are Page 179 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Re-Examining The Shotgun Formation
Castro Valley, Calif.'s reign as Deranged Youth Sports Capital of the U.S. lasted exactly 24 hours. Today Philadelphia wrestles away the title with determination and panache, as one of its wonderfully colorful youth football parents sets the bar impossibly high. Let's look in, shall we?...
Swiftboat Veterans For Truth In Girls High School Basketball
Welcome to Castro Valley, Calif., home of former MLB All-Star Ed Sprague, Jacksonville Jaguars head coach Jack Del Rio and Lord of the Rings special effects supervisor Randy Cook. If planning to visit, please be advised that many of the adults there are several different kinds of crazy....
Does This Mean The Curse Is Back On?
It's our sad duty to report that Nelson de la Rosa, who was known as the world's smallest actor and who was a friend of pitcher Pedro Martinez, has died at the age of 38, of unknown causes. De la rosa had just arrived in the U.S. from Chile to visit relatives. The 2-foot-4 de la Rosa had become kn...
See, This Is How It Works ... HUGH!
Former "Major League" "player" Mark Littell has designed himself a new piece of baseball equipment, and hey, we're proud of ya, Mark....
Behold The Glory That Is Gilbert
In case you had any doubt that Wizards superstar Gilbert Arenas is the most subtly weirdo human in sports right now, DC Sports Bog invites you to check out this month's Esquire interview with Agent Zero himself. The level of pure oddity is pretty much off the charts. Some highlights, culled from DC ...
Soon, Congress Will Make The Wizards Illegal
If you haven't heard, the Washington Wizards' new slogan for the 2006-07 season is "Go All In," which is possibly a reference to Gilbert Arenas' love of playing online poker at halftime and is definitely not something that makes much sense. To quote DC Sports Bog:...
There's Always Room For Tasing!
We've had some rather thorough discussions of tasering and its effectivness and proper dispersal. But we never thought we'd see it come up at a youth football game....
Us Against The Music
Little housecleaning matter here: Tomorrow night, right before the Tigers begin securing their 2-0 ALDS lead on the Yankees — sorry — we will be reading things aloud. Using our voice, and perhaps some spackle....
Arenas Of The Absurd
We're rapidly coming to the point, we think, where we can place pictures of Gilbert Arenas and Michael Jackson side by side, and point to Arenas and say "He's the eccentric one." (Though Gilbert is decidedly more charming and, uh, a little less creepy, we think.) The latest out of Washington D.C. ...
In Hell, Mascots Look Like This
Hey, Euro 2008 officials have ripped off Woody Woodpecker! And made him gay! As The Mighty MJD mentioned over the weekend, Austria and Switzerland, co-hosts of Euro 2008, rolled out their new mascots on Sunday. The two countries had their finest cartoonists labor for more than two years to come up...
Emmitt Smith To Get Unexpected Competition On 'Dancing With The Stars'
Those suffering from persistent night terrors — frightening disorders of the sleep from the darkest corners of the psyche — should not watch the above video. We were deeply disturbed by it, and are now unable to eat, or dress ourselves to go out. We blame The Realests, which today links to an AOL Mi...
Aei! The Olympic Mascots Are Back! Run For Your Lives!
Like childhood night terrors or the career of George Michael, we thought that we were done with The Five Friendlies for good; or at least until the 2008 Olympics. But no dice. China trotted out their satanic mascot goblins once again on Sunday while announcing the China Bowl, an NFL exhibition set...
It's 3 1/2 In The Pokey For Clarett
Word just came in about an hour ago: Former Ohio State running back Maurice Clarett has pled guilty to two felonies and will spend at least the next 3 1/2 years in prison. Jury selection was about to begin in the case, but lawyers accepted the plea of 7 1/2 years, with the first parole opportunity p...
Kareem Takes A Large Dump On Someone Else's Lawn
If you needed another reason that the late Wilt Chamberlain was countless times more interesting than all-time scoring champ Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, we bring you this gossip item from today's New York Daily News....
Wheels Of Justice Grind Slowly For Clarett
The Maurice Clarett story, with its deep debts and Israel mobs and Grey Goose, has almost become too sad for us to take much joy in goofing on it anymore, though we're still always going to be a little tickled by the fact that he had a hatchet....
Who Can Make A Difference? Parents Like You
One just never knows what mayhem will erupt when the Redskins meet the Bears. Anything can happen ... um, did we mention that these Redskins and Bears are 12 years old? Proving that the ghost of Woody Hayes does indeed roam the earth looking for bodies to possess, an assistant youth football coach i...
Controversy Rocks The Little League World Series
It seems we have proven once again that, when it comes to baseball, you should probably take what we say and expect the exact opposite. The team from Columbus, Ga. beat Kawaguchi City, Japan, 2-1, on Monday to claim the Little League World Series title, as America finally exacts revenge for the Wo...
Len Pasquarelli Has Had Enough Of Your Silliness
We'd like to thank the folks at Pro Football Talk for finding this clip of ESPN.com's Len Pasquarelli appearing on Charlotte sports talk radio, on something called the "Penner and Mac Show." (Honestly, nobody in sports radio has ever been called by their full name; we're still waiting for "The Humbe...
Clarett Story Continues To Take Scary Turns
Say what you will about the kids at Bristol, but they continue to move the needle on all matters Maurice Clarett, at least. The network learned yesterday that Clarett, who has had a rough couple of weeks, was in deep to the Israeli mob, and that might have been the reason he was, you know, carrying ...
We're Only 99 44/100ths Percent Pure, Ourselves
The woman on the left in this photo is Danika Schroeter. She finished second in the Canadian downhill mountain biking championships last week, finishing just one second behind Michelle Dumaresq. Dumaresq is the woman in the middle. The lady on the right ... we don't know who the lady on the right is...