as Page 1034 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Watching The NBA Finals At Oracle Arena With The Overlords And Oligarchs In Club Prick
I watched Game 1 of the NBA Finals from extremely expensive seats in Oracle Arena, but I didn’t see J.R. Smith’s towering goof....
Giancarlo Stanton Blesses Bachelorette Party With Healthy Dong
Giancarlo Stanton viciously smote a poor baseball into the right field stands in Camden Yards Saturday, where it was gathered by the overjoyed members of a bachelorette party wearing “Team Bride” hats:...
J.R. Smith Is No Longer So Certain He Knew The Score
J.R. Smith was pretty clear after Game 1 that he knew the score and situation at the end of regulation, and that what appeared to be an all-time blunder was, in fact, a combination of team-wide confusion and a running clock. The play sure didn’t look that way, but that was his story and, honestly, i...
Max Scherzer Saves The Day With Timely Hitting, Wait What
It will mean absolutely nothing to you to be told that Max Scherzer was a key contributor in a narrow Nationals win over the Atlanta Braves Saturday night. No shit, he’s their best pitcher and their best player, you are saying to an indifferent computer screen, like a true online psycho. Oh ho! This...
Maybe It Actually Is Okay For Caps Fans To Believe?
The Caps were still up by a goal after Braden Holtby’s incredible blunder in the third period of Saturday’s Game 3, but when it happened—the very instant Tomáš Nosek guided Holtby’s blind, panicked, incomprehensibly ill-advised give-away into the empty net—a vision of the next great gut-wrenching Ca...
The Sixers Really Need To Fire Bryan Colangelo Right Now
It’s no secret that the Sixers plan to court all the premier free agents this summer. It is also no secret that LeBron James will be the premier free agent this summer, seeking a long-term contract after he opts out of the final year of his deal in Cleveland. With that in mind, I hereby present LeBr...
Gnarly Rougned Odor Takeout Slide Sparks Benches-Clearing Hullabaloo
Benches cleared for a bustling group therapy session after Rougned Odor tried and failed to break up a game-ending double play Friday night by sliding in wide and with his spikes up on the relay from Andrelton Simmons:...
Silly Baseball Goose Goes To Better Place
The silly goose that bonked itself to hell in Wednesday’s Angels-Tigers game has now supposedly been released into the scenic green wilderness of East Lansing, Michigan, after a brief stay at a veterinary hospital....
The Mavericks VP Accused Of Intimidating Employees And Ignoring Harassment Is No Longer In The Job
George Prokos, the vice president who oversaw the Dallas Mavericks’ ticket sales department—where ex-employees said their boss routinely screamed at and intimidated them, little was done to help a coworker in what appeared to be an abusive relationship with another team employee, and one employee be...
Don't Let J.R. Smith Distract You From JaVale McGee's Own Incredibly Funny Failure
An NBA Finals game featuring Nick Young, J.R. Smith, and JaVale McGee was always bound to be full of goofs and gaffes, and while everyone is justifiably mocking Smith for forgetting how time and numbers work, let us not forget that McGee had perhaps an even funnier botched play in the third quarter....
Let's Look At Bryan Colangelo's Collars
Today is Sixers GM Bryan Colangelo’s 53rd birthday, and also possibly his final day of running the team’s post-Process regime in the wake of a Ringer report that Colangelo or someone very close to him ran up to five anonymous Twitter accounts dedicated to defending Colangelo and attacking his numero...
Report: Senators Executive Arrested For Harassing Shuttle Bus Driver
Ottawa Senators assistant GM Randy Lee was arrested Thursday night in Buffalo for allegedly harassing a bus driver. The Associated Press first reported his arrest....
Danny Farquhar Gives First Interview Since Brain Hemorrhage
Here’s some nice news: White Sox reliever Danny Farquhar, who suffered a brain hemorrhage in the dugout during an April game, gave his first interview since returning home from the hospital. He sat down with Good Morning America on Friday to talk about his recovery for the first time, and while it’s...
So, Can LeBron Do That Four More Times?
J.R. Smith’s inexplicable game-ending dribbling demo is and should be the thing fans remember about Game 1 of these short-looking 2018 NBA Finals, but lost in all the hubbub around Smith’s all-time brain fart is that the Cavs absolutely should have won a road game against a Warriors team that really...
Draymond Green Is The Supreme Heel
Draymond Green burst some blood vessels in LeBron James’s left eye while barely making a play on the ball, causing it to glow red for the rest of the night. Draymond Green walked to the bench and called James a “fucking pussy.”...
Let's Remember Some Guys, Big Box Full Of Garbage, Volume III
You can’t really know what your life’s great work will be when you begin it. Our days are full to overfull with work, but so little of that feels important. This is not to say that all of it is bullshit, although for most everyone some significant portion of it is invariably bullshit. It’s just tha...
On Further Review, Video Review Ruined Game 1
The challenge is to leave aside, even if just for a second, the question of whether it actually, truly was a charge or a block....
J.R. Smith Claims He Knew The Score
I can’t know this, but I know it: LeBron James would’ve hit the buzzer-beater. ...
This Is How It Feels When You're The Only Good Player On An NBA Finals Team<em></em>
LeBron James turned in a heroic, 51-point performance in what came so close to becoming an incredible Game 1 victory for the Cavs. Instead, this might have been the worst night of LeBron’s basketball-playing life, with multiple tortuous twists combining for a nightmare loss....
That Was A Fucked Up Way For LeBron To Lose
In a neck-and-neck Game 1, it looked multiple times like the Cavs were going to steal a win on the road against the Warriors. After heading into the half all tied at 56, then weathering the Warriors’ trademark third-quarter onslaught, LeBron James gave his team the lead with under a minute to play o...