as Page 1685 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Comcast SportsNet Airs Our Version Of Cubs Mascot With Cock And Balls
Earlier this week we introduced you to terrifying Cubs mascot Clark The Cub and invited you to do horrible things to him. We started you off with Jim Cooke's full-frontal rendition, which is exactly what Comcast SportsNet Mid-Atlantic aired to viewers across the Washington, D.C. area tonight....

<em>R.B.I. Baseball</em> Is Returning This Spring
Rejoice! R.B.I. Baseball, the famed NES game (with a few sequels) will return this spring, thanks to MLB Advanced Media. ...

Major League Baseball's War On Drugs Is An Immoral Shitshow
Major league ballplayers should never have agreed to drug testing. They should have told any handwringing writer who had anything to say about it to fuck right off, and they should have said the same to any handwringing politician who wanted to do something about it. They should have made clear that...

The Path To Remaining Unbeaten In The NCAA This Year
Like most basketball fans, I enjoy close games. A contest featuring teams separated by one or two possessions late makes for enthralling theater. At the end of a tight game, every good decision and crucial mistake is amplified. Even the crowd feels like it wields more influence with time winding dow...

Potential Game-Winning Shot Sits On The Rim...<em>Forever</em>
This is Grandview (Wash.) trying to break a tie in the closing seconds of Saturday's game. Bryce Carpenter goes for the layup in transition, and hits only stasis....

Cubs Are Disappointed You Did Such Filthy Things To Their New Mascot
It's been a rough two days for Clark the Cub, the Chicago Cubs' dumb new mascot. We put a gross dick on him, and a lot of other people did some not-so-nice things to him as well. The Cubs have noticed all of this, and they are tired of all the tomfoolery....

The Night Sinatra And DiMaggio Heard Marilyn Was Humping Some Guy
Sixty years ago today, Joe DiMaggio married his girlfriend of two years, Marilyn Monroe. Here, the happy couple are seen leaving San Francisco's City Hall, site of their nuptials. It was a short-lived union: The two divorced in October of the same year....

Get Ready To Endure Bud Selig's Season-Long Victory Lap
Remember when Mariano Rivera turned the 2013 baseball season into a goodbye tour of sorts, and everyone loved it because Mo is one of the most universally admired baseball players in history? Well now you're going to hate it forever, because it set in motion the worst idea ever: a Bud Selig goodbye ...

A Brief History Of Terrible Chicago Mascots
The Chicago Cubs unveiled their new mascot yesterday to little acclaim. That's what happens when you create a mascot that looks like a nightmarish, perverted furry and lends itself to horrible Photoshop alterations. But Clark the Cub is just the latest in a long line of ill-advised Chicago mascots. ...

Dear Humans: Do Not Eat Pizza With Utensils
Hey, homo sapiens! Let us embark upon an expedition of the mind. A mindspedition! ...

LeBroning Is The New Thing All The Kids Are Doing
LeBron James is the best basketball player in the world, and he's also been known to flop from time to time. It's because of that second part that he's given birth to the latest sports-themed meme to sprout up on the internet: LeBroning. What is LeBroning? Take it away, kids!...

Scott Boras Says MLB's War On PEDs Is All Backwards
Baseball came down hard on Alex Rodriguez, seeking—and achieving--stacked suspensions for each violation of the joint drug agreement. But what if MLB is going about things all wrong? Scott Boras believes that to truly quash its drug problem, baseball needs to go after the dealers, not the users....

Here's Some Audio From Boomer Esiason's Stoned <em>MNF</em> Broadcast
Last week, we learned about the time Boomer Esiason and Matt Millen got contact high while doing a radio broadcast for a Monday Night Football game in December 2000. Yesterday, Boomer shared some of his marijuana-infused commentary from that game on his daily radio show....

Vintage Radio Broadcasts Of Baseball Games
Head on over to the Internet Archive and dig their selection of radio broadcasts of old baseball games. ...

Sadly, This Great Picture Of Ronaldo Stealing Messi's Girl Is Fake
Cristiano Ronaldo won his second Ballon d'Or yesterday, awarded to the year's best soccer player. He beat out Lionel Messi, who had won it four years in a row. Ronaldo's win was expected (though neither he nor Messi had each other in their top three), so the highlight of the gala was the above photo...

Mayor Of Ames, Iowa, Gets Bored Watching Other Mayor Of Ames, Iowa
Iowa State's men's basketball coach, Fred Hoiberg, is often referred to as The Mayor because of his popularity in town. He got some write-in votes for the actual mayoral race in 1993 and it's in his ISU bio and his Twitter handle. It's pretty official as nicknames go. ...
![Contest: Do Something Horrible To The Cubs' New, Perverted Mascot [NSFW?]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/19cgaod16qt14jpg.jpg)
Contest: Do Something Horrible To The Cubs' New, Perverted Mascot [NSFW?]
The Cubs' new mascot is a nightmarish, perverted furry, and it deserves to have horrible things done to it. Gawker art director Jim Cooke has already gotten this party started. Do your worst....

The Cubs' New Mascot Is A Nightmarish, Perverted Furry
In an apparent effort to get the public to stop paying so much attention to their tenuous connections to the traditional baseball experience and start paying more attention to them as a baseball team, the Chicago Cubs have spent the last while systematically eradicating everything that's even remote...

Robert Griffin III Has Had It With Fans Complaining About Dumb Things
The Skins QB has stayed largely silent since the end of the season—he's been around long enough to know that after a 3-13 season, you can't win no matter what you say. But on Friday he made a lengthy post on Facebook. On the face of it, it's a response to one stupid person complaining about the arm ...

Aston Villa's Nathan Baker Stretchered Off After Strike To The Face
Villa Park played host to a scary moment today as Aston Villa defender Nathan Baker had to be given oxygen on the pitch after catching an Arsenal strike square in the face....