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![If You Were Waiting On A Check From Glen Rice's Handball Tournament, We Have Bad News [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18j519r7noauhjpg.jpg)
If You Were Waiting On A Check From Glen Rice's Handball Tournament, We Have Bad News [UPDATE]
TMZ had the exclusive this morning — former Heat forward Glen Rice is being sued by some folks who produced and filmed his team handball tournament in Miami in 2009....

Watch An Unheralded Japanese Boxer Drop His Foe Three Times In The First Round
Just prior to last night's light-middleweight bout between the "exciting, unbeaten and seemingly unstoppable" James "Mandingo Warrior" Kirkland and Japanese boxer Nobuhiro Ishida, promoter Lou DiBella Tweeted "YOU'RE KIDDING,RIGHT?" when asked who he liked to win. As in, c'mon, Kirkland....

Cubs Fan* Who Slept On A Bar Floor Says She Likes Hot Guys Who Are Up For Anything
Sure, Opening Day is a distant memory, but "Henneman" of Chicago deserves mention. Not just because she slept under a table the night before to ensure access to good wings, beer deals, hats and "hot guys who are up for anything." But because she seems to think Alan Trammell, Ryne Sandberg and Harry...

The Dodgers Are Concerned Enough About Fan Violence To Offer Half-Priced Booze At Six Upcoming Games
The Los Angeles Dodgers have talked a good game in returning their stadium to something that doesn't resemble a gangland Thunderdome where opposing fans get beaten into comas for no discernible reason....

Even The Top Seed In The Playoffs Isn't Good Enough For This Expressive Bulls Fan
Your morning roundup for April 9, the day it became painfully evident that knowledge gleaned from the Old Testament and YouTube videos do not a professional at-home circumcisionist make....

There Were No Fans Or Cars In Attendance At This Incredible High School Dunk Contest
These are the highlights to the first-ever Ballislife All American Dunk Contest, which by our first appraisal seems more impressive than both the McDonald's contest and the one that featured Kias and choruses a few months ago. A few names here you can expect to see in next year's college rounds: A...

Deadspin I-Team: Who Is The Minor-League Hockey Forbidden Dancer?
A mere seven days ago, the existence of the Grand Rapids Griffins rail-dancing fan was confirmed. Today, tipster Chad sends footage taken from another angle of the spasmodic bit of body expression which puts everything into a wee bit more perspective. To wit:...

In Vanderbilt Golf's Defense, They Were Probably Acting Like Nashville's Collegiate Golfers Do Everyday
Oh look, the Vanderbilt golf team tried to one-up the prancing baseball players with a video blending bromanish posture and the witticism of an Old Spice commercial knock-off. Totally works. (Not a real sport! Get it?!)...

Go To Gelf's Varsity Letters Tonight And Listen To Great Boxing Writing
NYC folks: Gelf's Varsity Letters free reading series returns tonight, with boxing writing from Thomas Hauser, George Kimball, and Gary Andrew Poole. Head to Le Poisson Rouge on Bleecker Street at 7:30. It will, as usual, be le great. [Gelf]...

We Can Infer From This Video That Heidi Watney Does Not Like Her Food Fried
Baseball's on-field reporters, much like NBA's sideline reporters, are often sent to ask asinine questions and do asinine things on camera. It's a part of the job. Today in Cleveland, as the Sox did indeed crawl their way into an 0-6 start, NESN sent Heidi Watney to try Progressive Field's chicken...

If Boston Gets Swept By Cleveland Today, Red Sox Nation May Implode
The Red Sox, predicted by many to win it all this year, are still without a win five games into the season. Naturally, there's a discussion board up on the Globe website today titled "Panic Time?" Is it? Last night against Cleveland, Kevin Youkilis attempted to intentionally drop a line drive to tur...

Real Men Support The Cleveland Indians By Kissing One Another On Live Television
Your morning roundup for April 7, the day that attempted courtroom eye-gouging became a no-no....

In Vanderbilt Baseball's Defense, They Were Probably Trying To Be Funny
If what College Baseball Daily says is true, five members of the Vanderbilt University baseball team donned white tight and lisps to promote the school's Black and Gold Banquet. Oh. I get it....

Kyrie Irving Ignores Obnoxious Dookie Letter, Chooses To Enter NBA Draft
Alert the Dookies: independent, self-acting human Kyrie Irving has elected to enter the NBA Draft, coach Mike Krzyzewski announced today. The freshman guard was not swayed by sarcasm. We just hope he heeds Drew's request for his departing act. [GoDuke.com]...

The Epic Story Of A New Jersey Prosecutor Who Stole My Idea And Made Fantasy Baseball History
"I got Rickey Henderson and Roger Clemens."...

This "He Said, She Said" Trial Involving An Ex-NL West Outfielder Is Getting Weird
Of course, we're talking about the palimony case of Olvera v. [Brian] Giles. What did you think we were talking about? Giles' ex-girlfriend is suing him for $10 million that he allegedly promised her after their breakup....

Watch Andruw Jones Get Hit With A Bunch Of Onion Rings
Sweet justice for all those Braves and Dodgers fans who watched Jones pork up while on big contracts. And Jones says, "Sweet justice? I wanted sweet relish!" Twins win, 5-4, in extras, after Rafael Soriano and co. offered the first of many delightful late-inning implosions to come this season. [Vi...

Apply Within To Become The Next Head Coach Of Princeton Men's Basketball
Sydney Johnson, who coached Princeton to victory over Harvard in the game of the century, and then hung tight with Kentucky in the first round of March Madness, took the head coach job at Fairfield University today. You may see the irony there, since it's usually Princeton that poaches faculty at th...

No One Is Going To Cleveland Indians Games
On Friday, Cleveland opened its season on the losing end of a slugfest with the White Sox. Not the worst opening day possible, however much air Fausto Carmona's 3-inning, 10-run performance sucked out of the building—catching stud Carlos Santana went 3 for 5 with a homer....

We Were All Waiting For Choir Girls To Harmonize About Derrick Rose's MVP Season To Make It Official
Derrick Rose has officially gotten the "Lexy and Stephany" treatment, and so now is as good a time as any to acknowledge the man who will very likely be named the NBA's 2010-2011 MVP. If there's any sign that you've "made it," this isn't it, but it is a nice gesture nonetheless. We're harboring a ...