as Page 2153 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Last Night's Winner: Shopping Malls
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the megasize temple of commerce that assaulted me with annoying children, terrible seasonal music and then took all my money. You win again, Christmas....
Who Knew Greg Oden's Magical Exploding Kneecap Was Contagious?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
This Is Not How A Human Leg Is Supposed To Bend (Update)
Gruesome, gruesome injury for Texas A&M guard Derrick Roland tonight....
Free Skating At Fenway? It'll Cost You
Scalpers, by definition, resell tickets at multiples of face value. Boston scalpers, perhaps having failed math, have marked up ostensibly free tickets by some magic factor that turns zero dollars into: lots of money....
Yankees Hope To Revive Glory Days Of The First Half Of The 2004 ALCS
Javier Vazquez's last start for the New York Yankees left the franchise flying pretty darn high. Everything after that was a bit of a blur, but why not give it another whirl? Watch your hands, because this is a HOTFUCKINGSTOVE!...
Last Night's Winner: Tyreke Evans' Shorts
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Sacramento Kings, who showed up two-and-a-half quarters late (like the fans at a Miami Heat game) and still managed to pull out a win....
Let's All Question Myron Rolle's Priorities
The hardest part about writing a fawning profile of Myron Rolle might be getting over to Oxford to interview him. Today, though, The Wall Street Journal adds a wrinkle: Will Rolle's decision to postpone the NFL actually pay off financially?...
Jason Marquis Final Key To The Nationals 20-Year Rebuilding Plan
Those frisky Nats have bolstered their pitching staff by nabbing someone on their wish list and the Mets continue to be enamored with Japanese players. Jayson Stark sports a mighty chub for springtime so you know it's time for HOTFUCKINGSTOVE....
The Tackling Sled Of Death
Welcome to Asshole Coach Digest, where we regale you Deadspin folk with stories of the meanest, cruelest, most batshit insane coaches you ever had. Email me your asshole coach story here. Off we go....
Joe McKnight's Car Daddy Is Not Making A Lot Of Sense
The LA Times reported this weekend that USC back Joe McKnight has been spotted tooling around campus in a car that does not belong to him. It’s okay, though, because the real owner has a totally batshit explanation for that....
AP Anoints Fella Who Drives Fast And In Circles
Say hello to Jimmie Johnson, your AP Male Athlete of the Year. He's the first race-car driver to win the award. "I'm pretty sure that dude's Superman," Mark Martin said of Johnson. I'm pretty sure he's not. [AP]...
Let's All Thank God For Tommy Kelly's Jock Strap
And here's how we send you into this good night. Not just with a de-pantsed football player, but with a de-pantsed lineman. Click through only if you haven't eaten recently....
Lowell's Bum Thumb Gives Thumbs Down To Texas Deal
Eleven days later, the deal's off. The upside of re-signing him after the 2007 season: keeping a World Series winning team together. The downside: it's Mike Lowell, and he was all but guaranteed to be physically untradeable. [Boston Herald]...
This Athlete Is Gay; You Got A Problem With That?
Rugby legend Gareth Thomas comes out of the closet, and everyone takes it in stride. Really, America? We're not as progressive as the Welsh? [Daily Mail]...
The Game Ball Goes To The Timekeeper
The clock inexplicably stops to give the home team extra time on their last possession. The refs huddle up and decide to end the game before the visitors can have theirs. You're damn right there's going to be controversy....
No, Shaq Didn't
Like many of you, I went to elementary school, high school and college. I took such and such classes, earned such and such grades, and amassed such and such degrees....
Yes Virgins, Shaq Did Have Sexual Relations With Gilbert Arenas' "Baby Mamma." You Can Blame Feminism For That.
Last month, news reports began to surface that a centimillionaire professional athlete may have been unfaithful to his wife. Next someone's going to tell me Barney Frank is sodomist....
Redskins Owner Surprisingly Tone Deaf on Issue of Racial Sensitivity
White guy Dan Snyder fired white guy Vinny Cerrato and immediately replaced him with white guy Bruce Allen, so that he can bring in either white guy Mike Shanahan or THIS (white) GUY Jon Gruden. Isn't there some rule...?...
Bears Grounded in Chicago
The Chicago Bears are unable to make it to Baltimore, because of the massive terrible snowstorm that literally everyone in the mid-Atlantic area is being a tremendous baby about....