and Page 1064 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Brady Quinn's Cleveland Home On The Market
Well, not technically Cleveland, because no self-respecting athlete actually lives in Cleveland. But this 4-bedroom, 5-bath listing might be a sign that Quinn will soon be plying his trade a lot farther away. [Realtor.com via WaitingForNextYear]...

Lisa Guererro Reveals Hotels Are Still More Than Willing To Help Out Prospective Peepers
The former NFL sideline something or other decided to stay in the Vanderbilt Marriott to see if hotel security's tightened since EA's incident. Nope. [Inside Edition via The Big Lead]...

Queering In The Press Box
Michael Silver: "By midway through the third quarter ... I was ready to take the Atlanta Falcons quarterback up to Gavin Newsom's box on the west side of the stadium and ask the San Francisco mayor to marry us." [Yahoo!]...

Josh McDaniels Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Josh McDaniels, who won the weekend by proving that he's not a foolishly incompetent man-child. Yes, the bar was set pretty low....

When The Bands Are More Competitive Than The Football Teams
The epic Grambling State and Prairie View rivalry was taken to absurd new heights last week, as each team's marching band attempted to disrupt the other team's offense. Seriously, this is the most exciting story on SWAC football in years....

Randy Hanson Worked For The Raiders And Lived To Tell The Tale. Barely.
"From my blindside, Tom Cable threw me from my chair and into a piece of furniture that a lamp sat upon. He was screaming, ‘I'll f—- kill you! I'll f—- kill you!'." [Yahoo!]...

Was This A Missed Field Goal?
Cleveland Browns defensive coordinator Rob Ryan is making a big, passive-aggressive stink about the 31-yard kick you see here, the Bengals' game-winner over the Browns on Sunday. Alleged game-winner....

George Lopez Is This Year's Frank Caliendo
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

NFL Highlight Of The Week: Touchdown, Big Boy
Because the NFL has such a stingy rebroadcast policy, we've decided to recreate the week's best highlight using a white gerbil, a tree frog and actual game audio. Suspend disbelief....

Wide Receiver Drama Over: Braylon Edwards Traded, Michael Crabtree Signs
Adam Schefter woke up early today and jumped on two stories that will disappoint fans of ridiculous melodrama. Now that the Braylon Edwards saga is over in Cleveland and Michael Crabtree has ended his holdout, what will we talk about?...

NFL Players' Softer Sides Are Just As Dumb
Disclosure: thanks to a friend in editorial, I'm often one of the anonymous guys in the "men tell you what they really want" articles at Cosmo. That's my excuse for knowing that this month's issue features some football players....

ESPN The Mag's Nudie Issue Has Finally Arrived
After months of speculation about which athletes would bravely reveal themselves sans clothing for ESPN's "Body" issue, the hard-heads at Belsky headquarters have finally leaked some of the covers all over the internet....

Michael David Barrett Gets A Little Shovey
Alleged EA peeper makes it through the camera throngs successfully but not before he pushes one out of the way before he can speed off in his Ford Mustang. He must feel so violated. [NBC Chicago via Bob's Blitz]...

Raiders-Texans Game Is An Excellent Place To Take A Nap
A bored Raiders fan gets sleepy at Reliant Stadium and Houstonians take surprisingly good care of him. If this had happened at the Coliseum his homemade face tattoos would still be healing. [Photo via Texans Bull Pen, via FanHouse]...

Erin Andrews' Alleged Peeper, In The Flesh
Presenting Michael David Barrett, freshly outfitted with an electronic ankle monitor and no longer just a hastily drawn cartoon to us. He made a beeline for his car, evidently displeased with all those prying cameras. [Sportress of Blogitude, Chicago Tribune]...

Michael David Barrett Gets Home Confinement, Nifty Courthouse Sketch
The accused Erin Andrews peeper was ordered confined to his home in suburban Chicago. A judge barred him from using the Internet at home or work. That's him in the orange, showing no remorse for having made Patch Adams. [Sun-Times]...

Zombie Pat Tillman Would Be Playing For Bill Belichick Right Now, Peter King Reports
In March 2003, the United States embarked on a misbegotten and illegitimate war in Iraq that would have profound and sadly irrevocable consequences on ... the 2005 NFL free-agent market. So says Peter King....

Braylon Edwards Accused Of Punching FOL (Friend Of LeBron) UPDATED
Well, the Browns' season just got a whole lot better. Their "star" wide receiver was accused of punching a man last night and the victim says it's all because Braylon Edwards isn't as popular as LeBron James....

The Continued Dissemination Of TMZ's Erin Andrews Heroism
This is still bothering me, obviously, and in order to sate my tin-foil sleazeball conspiracies, I'm publishing an email sent to me in order to corroborate my post that TMZ's coverage of the Erin Andrews peepholery was a little sketch....