as Page 2232 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Thursday Night Preview: Virginia Tech at Miami
Virginia Tech at Miami (-4)-Tonight Virginia Tech and Miami continue the trail of tears-esque march towards crowning an ACC Champion. Miami has won 4 in a row (3 of them ACC games) and hasn't played since November 1 when they won an overtime game at Virginia. Since that time, as evidenced by the ab...

And Just When You Thought You've Seen Everything on Facebook....
This is Fox Sports/KC Star columnist Jason Whitlock's latest status update. Good God. Somebody send the man a laxative. Given all the problems Facebook has caused people in the last week, this one will hopefully not get anyone fired. Except, perhaps, Mr. Whitlock's proctologist. Odds on being de-fr...

Florida State Prepares For Boston College... By Thumping Some Black Frat Boys?
Details are still sketchy at this point, but apparently there was a little brouhaha on the campus of Florida State University yesterday and we don't want to alarm you ... but the football team may have been involved. Campus police say about ten individuals were involved (including at least two women...

Let Taxidermy Bring Out The Wildcat In You
Black Friday will be upon us soon and before you know it you will be huddled under blankets outside a Wal-Mart at four in the morning, begging the retailer to give you the honor being kicked in the head for a $10 DVD player. (Excuse me: "home entertainment system.") But why not avoid the muss and fu...

1. Get Hit In Groin With Baseball, 2. Scream In Agony, 3. Profit
We now know the going rate for volunteering to be hit in the nuts by a pitching machine baseball: 1 million bucks. Not that Lhyvann Felipe volunteered, exactly. The unfortunate fellow, who was nailed in a batting cage while picking up baseballs, was awarded $1.2 million last week by a Miami jury con...

So That's Why Everyone Hates Duke
Duke basketball is quite good, but not like Tiger Woods or Lance Armstrong good. They haven't won the ACC conference since 2006, they haven't been to the Final Four since 2004, and they haven't won the title since 2001. So it's not like there aren't other squads that are equally deserving targets of...

More Failed Shoplifting Tales From Not-So-Smart Athletes
A 20-year-old Binghamton University basketball player has been booted off the team after being charged with shoplifting from an incident on October 26. 20-year-old Malik Alvin was confronted by Wal-Mart security after he attempted to abscond with 36 condoms shoved down his pants. Alvin (Al-viiiin!) ...

Ashley Stewart Sues Larry Johnson, Poses In Wetlands Area
As if Larry Johnson didn't have enough problems — he's returning to active duty this Sunday for the tragic factory fire that is the Kansas City Chiefs — now he's being sued. Johnson allegedly spit on this woman, Ashley Stewart, during an altercation in a Kansas City nightclub last month, so she's ta...

College Basketball Returns—Now With Lower Field Goal Percentages!
Everyone's favorite team will open the college basketball season tonight, and by "tonight" I mean 4:00 p.m. this afternoon and by "favorite team" I mean "Georgia Southern," who will tip off against Houston in the first round of the Coaches vs. Cancer tournament that formally begins the NCAA year. To...

The Continuing Saga of One Online MMA Community and an Angry Martial Artist Pestering Rick Chandler
A little less than a month ago, you may remember the story about MMA fighter Lloyd Irvin and how he disarmed an intruder at his family's home using a fancy sambo technique. In the initial post that Rick wrote, he was skeptical about the report, which resulted in a few testy email exchanges with Mr. ...

College Football Roundup: The Hailey and Hanna Nutt Edition
In honor of BCS clarity arriving (thanks to Iowa we now know that the Big 12 will play the SEC for all the gold in Zimbabwe—that isn't already smuggled to Zurich), we bring you two striking young lasses who recently transferred from Arkansas to rejoin their daddy at Ole Miss. Meet Hailey and Hanna ...

Suddenly, Tyler Thigpen Is So Much More Than Just a Skeleton-Molesting Nobody
The Kansas City Chiefs are mired in a classic rebuilding season but the last three weeks the team has shown remarkable improvement on offense, most notably third-string quarterback Tyler Thigpen. The former Coastal Carolina quarterback has responded with some eye-opening output in his last three gam...

Caution: This Man Is Not 100 Percent Pure Beef
You may know Dave Wasser as the world's foremost collector of North American Soccer League game tapes (who doesn't?). But there is much, much more to the Austin, TX resident than that; he's a true Renaissance man. Just look at the photo above, and when your realize that he's not one of the chicks, i...

Diamondbacks Lay Off Dozens of Employees (Not Including Adam Dunn)
The purge of off-field employees has started in earnest this Credit Crunch offseason, with the Arizona Diamondbacks releasing 31 employees (around 10% of the entire front office), mostly from the broadcast side of the business as a result of selling all their games to Fox Sports Arizona. Yet again, ...

For Your Viewing Pleasure: Is This How You Kids Go Hawaiian?
• 12:00 — Biography: Donny and Marie Osmond [BIO] - "Well, you might like to hear some accordion; make that squeezebox swing." (This is our way to suggest that perhaps this is the day to clean out the eaves if you're not a fan of the football.) • 12:00 — Sport: Tennis - Sony Ericsson Championships, ...

Saturday Night Live Blog: #9 Oklahoma State at #2 Texas Tech
The Big XII has thirteen teams in the Top 10, and this is just another night in which two of them square off on a Saturday night. The undefeated Red Raiders get their second straight prime-time big game against the once-defeated Cowboys. Brent Musberger and Kirk Herbstreit brand cows with their init...

Install Texas Stadium End Zone in Your Back Yard (Cheerleaders Included)
In a blatant effort to rearm the Salvation Army in order to fight street to street in the urban centers and rural battlegrounds of America, Jerry Jones and a Coalition of the Willing to Appear Charitable in a Very Public Fashion have offered a unique combination of the gauche and the gaucho to the w...

Beckett, Lester Take Aim at Charity (and Pull Trigger)
Josh Beckett, putative Red Sox ace, believes the best charity comes at the end of a shotgun. Therefore, he has gathered all his rowdy friends (including fellow hurler Jon Lester-Who-Once-Had-Cancer, comedian Bill Engvall, and singer Troy Gentry) to his ranch this weekend, where they will hold the fi...

All-Purpose Pitching Machine Also Teaches Kids Not to Lie
We had this one really hard teacher in junior high. You know the type of teacher that thinks they're preparing you for the harsh realities of adulthood through tough love, including random screaming and no late papers and picking books about four grades higher than your class' skill set and wonderin...

No Word If Kutcher Is Asking Them For Painkillers
If you thought appearing in a bunch of shitty movies and banging some waif who was barely girl-next-door hot 20 years ago would impress a group of high school freshman football players, dude, you'd be, like, totally wrong and shit! There's a fun report out from Star regarding Ashton Kutcher's latest...