all Page 1947 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Brent Musburger, Shilling For Tortilla Chips Since 2002
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Your "Stolen Laptop Vs. Stolen Projector" Auburn-Oregon Open Thread
Auburn's bigger; Oregon actually has something resembling a defense. Oregon has a running game; Auburn has Cam Newton, who is their running game. This one should be high scoring, and fun to watch....

Chip Kelly Hopes Cam Newton Sprains An Ankle
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Oregon gameplan is simple....

The Rest Of The SEC Needs To Quit Rooting For Auburn
There's a nasty characteristic, endemic to but not solely the province of the SEC, in which fans of rival schools put that all aside to pull for their conference in big games. This is unacceptable....

The Wind Talkers Of Oregon Football Stump The Finest Minds
Tomorrow brings us another minor football contest and more of the cryptic placards of battleships and jack-o-lanterns that Oregon backup QB Dustin Haines has been flashing at teammates throughout the season. The system appears to have been designed by some mad genius....

Les Miles-To-Michigan Rumors Reach Flight-Tracking Stage, Entrail-Reading Stage
Sometime between LSU coach Les Miles asking his stylist for a "Ronald McDonald" and the Tigers stomping the Aggies in the Cotton Bowl, the mysterious plane here landed in Baton Rouge. WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?...

Terrelle Pryor Will Gank Your Sign
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Sometimes Bowling Balls Do Magical Things
BOWLING. Josh Scanlon rolls two strikes in the 10th frame during the Team USA trials. Then the ball comically slips out of his hands on his third shot. The ball takes it from there....

John Salley Story Corner: Spider Misses The Bus
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: an elaborate ruse to avoid being late....

Jim Harbaugh To The 49ers
Adam Schefter is reporting Jim Harbaugh will sign a 5-year deal with San Francisco, and get to coach the third- or fourth-best QB in the bay area....

Dan Shaughnessy Is Awful
I'd be remiss if I didn't point out this execrable column from Dan Shaughnessy that ran on SI's website earlier this week, and is yet another triumph of idiotic Boston provincialism....

Adventures In Accidental Anal Intercourse
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

The Only Time In History Someone's Been Excited To Play For A MAC School
With last night's GoDaddy.com Bowl, Miami (OH) became the first team ever to go from 10 losses to 10 wins in one year. Before the game, interim(!) coach Lance Guidry got them fired up....

TCU Billboards Near Ohio State Are The Best Comeback
The Little Sisters of the Poor apparently have enough money to put up billboards around Columbus, congratulating TCU on their Rose Bowl win. Take that, drivers of Central Ohio!...

Half-Court Buzzer Beater Not Hard Enough? Kid Does It No-Look, Backwards
This high schooler's too smooth to bother with things like aiming, following the flight of the ball, or celebrating. He's too busy contemplating the groupies he's going to plow through tonight....

Texas's Heisman Video For Eric Metcalf Is The Most Erotic Thing You'll Watch All Day
Bryan sends along this old Heisman promo for the great Texas running back Eric Metcalf, with music by the less-than-great Alabama band Alabama. The choice of song leaves it unclear if the video is asking for your vote or your pants....

Someone Keeps Screwing With Baseball Writers' Site
BBWAA.com has now been hacked three times (I believe) in the past day, but of course there is so much more to hacking than just statistics. [H/T Walk Off HBP]...

Bert Blyleven Got In <em>Because</em> Voters Are Irrational, And Other Hall Of Fame Revelations
This is Regressing, a new, numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard Sports Analysis Collective. Today: how a weird tic of Hall of Fame voters helped put Bert Blyleven in Cooperstown....

The Cruel Bastard’s Way To Fix Pass Interference
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Upstanding Young Oregon Fan Wants To Marry, Ditch Auburn Lass For A Bet
Meet Ryan Tharp. He knows two things: the Ducks are going to win Monday, and he's quite a catch. So he's looking for an Auburn gal to get hitched in Vegas, then get a quickie annulment the next day. Loser pays....