and Page 537 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Éric Abidal Denies Claim That Barcelona Bought Him A Black-Market Liver
Former Barcelona defender Éric Abidal has denied that his old club president bought him an illegal liver for a transplant he had in 2012, after a report from the Spanish paper El Confidencial cited recorded conversations submitted in court implying that this was the case....
England Miraculously Avoid Pulling An England By Beating Colombia In Penalty Shootout
Coming into the knockout rounds, everything was lined up perfectly for England to make their deepest World Cup run in generations. Naturally, this set a countervailing force in motion, one that would see England do what they always do and choke in hilariously heartbreaking fashion. During today’s En...
Sweden Edge Switzerland In Contest Of Who Sucks Less At Kicking The Ball
Sweden and Switzerland combined to sully what has been an amazingly entertaining World Cup with a total borefest today that did little more than solidify how, without expertise at the apparently arcane art of kicking the ball good, soccer can sort of suck. Sweden won by a score of 1-0. Too bad both ...
What Are You Swinging At, Sandy?
Max Scherzer’s slider is pretty dang good, but he doesn’t deserve too much credit for this swing and miss from Red Sox catcher Sandy Leon. Whether Leon took his eye off the ball or suddenly believed the strike zone was in his pants, you can’t embarrass yourself at the plate much more than this....
Thai Youth Soccer Team Found Alive After Being Lost In A Cave For Nine Days
After a complicated days-long rescue mission, divers on Monday found 12 boys from a Thai soccer team and their coach. The group had been trapped in a cave in Northern Thailand for nine days....
Virtually No One In San Diego Is Listening To Sports Radio Goon Dan Sileo
You may ask, “Who is Dan Sileo?” Reader, you are lucky—and not alone. The ex-Miami Hurricanes football player and sports radio lunk, who has twice been fired for moronic remarks, is drawing in no listeners on the disastrous San Diego radio station 97.3 The Fan....
Huge Brawl Breaks Out During Australia-Philippines Basketball Game
A massive fight erupted during an Australia-Philippines basketball game today. When the dust settled, 13 players were ejected from the FIBA World Cup qualifier—four from Australia and nine from Philippines....
Dan Gilbert Wrote LeBron James A Goodbye Letter, And It's Not Insane This Time
A lot has changed in the eight(!) years since LeBron James left the Cavaliers for the first time. The huge production of the The Decision was replaced with a grammatically suspect tweet. Cleveland has a championship. And Cavs owner Dan Gilbert, it seems, has grown out of Comic Sans....
Cursed Sentence: DeAndre Jordan Has Reached A Verbal Agreement To Sign With The Dallas Mavericks
Uh oh. DeAndre Jordan has reached “a verbal agreement” to sign with the Dallas Mavericks in free agency. That is a cursed sentence. We have entered “fool me twice” territory, here....
LeBronWatch: My SUPER CREDIBLE SOURCES Say He’s Going To L.A.
Are you ready for breaking LeBron Watch news that will absolutely BLOW YOUR NUTS OFF UNLESS YOU HAVE ALREADY WISELY FIGURED OUT THAT THINGS WERE ALREADY HEADED THIS WAY? Good, because I have such news. Now listen, I know my track record predicting things is, uh, not exactly sterling here. But tonigh...
LeBronWatch: LeBron Hunkers Down In "Decision Cave" In The Caribbean
LeBron James deposited the Cavaliers (and probably the Rockets) in the trash can this morning and will become an unrestricted free agent, so expect LeBronWatch comes to a frenzied, frothy climax over the next few days. Leave it to the very frothiest, ESPN’s Brian Windhorst, to report that LeBron Ja...
The American Who Briefly Got Ireland To Love Basketball Is Looking For A Storybook Ending
On Thursday, the national basketball team of Ireland beat Andorra, 63-56, to stay alive in FIBA’s European Championship for Small Countries, held all week in Serravalle, San Marino....
LeBronWatch: LeBron Officially A Free Agent
Folks, the thing all savvy LeBron Watchers knew was coming has indeed occurred. LeBron James has spiked the city of Cleveland back into the rubbish bin:...
England Score Big Win By Losing To Belgium
In today’s crucial group stage match between England and Belgium, the Brits narrowly managed to come out on top by coming out on bottom of a hard-fought 1-0 loss. With this phenomenal loss, England won entry to the much weaker side of the knockout round bracket, and now have a clear lane to the Worl...
Both England And Belgium Have Every Reason To Lose Tomorrow
England and Belgium will meet tomorrow at Kaliningrad Stadium in a match that will decide which team will win Group G. Both teams have scored eight goals and conceded two in a matched pair of blowout wins against Panama and Tunisia. This means that if they draw tomorrow, they will have identical goa...
The Cotton Candy Hot Dog Will Kill Us All
If you haven’t eaten breakfast or lunch yet today, it may be exceedingly difficult to do so now. Over the weekend, the Erie Seawolves, the Double-A affiliate of the Detroit Tigers, unveiled a special product for their Sugar Rush Night. It is the kind of special anti-treat that you will never be able...
Randal Grichuk Pulled A Reverse Bartman On A Potential Game-Tying Homer<em></em>
With the tying Astros run at the plate in the bottom of the ninth, a long fly ball to right from George Springer was utterly robbed of dinger status by the vertical leap of Randal Grichuk. In preserving the Toronto lead, Grichuk thwarted not only the whole Houston team, but also a young Blue Jays fa...
Iranian Goalie Who Exposed Ronaldo As A Fraud Went From Being A Homeless Runaway To The World Freaking Cup
Portugal was denied the full three points in their 1-1 draw against Iran today, thanks in massive part to a save from Iranian goalkeeper Alireza Beiranvand on a Cristiano Ronaldo penalty kick. Ronaldo, who failed to score today, was newly exposed as a massive fraud when his attempt at a powerful sho...
LeBronWatch: Podcast Guest Thinks LeBron Has Narrowed It Down To Three Teams
LeBron James has until Friday to decide whether to opt in to the last year of his contract with the Cavaliers, or decline it and become an unrestricted free agent. As previous LeBronWatch entries have noted, LeBron plans to sign with the Lakers, Cavaliers, Nuggets, and Knicks next season, and he wil...
Panama Got Their Asses Kicked And Still Won
Expectations are everything at the World Cup. A narrow loss in the Round of 16 might be a generationally humiliating result for one team while being a heroic feat of determination and resolve for another, with the lines between the two being drawn based on what was expected from each team coming int...