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Deadspin Up All Night: Duck A Diddle Dill, Dill
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Have a good evening. Go see Guardians of the Galaxy tonight....

One Of These Three Men Will Be The Next MLB Commissioner
Bob Nightengale at USA Today has a big scoop: the field of finalists for MLB Commissioner has been narrowed down to three, and one of them is a pretty huge surprise. There are two of Bud Selig's top deputies, and, somewhat out of nowhere, the chairman and minority owner of the Red Sox....

Why Kids Today Are So Much Better With Computers Than You Were
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Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Jacksonville Jaguars
Some people are fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

The Story Behind Those Jerry Jones Photos Is Weirder Than The Photos
Those weird photos of Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and some ladies hanging out in what appears to be a bathroom come with an equally bughouse backstory. They were first put on the internet by a man named Frank Hoover, who alleges that they were taken by people looking to set up Jerry Jones in an ex...

The Funeral At Fenway
Our man Charlie Pierce is in fine form over at Grantland writing about the 2013 Red Sox:...

FSU Paid For Jameis Winston's Insurance Policy On His Draft Stock
Florida State QB Jameis Winston is eligible for the NFL draft after this season, and barring catastrophe, will go very high and will make a lot of money. But what if something catastrophic does happen? There's insurance for that, and it emerged yesterday that Winston won't be footing the bill alone—...

Here's A Lady Rubbing Her Face On Jerry Jones's Crotch
This deeply upsetting picture comes to us by way of a very strange Twitter user, along with a few other pictures of Jerry Jones and some ladies getting gross and weird together....

A's Fans Rage One Last Time For Former Closer Grant Balfour
A cool thing happened in the bottom of the tenth inning of last night's extra-innings tilt between the Rays and Athletics. Grant Balfour, who spent three seasons becoming an Oakland fan favorite as the A's hard-throwing bullpen goon, came on to pitch for the Rays against his old squad. Even with t...

Deadspin Up All Night: Gossips, Frauds, And Snakes
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Lookit those cucumbers grow....

Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Tennessee Titans
Some people are fans of the Tennessee Titans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Tennessee Titans. This 2014 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Clemson QB Scares People; One Guy Reacts By Slapping Him
Clemson Tigers quarterback Cole Stoudt dressed in full football gear and stood in a hallway so he could frighten victims walking by, because scared people in pranks are amusing when they aren't you....

Alabama Fans Sprint For Nick Saban's Autograph
There are few traditions quite like the Running of the Bama Fans, as fans run across the length of Bryant-Denny Stadium to line up for Nick Saban's autograph. AL.com has a pretty great gallery, from staff photographer Vasha Hunt. Here's the video:...

Paul George's Injury Has Some In The NBA Rethinking International Play
Paul George's catastrophic leg injury was horrible for him, of course, but rough too for the Pacers and for the NBA, which will be without him for a year. So it's not a surprise that everyone's reconsidering the calculus of international basketball, in which a whole bunch is risked for very little r...

We Missed Your Face, Eli
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Deadspin Up All Night: Everybody Knows
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Mets Fans Drop Some Sick Burns On Hunter Pence
Damn! Are you going to defend yourself, Hunter Pence, or let this dude trash your parallel parking skills?...

Mark Cuban Suggests An NBA World Cup
Dallas Mavericks owner and naked billionaire Mark Cuban has long been against the NBA's partnership with FIBA and the International Olympic committee, and Paul George's injury in Friday night's Team USA scrimmage gave him another opportunity to rip the current system of international play....

South Carolina Gamecocks Self-Report Rule-Breaking Cookie Cakes To NCAA
The latest example of unnecessary self-flagellation for the NCAA's satisfaction comes from South Carolina. The Gamecocks reported 22 minor violations of NCAA rules, and the dumbest by far involves the football team and cookie cakes....