ah Page 335 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
American Pharoah Wins Again
Fast horse American Pharoah is still fast, as the Triple Crown winner walked away with another win—this time in the Haskell Invitational, claiming a winner’s share of the $1.75 million purse. Call us when he’s been entered into the Breeder’s Cup....
Truly I Say To You Today That Bono Is An Asswipe
At the intersection of all the annoying things a rock star can be—messianic, pretentious, vapid, dumb, old, creatively bankrupt, grandiose, utterly bereft of self-awareness, calcified into a grotesque oily wire-rack-in-the-grocery-store knockoff of himself, part of U2, et cetera—there sits Bono in h...
Russell Wilson Finally Got Himself Paid
Russell Wilson has been an NFL oddity the last few seasons: a franchise quarterback making peanuts. This is because he was drafted in the third round, and the CBA makes it impossible for any player drafted that late—no matter how quickly they may rise to stardom—to earn more than a couple million do...
Man, Soccer Dudes (Zlatan Excluded) Really Suck At Basketball
I’d understand the sheer ineptitude on display here and the failure to even appear to know what that silly American sport is supposed to look like if we were talking football, but PSG’s players can’t even mimic basketball right? These dudes are out here celebrating lay ups as if they were windmill d...
Raheem Sterling Is Making Bank Because England Sucks
Raheem Sterling is already, at just 20 years of age, a damn good player, with every chance to become great. This obviously and understandably makes him a very valuable asset, as his now official English-record transfer and new salary attest. What he isn’t is £180,000 a week good. His mix of current ...
Pizza Hut's Hot Dog Pizza Isn't Quite Gross Enough
In this strange age of pizza shaming, when Pizzeria Uno has rebranded as Uno’s Chicago Grill, California Pizza Kitchen is deemphasizing flatbread in favor of tequila and quinoa, Domino’s is hawking cheesesteaks, and even Papa Goddamn John is hard-selling chicken poppers, Pizza Hut is staying true to...
Blazers Offer Enes Kanter The Max, Stick It To The Thunder
After last night, it felt like we’d seen the last of the drama that this year’s NBA free-agency period had to offer. But then the Blazers went and signed Thunder center and restricted free agent Enes Kanter to a max offer sheet, which puts Oklahoma City’s front office in a position where they are so...
Vince McMahon’s Rules For WWE Announcers Allegedly Leaked
Over on Squared Circle, the subreddit for professional wrestling, a user has posted eight pages of what purports to be instructions and rules given to WWE announcers a few years ago about everything from how they should dress to specific phrases they should avoid. You can view the notes in the imgur...
Report: Marshawn Lynch's Biopic Won't Be Released Because It's So Bad
The internet was treated in February to roughly four minutes of sloppily edited footage featuring Marshawn Lynch for what appeared to be a biopic based on the Seahawks running back. (Watch it here.) Those four minutes are apparently all the public will get, because Family First is reportedly never s...
A Lakers Story, In Four Tweets
The Lakers had the first crack at meeting with free agent LaMarcus Aldridge last night. They were actually the first of several teams to get a meeting, and Aldridge insisted that all meetings happen in L.A. Lots of people were excited about the meeting. ...
DeMarre Carroll Leaves Atlanta For Toronto, Is Getting Paid
DeMarre Carroll has joined Pero Antic as the second former Atlanta Hawk to elect to play on foreign soil for the upcoming season....
Reports: GM Jerry Dipoto Forced Out in Anaheim
Jerry Dipoto has learned an inviolable rule of working for the Angels: get into a power struggle with Arte Moreno’s guy, and you’re not going to win it. According to multiple reports, the Anaheim GM resigned and packed up his office last night....
Report: Angels' GM Accuses Coaches Of Ignoring Scouting Reports
According to a report from Fox Sports’ Ken Rosenthal, Angels manager Mike Scioscia and GM Jerry Dipoto are feudin’ again. The two have never quite gotten along—following the 2012 season it appeared that one or both would have to be fired—but this latest tension surrounds a battle for the strategic h...
Marshawn Lynch Dives Into "End Zone" Full Of Skittles On <i>Conan</i>
The notably media-reluctant Marshawn Lynch has been popping up on TV a bit more in the offseason, and was Conan O’Brien’s guest tonight as the late night talker set up an “end zone” full of Skittles for the star running back to dive backward into. He even did his signature dick grab....
Jahlil Okafor Looks Pretty Excited To Play For The 76ers
The Philadelphia 76ers presented their new draftees to the press yesterday, though it seems third overall pick Jahlil Okafor isn’t too psyched to put on the jersey....
Fuck This Bear: <i>Ted 2</i>,<i> </i>Reviewed
1. How sincere is Sincere Seth MacFarlane? I know I’m a dope for even asking—associating a genuine emotion with such a sniggering clown is a sucker’s bet—but I really do want to know. Because Ted 2 has moments, lots of moments, that it seems to play completely straight, as if we are watching an actu...
Blazers Send Nic Batum To Hornets For Noah Vonleh And Gerald Henderson
The Portland Trail Blazers are trading swingman Nic Batum to the Charlotte Hornets for forward Noah Vonleh and shooting guard Gerald Henderson. The deal was first reported by Yahoo’s Adrian Wojnarowski. ...
Liverpool Don't Deserve Raheem Sterling
Here’s our daily exercise in keeping competing thoughts in our heads at the same time. European soccer has become player ruled. Particularly in the post-Chelsea, post-Manchester City era, there’s more money sloshing around in the top league than many entire nations. There’s no loyalty to club and no...