as Page 2188 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Hasheem Thabeet Has Checked Out
The junior center will give up his final year at UConn—as if this image didn't already scream, "Your amateur athletics bore me." [SI]...

Isiah Thomas Is Florida International's Problem Now
Florida International stinks at basketball, so I guess they figured—if we're going to stink we might as well leave a spectacular stench all over the basketball world. That's the only explanation for hiring Isiah Thomas....

Yep. That's Bruce Pearl Rapping With No Shirt On
The UT athletic department held their third annual VOLSCARS ceremony that I think is supposed to be a play on "Oscars" (as in Academy Awards) but it just reads as "Vol Scars," which is disgusting. Anyway, it's some sort of school-wide ESPY awards and this year's "entertainment" featured head basketb...

Tony Romo's Life Just Got Upskirt And Personal
Regardless of my Eagles fandom, Tony Romo seems like a well-mannered, well-adjusted human being who just happens to be quarterback for the second most despicable team in America. (NSFW)...

Tom Hicks Is Out Of Money
The Texas Rangers/Dallas Stars/Liverpool Kicking Guys owner has defaulted on about $500 million worth of loans and will probably have to sell his precious toys. But he was always so frugal and wise! [Dallas Observer]...

Condi Rice Says Fuzzy Zoeller Is One Of Her Favorite Golfers
She wrote an essay for the Daily Beast about following Tiger at the Masters (perks) and dropped the line about Fuzzy being one of her favorites. Also, Condi's favorite comedian? Michael Richards. [The Daily Beast]...

Brian Bosworth Is An American Hero
Cinematic legend Brian Bosworth is credited with (probably) saving the life of an unknown man when he hopped off his motorcycle to administer CPR—right after saving the lives of dozens of high school students....

Isiah Thomas Is Never Going Away
Rumor has it that Florida International wants to has hired organizational wunderkind Isiah Thomas to be their new head basketball coach. Unbelievable. I guess FIU doesn't have a history department. [ESPN]...

Just One More Out
One of the saddest stories I ever heard was when Harry Kalas was denied the chance to call the Phillies 1980 World Series live due to NBC's broadcast restrictions....

Mark Fidrych Found Dead On His Farm
What the hell is going on today? First Marilyn Chambers, then Harry Kalas, and now former Tiger Mark "The Bird" Fidrych have all passed in away in the span of about 24 hours....

The Phillies Dedicate The Pre-Game Smoke To Harry The K
At least, I hope that's the case. Phillies are playing Nationals right now with heavy hearts, wheezing lungs. [Player Hater's Ball]...

Easter In New Zealand Seems Festive
When there's a "Great Easter Bunny Hunt" in America it usually involves laughing children carrying wicker baskets filled with Cadbury eggs. But in New Zealand it involves 14,799 bloody bunny carcasses....

Sergio Garcia Says Golf Is Hard!
After finishing 75 and 74 on the weekend, Garcia complained that the course is "too tricky" and not "fair" and something about mudballs in the fairway. Garcia was complaining before he even got to Augusta, he complained during the tournament and now he's complaining after, even trashing the sacred l...

He's Gone
This is one of those days you just don't want to work anymore. [Philly.com]...

Usain Bolt Talks About Rollin' With His Homies
"In Jamaica, you learn as a child how to roll a joint. Everyone here has tried it. I did too — but I was real young then." [SI/AP]...

A Boob Grab Unlike Any Other
It's easy to get caught up in the emotion of Sunday at The Masters, but few fans have the determination to use that frenzy to their advantage and sneak in a boob grope at 15....

Masters Of Puppets I'm Pulling Your Strings
Barring a miraculous Tiger comeback or something extraordinary like Augusta being overtaken by Somali pirates, you can consider this the last post of the day on Easter Sunday. It's your Easter DUAN....

Tazed And Confused At Ted Ginn's Birthday Bash
"Buffalo Bills defensive back and former Ohio State star Donte Whitner was tasered and arrested early this morning following a birthday celebration at the House of Blues, police said." [Cleveland.com]...

Andy Roddick Will Marry Brooklyn Decker Next Weekend, Deucebag Says (Update)
Sometime Deadspin tennis correspondent Dylan Stableford reports that Andy Roddick and Brooklyn Decker will officially become a boring married couple in Austin, Tx. next weekend. His full emailed report appears once you click More....

Barry Zito Controls The Universe
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...