as Page 1945 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
30 Paragraphs About 30 Teams From The Basketball Prospectus Guide To The Truncated NBA Season
The following is an abridged preview of an abridged NBA season, culled from the team chapters of the ever-incisive Pro Basketball Prospectus. Buy the book as a PDF for $9.98. ...
Drew Brees's Birthmark Must Be Contagious, Sean Payton Now Looks Symptomatic
Your morning roundup for Dec. 27, the day we learned Christmas lights have a final resting place. Photo via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Sean Williams Left It All On The Floor Tonight
The Mavericks' Sean Williams made the most of his 11 minutes in a 115-93 loss to Denver—the forward, who spent all of last season in the D-League, tallied 12 points—but it was his performance after returning to the bench that brought his teammates to their feet....
Gunman Decides Not To Rob The 76ers' Lou Williams, Lets Williams Take Him For Fast Food Instead
That's the story Williams told reporters in the locker room prior to tonight's season opener against the Trail Blazers in Portland, anyway. According to the Philadelphia Daily News, Williams said a man approached him as his car was stopped on a Philly street on Christmas Eve, knocked on the car's w...
Bryce Harper Named His New Puppy "Swag"
Did you know Nationals wundertool Bryce Harper protects his Tweets? Luckily, Nats Enquirer is here to relay to us that Harper received an adorable chocolate Lab for Christmas, and promptly named it Swag. They're totally off to the park to pick up chicks. [Nats Enquirer]...
Yorvit Torrealba Receives 66-Game Suspension For Slugging A Venezuelan League Umpire
The Rangers catcher's physically expressed frustration at a prior strike call earned him 66 games in Venezuelan winter ball, which is the rest of this season and all of next. We wonder how broken up he is about it, considering his son was kidnapped in his home country a few years back, and the wor...
Even Santa Claus, Drink In Hand, Heckled LeBron James On Christmas Day
Hey, he had worked his ass off the night before, and he was really looking forward to going to the Mavs' opener, what with it being a Finals rematch and all. Can you blame him for wanting to clean up his beard, kick back with a gin and tonic, and let off a little steam? [That NBA Lottery Pick]...
What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?
As in past years, the Sun Sentinel has created a searchable database of emergency room visits around the country. And as in past years, we have trolled the data for the finest examples of insertions showcasing extraordinarily bad luck and/or ingenuity. ...
A Directory Of Places Where You Can Watch Sports While Eating Chinese Food Today
Here is a very incomplete list of places in our great nation where you can watch sports while eating Chinese food today—as suggested by you, our readers. If you have more ideas, please let us know in the comments. All endorsements sic'd....
Brandon Jacobs To Rex Ryan: "It's Time To Shut Up, Fat Boy"
Eh, it just might be. Jets lost to Jacobs's Giants, 29-14. [via Mike Garafolo]...
Something Sent Huggy Bear Over The Edge [UPDATE]
We're still waiting for details, but after West Virginia's overtime loss to Baylor in Las Vegas, Mountaineers head coach Bob Huggins suddenly became enraged. We'll update the story when we get more info....
Yorvit Torrealba Spread The Holiday Spirit By Slugging A Venezuelan League Umpire
Rangers catcher Yorvit Torrealba is spending the offseason playing for his hometown Leones del Caracas of the Venezuelan League, and after missing badly for strike three took his frustrations out on the umpire in an ugly way. It was, if my Spanish is correct, one of two attacks on the home plate u...
There Are Blocked Shots, And Then There's What Florida's Patric Young Did To Florida State Last Night
The annual battle between Florida and Florida State cagers wasn't much of a fight (the Gators won handily) but it did bring us an early nominee for block of the year, a "YOINK!" of tremendous measure when Florida sophomore Patric Young elevated to rip the ball straight from layup-minded Seminole s...
The Dennis Erickson Era At Arizona State, Encapsulated In One Play
Arizona State fired head football coach Dennis Erickson almost a month ago, but allowed him to coach the team through the end of the season—including tonight's Las Vegas Bowl matchup against Boise State. If there's any play that demonstrates the futility of the Sun Devils under Erickson's tutelage...
Recruit Says Bruce Pearl Sent A Beautiful Girl To Tell Him To Attend Tennessee
Small forward Jordan Adams is one of the many prospects out of Oak Hill Academy, and ESPN has him ranked as the 50th best recruit in the nation. He's going to UCLA in the fall, but they weren't the only ones who were interested: Bruce Pearl, while still at Tennessee, apparently called in the service...
Readers: Tell Us Where To Watch Sports While Eating Chinese On Dec. 25
Christmas is on Sunday, and while most public activity shuts down so the Christians and semi-Christians can worship American consumerism and baby Jesus, our nation's Jews will be eating Chinese food and watching hoops like it's just another Hanukkah weekend. What a world!...
It's Going To Be A Long, Miserable Year For Kris Humphries
Kris Humphries's summer sideshow was entertaining but seemed ultimately irrelevant: his dalliances with Kim Kardashian and with reality TV were in the universe of entertainment and celebrity, not our sports universe. We'd get our jokes, E! gets their ratings, Humphries and the Kardashians make a q...
Dutch Cup Match Halted After Fan Attacks Opposing Goalkeeper Who Gets Red-Carded For Fighting Back
In American football, players who take down fans who invade the field during play are celebrated....
Everything's Bigger In Texas, Except When You Get Posterized By North Carolina's P.J. Hairston
Texas guard Julien Lewis is 6'3", and should probably know better than to try and stop North Carolina 6'6" freshman star P.J. Hairston. But he didn't, and it's to all of our benefit to be able to watch. [ESPN]...
The Atlanta Braves Wish You A Merry Christmas By Performing The Worst Rendition Of "Jingle Bells" Imaginable
Kris Medlen (the puffy-cheeked one with the bent brim) is the only one who gives it any effort, and he's followed by Chipper Jones's smug sunburnt visage. Ugh. Merry Christmas....