still our favorite one. • Tommy Morrison loves black people. • Kill the ref! No, seriously, they might kill him. • Fight, children, fight. • Joe Torre is a racist, don't ya know. • We are not going to Fire Is...
Make Like A Tree And Get Out Of Here
Last night, Darth Vader came down from planet Vulcan and told us that if we didn't take Lorraine out that he'd melt my brain....
Slap Some Logos On Those Journalists; They Like It
The NFL tends to be the sports world's leader in maximizing revenue opportunities, but they might have outdone themselves: They're slapping advertising logos on the media members....
Dog Days Of All-Star Week
• What a dull week. • Not a happy time at Dan Shaughnessy's Amazon page. • Everywhere you look, there is Spike The Super Ball. • Kige Ramsey makes the world a better place. • Have a Coke and smile. • Jared Allen, signing things that aren't fun to have signed. • We hear Simmons is definitely doing an...
You Don't Go To Work Every Day; You Go To A Bar Every Day
That's why we drink it straight. The ice cubes are too heavy....