ah Page 333 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Seahawks Beat Lions After Referees Miss Easy Illegal Batting Call
Down 13-10 with just under two minutes left against the Seahawks Monday night, Detroit quarterback Matthew Stafford dropped back from the Seattle 11 and found an open Calvin Johnson. As Johnson was tackled with the ball about to cross the plane of the end zone, Kam Chancellor popped it out of Megatr...

Foul-Mouthed Indiana Heckler Profane, Repetitive
Fans watching today’s Ohio State-Indiana game couldn’t help but notice a foul-mouthed heckler standing near one of ESPN’s crowd microphones. He carried on for several minutes in this profane fashion, though he really should work on finding some new material....

Here's Trevor Noah's First <i>Daily Show </i>Monologue, Which Totally Didn't Suck
You only watch a late-night talk show in full, on actual television, at the appointed hour, twice: the host’s first episode, and his last. So say hello to Trevor Noah, your new Daily Show host, who awkwardly plows right through his inaugural applause and Just Gets On With It. He was okay! This is go...

Uriah Hall Nails Spinning Back Kick In Outstanding Display Of Violence
Someday, when he’s an old man, Uriah Hall is going to remember the time he hit a spinning back kick-to-flying knee combination on Gegard Mousasi at the Saitama Super Arena and feel all warm inside. (Mousasi will also remember this when he is an old man, though he will presumably feel somewhat differ...

Utah Tires Of Pummeling Oregon, Starts Beating Up Fox Camera Operators Too
Utah extended its shocking blowout lead over Oregon 55-13 tonight with a 69-yard punt return that confused fans, Ducks punt coverage team members, and Fox camera operators. The fake fair catch seemed to fool everyone except, of course, Gus Johnson. (You might remember the Rams running this play last...

Frustrated Idaho Fan Fills Campus With Flyers Calling For Paul Petrino's Firing
Idaho’s football program is 1-2, and some anonymous Vandals fan (or fans) is completely fed up with head coach Paul Petrino. Per the Spokesman-Review, “hundreds” of flyers calling for Petrino’s firing were spread around the university’s campus Monday night....

Report: Kam Chancellor's Coming To Save The Seahawks
The Seattle Seahawks are 0-2, and a big reason why has been the absence of their all-world safety, Kam Chancellor, who has been holding out for a better contract. Well, according to ESPN’s Adam Schefter (by way of Stephen A. Smith), Chancellor has given up on his holdout and is headed back to Seattl...

John Tortorella's Conference Call Got Hijacked By Pranksters
USA Hockey named John Tortorella the head coach of the 2016 U.S. World Cup team on Monday, and set up a conference call with Torts and the media today. These teleconferences between coaches and reporters are commonplace, and the call-in number is usually well guarded. That was not the case with this...

Pete Carroll Says The Refs Blew That Big Fumble Call
Midway through the fourth quarter, with Seattle down seven and driving, Russell Wilson was picked off by Jayrone Elliott on an attempted screen pass. But Elliott coughed up the ball, and after the pile-on was cleared, Seahawks tackle Justin Britt came up with it. Packers ball, the officials said. Ca...

Aaron Rodgers Makes Fun Of Russell Wilson By Crediting God For The Packers' Win
After the Packers’ 27-17 win over the Seahawks last night, Aaron Rodgers gave the credit to God. Which wouldn’t be a thing, normally: athletes do that all the time. Except Rodgers is already on record as believing God doesn’t care about Packers-Seahawks games. This was a shot at Russell Wilson....

Zlatan Books Entire Town Square So Fans Can Watch Him Beat Down On His Old Team
Soccer has taken Zlatan Ibrahimović (or is it the other way around?) all around the world. From Paris to Barcelona to Turin to Milan and beyond, Zlatan came, saw, and conquered many of Europe’s greatest cities. Now he’s back where it all started, and he’s making sure the whole city gets a view of T...

Richard Sherman And Michael Bennett Are Having A Serious Public Debate On Black Lives Matter
Over the past few days, two Seahawks have publicly offered differing opinions on the Black Lives Matter movement, police brutality, poverty, and a host of related issues. In the usually anodyne world of athlete press conferences, it’s really something....

Ducks' Clayton Stoner Charged For Killing And Beheading Cheeky The Bear
NHL player Clayton Stoner, then with the Minnesota Wild, traveled to British Columbia in May of 2013, killed a grizzly bear, cut off his head, and posed for a photo. That September, we declared him an enemy of Deadspin. Today, Stoner’s facing five charges related to the death of Cheeky the bear....

Kyle Seager Trolled Jered Weaver Into Getting Ejected
You probably won’t see a beanball more obviously deliberate than the one Jered Weaver laid on Kyle Seager in last night’s 3-1 Mariners win. Or one more nonchalant....

Seahawks Coaches Don't Mind Marshawn Lynch's Mom Calling For Darrell Bevell's Job
The Seahawks’ predilection for theatrics generally works well for them—they’re winning, after all, and nothing can be too deleterious when you win. Which is why, if you’re a fan of drama, this team is going to be fun when it starts losing. The lighthearted controversies will turn histrionic, and the...

Kam Chancellor's Holdout Couldn't Be Going Any Better
Kam Chancellor is still negotiating with the Seahawks for a new contract, and as his holdout bled into Week 1 of the regular season, undrafted sophomore Dion Bailey took his place at strong safety Sunday against the Rams. It was clear that Chancellor’s starting job will be waiting for him when he co...

Seahawks Choose To Run This Time With Game On The Line, Still Lose
The Seahawks lost a wild one in overtime in St. Louis today. Nick Foles took the field for the first time as a Ram and he was very solid with 297 yards and touchdowns via air and ground, but the truly remarkable part of the game was the *fart noise* that was the Seahawks’ overtime effort. ...

Two Utah Football Players Suffer Gunshot Wounds At Party
Two Utah football players are in stable condition following gunshot wounds suffered late Saturday night. The players are named as sophomore TE Lo Falemaka and freshman RB Marcel Brooks-Brown. ...

To Hell With Vox's Victorian-Living Idiots
Yesterday, Vox published a first-person essay detailing the anachronistic existence of two insufferably twee hipsters who live as if they were insufferably twee 19th-century urban gentry. Fuck these people....

Irony Is Dead: Bakersfield Condors Unveil Oil-Themed Mascot
Condors are majestic creatures. The California Condor, which historically ranged across the West Coast and Southwest (and even to Florida way back in the day), is the largest land bird in North America. In the late 1980s the California Condor went extinct in the wild, due to poaching and various typ...