and Page 1091 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Andy Phillips Assures Everyone That He's Not The Carl Pavano/Greg Dobbs/John Cena Impersonator
"Anyone who knows me knows I would never have been involved in anything remotely close to something like that." [Pirates Report]...

Revisiting Jeff Reed's Paper Towel Freakout: An Investigative Report
You're probably thinking to yourself, "Hey, did they ever fix the towel dispenser that Jeff Reed broke?" That or you were thinking of pie. Quite often it's pie....

Spike Lee Will Help Out On Double-Teams Whenever He Can
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Some Spring Training News That Really Isn't News
In a development absolutely no one could have predicted, the Indians' Kerry Wood may miss some time with a sore back. [Cleveland Plain Dealer]...

An Entirely New Reason To Want To Leave Cleveland
Now Browns' defensive tackle Shaun Rogers wants to be traded because Eric Mangini passed him in the training room and didn't say hello. [NFL.com]...

25 Random Things About Rick Reilly. Really.
Rick Reilly detests blogs, but loves Facebook apparently. Oh, and posting on his own blog (not a blog!) "Go Fish" where he publishes "occasional and random mind dumps from the brain of Rick Reilly."...

Randy Johnson Will Still Put A Ball In Your Neck If You Test Him
"In Johnson's first throwing session against Giants hitters on Saturday, his new teammates took a few too many pitches for his taste. Unabashedly incensed, Johnson grumbled afterward, 'Swing the stinking bat!' [NY TIMES]...

Maryland Would Like To Know If Duke Has Prince Albert In A Can
Jokesters on a Maryland message board posted the phone number of the hotel that Duke's hoops team was staying in last night and the results were a sad indictment of the current state of college pranks....

Sorry, Guys. Marko Jaric Is Officially Off The Market
News of the nuptials between Memphis Grizzlies guard Marko Jaric and his Brazilian model-chick, Adriana Lima, spread like herpes from a beer pong tournament this morning. Never underestimate the power of a poorly groomed mustache....

The Washington Capitals Do It For The Ladies
Hey, Girls! Do you and the gals love to gab about hockey at your slumber parties? Because the Capitals would love to see a few extra broads in the seats at their next home game....

Two-Handed Bowler Will Save His Sport ... Or Destroy It
A rogue Australian criminal has adapted an ancient childhood secret that is completely revolutionizing professional bowling. All he had to do was ask—what if I used two hands?...

Andy Phillips And The Bizarre Porn Star Police Report
Former Yankee prospect Andy Phillips is considered one of the nicest family men in all of baseball by other writers and his peers. So why has an adult actress filed a police report against him?...

We'll Be Back With The Padres' 2009 Season After This Brief Message From Trevor Hoffman
It doesn't have the craftsmanship of the CC Sabathia ad in the Cleveland Plain Dealer — what glorious fonts! — but Trevor Hoffman's farewell manifesto in the San Diego Union Tribune is pretty cool nonetheless....

Nate Robinson Is Cal Naughton Jr.
So the Knicks' Nate Robinson apparently has some sort of man-crush on Will Ferrell, and I guess who can blame him? I mean, have you seen Elf?...

Northeastern's Brian Mandeville Had A Rough Combine
The good news: Despite playing for a weak small school program, you've been invited to the NFL combine! The bad news: The combine shows that you should never have been allowed on a football field....

Andre Smith's Hobbies Include Setting Large Piles Of Money On Fire
The puzzling story of Andre Smith, the University of Alabama's ready-made NFL lineman, continues to frustrate and infuriate NFL Combine geeks who are incensed at Smith's inability to play nicely....

Fifty Ways To Lose Your NBA Game
Dwyane Wade's career-high 50 points help Heat clobber Magic in ... wait, Miami lost by 23? Ouch. [Miami Herald]...

There Are No Alligator Wrestlers In Cleveland's Locker Room
David Dellucci told some beat writers he hurt himself wrestling an alligator. Some of them actually believed him. [Cleveland Plain Dealer]...

Shooting's A Sport, Right?
I mean, if biathlon is an Olympic sport, then surely this counts as sport-related. I have no idea where or why this video exists, but it does and we are all better for it....

The Montreal Canadiens Need To Find Better Friends
The 100th season of the Montreal hockey club has had ups and downs, but it's not clear yet where "finding out two of your players are mobbed up" falls on the spectrum of season highlights....