anger Page 117 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Elijah Dukes Blends Right Into Dominican Baseball
If you thought Elijah Dukes would sit on his laurels and be happy with a first round SHOTY victory, then you sir, are a Rays fan praying to God he doesn't do anything stupid. Your prayers haven't been answered, but are very important to us and will be answered in the order they were received....
Those 30-Run Rallies Will Kill You Every Time
Little did you know that when you watched Maracaibo, Venezuela beat the Netherlands, 21-2 in the Little League World Series on Tuesday, that it wouldn't be the most embarrassing wipeout of week. Meet your 2007 Baltimore Orioles, who lost 30-3 to the Texas Rangers on Wednesday. For Texas, it was the...
Charlie Weis, Unsuccessful In Obese Litigation
Say what you will about Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis, but you can't say he isn't constantly charging forward. Whether it's recruiting, attacking a Cover 2 or, you know, gastric bypass surgery, the guy makes up his mind and just GOES FOR IT, MAN. Suck Off The Fat Like A Champion. Unfortunately, such...
When Yankees Fans Attack ...
As if trying to keep your eyes peeled for foul balls — and flying rabbits! — wasn't enough to worry about at live sporting events, now we have to worry about drunk, rolling Yankees fans, too? But I only have two eyes!...
A Bug's Life, If That Bug Is Named John Holmes
The world has long pined for the answer to life's perpetual mystery: Is a Rangers-Orioles game more boring than watching flies screw? Well, an astute reader and his friend attended such a baseball game last night, and saw two horseflies gettin' down and procreating. Judging by these two fans' fixat...
Come Celebrate An Old Man's Victory Lap
Not that any of you were wondering, but this is clearly why Sammy Sosa came back after "retiring:" He gets to make this ridiculous face in front of a stadium full of fans who still aren't quite sure what to think of him....
Baseball Remains Very Good To Sammy Sosa
As the last smidgen of interleague play fades from our consciousness — and we'll never forget that magical June of 2007! — we lament, for a moment, that tonight's Rangers-Cubs game will be played in Arlington rather than at Wrigley. We would love to see how Sammy Sosa's homecoming to the Friendly Co...
Elijah Dukes Continues To Bat 1.000
If you're a social worker who is considering a foster care applicaton, how could you not approve the couple who is related to Elijah Dukes? A 17-year-old girl who is in foster care with a relative of Dukes told the Tampa police that Dukes got her pregnant. The article goes on to say that Dukes will ...
Michael Bloomberg Cannot Be Bothered With Your 'Hockey'
Let it be known that Michael Bloomberg is a serious man with many important papers on his desk, and that his office has wood paneling and various brass fixtures. This leaves him little time for traditional sports wagers with other, lesser mayors....
MSG Pulling No Punches In Dance Skater Lawsuit
You might remember, from a while back, a lawsuit involving Madison Square Garden and former Rangers City Skater Courtney Prince, who claims she was fired for reporting a sexual harassment with a Garden employee. (The employee tried to talk Prince into having a threesome, which, somehow, didn't work....
Let's Celebrate A Resurrection
The resurrection of Christ is being celebrated everywhere today (my apologies for violating the separation of church and Deadspin, especially to the many Deadspin readers who are proud, Godless heathens), so I thought we'd go in a different direction here and celebrate a couple of other equally-impo...
The Rangers Spit On Cute Girls
When there's a commercial break — yes, the NHL has sponsors! Pipe down, you! — the New York Rangers Islanders have Ice Girls clean up loose ice around the goal. They're young and cute and the fans like them, because fans like young and cute girls who are on ice....
Your AL West "Preview"
All right, last one of the day until tomorrow ... we think this is actually the easiest division to pick, which is why, obviously, we're going to have it entirely wrong....
Baseball Season Preview: Texas Rangers
You might remember, from back at the beginning of the NFL season, when we previewed each team by having a writer we liked write about their favorite team....
Looking Back At Sosa's Halcyon Days Of Yesteryear
Among the worthless — but muscular! — heap of relics from the 1998 Mark McGwire-Sammy Sosa home run chase? The priceless Slammin' Sammy: The Sammy Sosa Story, an animated "feature" about Sammy Sosa and "how a hero became a legend."...
Another Reason Baseball Players Shouldn't MySpace
This is CJ Wilson, a reliever for the Texas Rangers, an up-and-comer, a LOOGY, if you will. He also has a MySpace page and is pals with teammate Brandon McCarthy, who also has a MySpace page. They're buddies, along with, as always, an endless supply of buxom blondes who write things like "p.s. you k...
Albert Belle, Still Available
It's official, folks, if you can handle it: Sammy Sosa and the Texas Rangers have agreed on a deal. Sosa will receive $500,000 on a one-year contract and will be invited to make the team out of Spring Training. It's good to see that the new Rangers manager Ron Washington is attempting to be realisti...
PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands
A few people out there have wondered if the entirely reasonable and in no way dramatically and insanely overstepping in the name of a somewhat noble (occasionally) cause folks at PETA have an opinion on David Stern's decision to be with leather again. Well, they do....
Scoop Jackson And (Someone Else's) Orange Roundie
Let's say, hypothetically speaking, that, oh, Mike Lupica wrote a story for Esquire in which he discussed a concept he had discovered "on the Internet" called "The Ewing Theory." He then wrote a whole 4,000-word piece in which he borrowed heavily from the "Internet concept," but never actually men...