all Page 1981 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Thorough Analysis Of Han Solo’s Ability To Score Space Poon
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Minor League Promotion Will Put You Off Eating For A While
It wasn't your typical eating contest last night at Eastlake Stadium, home of the Indians' single-A club. No, it spanned nine innings, with nine different courses (that's Spam in the photo), and ended in vomit, vomit everywhere....

Joe Paterno And Dean Smith, Going Out On Their Own, Very Different Terms
Observations that Paterno's health — body and mind — have declined noticeably should be heartbreaking. So why aren't we as sad about it as we ought to be?...

Utah's Ban On Beer Sales Forces Baseball Team To Fold
The independent St. George RoadRunners ceased operations this week, with the owner citing the absence of beer at the ballpark as the critical factor. You try watching semi-pro ball, in the desert, surrounded by Mormons, and do it sober. [Deseret News]...

Spider-Man Outfielder Makes One Of The Greatest Catches Ever
This is from last night's Yokohama BayStars/Hiroshima Carp game. Breaks like this are why the BayStars are in last place, though I think Hiroshima would take issue with any other city calling itself unlucky....

Pick Against The Youngstown State Penguins At Your Own Risk, Pollsters
Here's coach, on their 7th place MVC ranking: "In some parts of this world we live in, if you disrespect someone, you may lose your life. Right or wrong. I don't handle disrespect well, and I'm sure my players won't either." [MyValleySports]...

In Defense Of Female Objectification
Oooh, loogit! We got letters! And here they are:...

American Footballer’s Soccer-Themed Touchdown Celebration
It was a toss up for the final video treat of the day - between the above, and a rendition of "Fire" by Kasabian, now that it's been unveiled as the official football song for the coming season....

This Is What It Looks Like When You Get Hit In The Face With A Beer Bottle
Oklahoma State linebacker Jamie Blatnick pleaded not guilty to (allegedly) hitting former teammate Steve Denning in the face with a beer bottle during a bar scrap early Sunday morning. [TulsaWorld]...

Grounds Crew Sets Fire To Baseball Field To Dry It
"It seemed like a good idea at the time" is a phrase that doesn't bode well. But rarely has there been so obviously not a good idea as burning a baseball field with diesel fuel to dry it out after it rains....

Mets Fan Eats It, Tastes Concourse
After the sixth inning of Friday's Mets-Diamondbacks tilt, SNY cameras caught a feathered-haired man assuredly stumbling down the concourse. What happened next was a master's class in "Confidence" and "Probably Too Drunk To Give A Shit." H/Ts Daniel and Jovan....

How Tampa Bay Shenanigans Affected the Trade Deadline
Oh, those pesky Hickeys. Seems as if Tampa Bay pitching coach Jim Hickey was involved in some horseplay — specifically, "wrestling, in a way" — which landed pitcher Grant Balfour on the 4-to-6-week shelf with a left rib strain....

Kerry Wood to the Yankees? Kerry Wood to the Yankees.
The Yankees will get Kerry Wood from the Indians, agreeing to pay about $1.5 million of the $3.6 million left on Wood’s contract. [SI.com] Wood was activated from the DL today. Mark Prior wasn’t. Brian Hickey cried while typing that. Joba Chamberlain cried while reading it....

Tyreke Evans Feels, Exploits the Need for Speed
Ignore the timeline: Coach K's refusal to allow Tyreke Evans to represent his country in the FIBA World Championships (July 28) is directly to blame for the Rookie of the Year's 120-plus mph Cali Cannonball Run (May 31)....

Deadspin Classic: Cats Playing Soccer? Cats Playing Soccer
In the summer of 2010, the World Cup captured the attention of this humble sports blog and it was only a matter of time before the Internet produced the perfect viral video to celebrate the event....

Steve Sarkisian Taunts Lane Kiffin With Cellphone Picture
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: everyone's favorite embattled college football coach: Lane Kiffin....

Great Moments In Drunken Hookup Failure: TRANNY EDITION!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Julio Mora: 22-Star Recruit
So, glitch on Rivals.com, or is Julio Mora the football-playing reincarnation of Shiva himself? [EDSBS]...

John Salley Story Corner: "Strap It Up And No Kissing"
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: why you shouldn't lip-kiss NBA groupies....

Rony Seikaly Thinks John Salley Is A Brilliant Storyteller
The former Heat center vehemently denies the conversation John Salley relayed in last week's introductory "John Salley Story Corner." Great start!...