ant Page 668 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Summer Is The Goddamn Worst
May has started, which means that we're quickly running out of May and I don't want May to end because that means summer is here and OH FUCK GOD PLEASE NOT AGAIN....

Bruce Bochy Just Can't Bear To Watch Anymore
These are down days in The City, with Pablo Sandoval out for weeks after hand surgery, Willie Mota busted for drugs, and a defense that's let down every pitcher on the staff....

Cubs Ballgirl Caught On Camera Writing Note Was Rejecting Fan's Request For Her Phone Number
The video you see above made its way around the internet in recent days, and had even been sent to us by a handful of tipsters. All we knew was what we saw: A ballgirl at Wrigley Field filling out a note and handing it to a ballpark attendant. Naturally, an expert (read: Cubs broadcaster Bob Brenl...

Before Steve Kerr Sends 19-Year-Old Players Back To College, He Should Try Some Academic Research Himself
Former NBA star Steve Kerr penned a lengthy, multi-sectioned argument in Grantland this week in which he not only defends the NBA's current ban on players under age 19 but pushes for the minimum age to be raised to 20. Forcing young people to spend more time as scholar-athletes, according to Kerr, ...

Greg Oden Says He Became An Alcoholic, Got Offers To Work In Porn
Mark Titus has a piece over at Grantland that offers a "rare and candid" look at the reclusive Greg Oden, who was finally released by the Trail Blazers in March after five seasons marked mostly by injuries. Titus, who writes about his basketball experiences on his blog, Club Trillion, acknowledges u...

Everybody Loved Grantland
Excerpted from Over Time: My Life as a Sportswriter....

Down And Out In Baseball's Indie Leagues; Or, What Made Tommy John Want To Rake The Infield?
A dispatch from our correspondent with the Bridgeport Bluefish, an unaffiliated team in the Atlantic League....

Rajon Rondo Angrily Confronts TNT Cameraman For Filming Him As He Stood There
Rough evening last night for Rajon Rondo: He made a terrific defensive play in the waning seconds, only to dribble the ball off his foot as the horn sounded. Afterward, TNT did one of those harmless hallway shots, which pissed Rondo off. And then Charles Barkley made fun of Rondo's wardrobe. Yeah...

The First Jose Canseco Joke Known To Mankind
It's easy to forget that Jose Canseco used to be a baseball player of some distinction and not just a social media punchline. Which got us thinking, how long has this been going on? When did the tide start to turn against the Worcester Tornadoes' newest outfielder?...
![And Here's A Woman Stumbling Out Onto The Court During Tonight's Nuggets-Lakers Playoff Game [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
And Here's A Woman Stumbling Out Onto The Court During Tonight's Nuggets-Lakers Playoff Game [UPDATE]
We're used to our idiots on the field being male and at baseball games, but stereotypes be damned! We had a woman try to join the action in Denver tonight as the Nuggets and Lakers wound down the first half of their Game Four matchup. ...

Eli Manning Has A Banana For A Penis
Eli Manning's appearance hosting Saturday Night Live last night was passable, lacking any real groaner moments but nothing especially memorable, either. Well, except for Manningbananapenis....

This 10-Year-Old Girl Can Squat More Than A Woman Four Times Her Age
Here’s a terrifying little slice of American pie from the Newark Star-Ledger:...

University Of Texas Student Gets Hit By Bus, Survives
On the last day of classes every semester, the University of Texas holds a foam sword fight along Guadalupe Street, the Austin campus's main drag. It's one of those silly traditions that's said to be a way for college kids to "blow off steam" even though they likely partied more than they studied ...

Gregor Blanco Fall Down, Go Boom, Still Makes It To Third Base
Gregor Blanco has just 27 stolen bases in some 271 career games, so we wouldn't say that he's necessarily known for his speed on the basepaths....
![There Was An Extra Tool In Today's Braves Tool Race, And This One Got Arrested [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
There Was An Extra Tool In Today's Braves Tool Race, And This One Got Arrested [UPDATE]
Like most ballparks, Turner Field hosts a silly race between costumed characters that represent some sponsoring interest. In the Braves' case, it's the Home Depot Tool Race. Today's Tool Race featured an extra competitor, a fan who raced in from center field and made it to the infield before being...

Brian McCann Hit A Grand Slam Off Roy Halladay, Got Bopped In The Face By A Teammate As Reward
Last night's 15-13 extra innings Braves win over the Phillies game was weird. For one, it's the second-most runs ever allowed in a game started by Roy Halladay. (The record is 17, per commenter below.) Halladay also gave up a grand slam to Atlanta's Brian McCann, the first such homer since Evan Lon...

Holy Crap, Jeremy Affeldt's Son Is Huge
Giants lefty specialist Jeremy Affeldt suffered another freak injury on Saturday, spraining his MCL. He's now on the 15-day disabled list. That's not the story here. This is:...

Atlanta Hawks Fans Are Not The Most Welcoming
Unlike many of my esteemed Deadspin colleagues, I am not blessed to live the Big Apple, a city of vogue fashion and style. The only reason I recognize the Chanel logo on this Hawks fan's bizarre t-shirt is because my grandmother has worn Chanel No. 5 for 60 years and we buy it for her every Christm...

You Can Lead A Baseball Fan In A Horse Mask To Beer, But You Can't Make Him Drink It
This video has nothing to do with ESPN, Sarah Phillips, or parody Twitter accounts. It has everything to do with baseball, beer, and horses. You know, the important stuff....

Manu Ginobili Tries To Dunk From One Step Inside Foul Line, Fails Miserably
He did manage to successfully complete two other dunks during yesterday's win over the Jazz, but neither was as much fun to watch as this. [The Basketball Jones]...