ann Page 185 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Of All The Signs Baseball Season Has Arrived, This Is The Best Damn One
Vin Scully launched his 63rd season behind the mic for the Dodgers yesterday, calling Los Angeles' 5-3 win over the Padres and looking damn good while doing it. While Scully will work fewer games this season, his consistent presence in the late hours (for those of us on the east coast) is like a wa...

Here's What Kentucky's Championship Celebration Sounded Like Over The Lexington Police Scanner
If you weren't tuned in to the Lexington Police Department's radio scanner last night, you missed out on a wild world of sports celebrations that ranged from the violent to the perverse. (The #LexingtonPoliceScanner Twitter hashtag alone was trending worldwide, at one point.) We recorded the whole ...

The Fray's Pre-NCAA Title Game National Anthem Performance Was ... Different
While nowhere near as bad as any that made our suggestions for the Worst National Anthem Ever (indeed, if you caught Monica's tone-deaf rendition Saturday, you know it wasn't even the worst of the Final Four) The Fray's attempt at a hipster version of Marvin Gaye's "Star-Spangled Banner" fell awfu...

High School Girl Charged With Assault After Brutal Soccer Beatdown
Throw out the formalities when Lewisville and Chester get together, that's what I always say. The South Carolina schools met for a women's soccer match Monday evening, and it ended with the police being called. That New Mexico-BYU game has nothing on this one....

Watching This 86-Year-Old Gymnast Will Make You Feel Lazy And Old
That's Johanna Quaas displaying much grace and skill in a demonstration performance of the floor routine at last week's World Gymnastics Championships in Cottbus, Germany. She's 86, and she's also quite adept on the parallel bars. I got winded walking up the steps to get to the office today....

Danny Ainge Says The Celtics Sometimes "Look Like We Are Jurassic Park"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Ainge means they're old, not that they can open doors....

Nike Wins: Tim Tebow Jets Jerseys Are Now Illegal
Yesterday, Nike filed a lawsuit against Reebok, demanding they cease selling the Tim Tebow Jets jerseys they had rushed into production after Tebow was traded to New York. Last night a judge granted Nike a temporary restraining order, meaning you cannot legally buy a Tim Tebow Jets jersey anywhere r...

Commenters: You Need To Convert Your Accounts Right Now
Have you heard about the new "arm the peasants and redistribute the land" commenting regime taking hold here in the very near future? Well, Phase 1—converting your commenting account to third-party authentication—begins this morning. Perhaps you have some questions....

We'll Pay For Video Of Dana Jacobson Chugging Vodka From The Bottle And "Cursing Like A Sailor"
Yesterday, upon hearing the news that Dana Jacobson intends to leave ESPN, we hoped to pay our respects by posting a video clip of our favorite moment from her time in Bristol. Alas, actual footage of Jacobson chugging vodka from the bottle and "cursing like a sailor," in the words of the Press of A...

Deadspin Is Looking For Summer Interns
Edit: We are no longer accepting applications for this position. Thank you for your interest....

How The Broncos Got Peyton Manning
It came down to Arizona, Tennessee and Denver. Those three teams, sans Miami, that everyone expected to be on Peyton Manning's radar were the three finalists in Manning's search for a new team. Manning wanted a chance to win, but more than that, he wanted to go where he would have friends. Ken Whise...

Bristolmetrics: Dick Vitale Said "Baby" A Mere 14 Times On <em>SportsCenter</em> Last Week
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenterthroughout the week. Graphic by Jim Cooke....

Pat Robertson: Because The Broncos Disrespected Tebow, They Deserve A Peyton Injury
Robertson, appearing on some talky-talky show today, decided that "it would serve the Broncos right" if Peyton Manning was incapacitated by that neck injury. What did they (and he) ever do to deserve that? They treated Tim Tebow "shabbily." In that justification, there's no mention of Jesus, but: Je...

Obituary For Dead Broncos Fan Says He Hated Peyton Manning And "Wanted Out Before A Deal Was Done"
Jim Driver died on Monday, the same day Peyton Manning agreed to terms with Denver. Driver, 1933-2012, led an interesting life. He was a Navy photographer in the Korean War, transferred from Santa Clara Community College because "the curriculum was too liberal," and spent his later years teaching ch...

Quarterback Musical Chairs Leaves The Dolphins Standing Alone In A Corner
The Miami Dolphins do not have a quarterback, and now there are no good quarterbacks left....

Peyton Manning Will Throw For 4,400 Yards, 32 Touchdowns Next Season, Says Science
Fantasy whiz Nik Bonaddio, proprietor of sports analytics firm numberFire, has weighed in with the first realistic prognostication of what fantasy players might expect from Manning, provided his surgically fused neck can hold up to the rigors of a full 16-game NFL season....

The Broncos Should Trade Tim Tebow To Every Other Team In The NFL (Unless They Keep Him), According To Internet
Peyton Manning is a Bronco now, meaning Tim Tebow is trade bait. Which NFL team should part with their 30 pieces of silver (and maybe a fifth-round draft pick) to bring Tebowmania to town? The Internet has given this question careful consideration and furnished us with an answer: every team. ...

Comments Of The Fortnight-Ish: Srsly?
To kick off today's discussion, here are two exceptionally great, fairly recent comments for you to examine:...

When You Get Knocked Out By A Flying Knee Like This, People Think You Pooped Your Pants
The stinky rumor floating around the internet is that Vitor Vianna lost control of his bowels after taking this picture-perfect flying knee from Brian Rogers during a quarterfinal fight of a Bellator middleweight tournament. Whatever. We've all soiled the silk before, usually without the excuse of...

Bristolmetrics: The Week We Watched ESPN Savor Its Own Farts With "Peytonology"
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenterthroughout the week. Graphic by Jim Cooke....