as Page 2244 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Suddenly, Tyler Thigpen Is So Much More Than Just a Skeleton-Molesting Nobody
The Kansas City Chiefs are mired in a classic rebuilding season but the last three weeks the team has shown remarkable improvement on offense, most notably third-string quarterback Tyler Thigpen. The former Coastal Carolina quarterback has responded with some eye-opening output in his last three gam...

Caution: This Man Is Not 100 Percent Pure Beef
You may know Dave Wasser as the world's foremost collector of North American Soccer League game tapes (who doesn't?). But there is much, much more to the Austin, TX resident than that; he's a true Renaissance man. Just look at the photo above, and when your realize that he's not one of the chicks, i...

Diamondbacks Lay Off Dozens of Employees (Not Including Adam Dunn)
The purge of off-field employees has started in earnest this Credit Crunch offseason, with the Arizona Diamondbacks releasing 31 employees (around 10% of the entire front office), mostly from the broadcast side of the business as a result of selling all their games to Fox Sports Arizona. Yet again, ...

For Your Viewing Pleasure: Is This How You Kids Go Hawaiian?
• 12:00 — Biography: Donny and Marie Osmond [BIO] - "Well, you might like to hear some accordion; make that squeezebox swing." (This is our way to suggest that perhaps this is the day to clean out the eaves if you're not a fan of the football.) • 12:00 — Sport: Tennis - Sony Ericsson Championships, ...

Saturday Night Live Blog: #9 Oklahoma State at #2 Texas Tech
The Big XII has thirteen teams in the Top 10, and this is just another night in which two of them square off on a Saturday night. The undefeated Red Raiders get their second straight prime-time big game against the once-defeated Cowboys. Brent Musberger and Kirk Herbstreit brand cows with their init...

Install Texas Stadium End Zone in Your Back Yard (Cheerleaders Included)
In a blatant effort to rearm the Salvation Army in order to fight street to street in the urban centers and rural battlegrounds of America, Jerry Jones and a Coalition of the Willing to Appear Charitable in a Very Public Fashion have offered a unique combination of the gauche and the gaucho to the w...

Beckett, Lester Take Aim at Charity (and Pull Trigger)
Josh Beckett, putative Red Sox ace, believes the best charity comes at the end of a shotgun. Therefore, he has gathered all his rowdy friends (including fellow hurler Jon Lester-Who-Once-Had-Cancer, comedian Bill Engvall, and singer Troy Gentry) to his ranch this weekend, where they will hold the fi...

All-Purpose Pitching Machine Also Teaches Kids Not to Lie
We had this one really hard teacher in junior high. You know the type of teacher that thinks they're preparing you for the harsh realities of adulthood through tough love, including random screaming and no late papers and picking books about four grades higher than your class' skill set and wonderin...

No Word If Kutcher Is Asking Them For Painkillers
If you thought appearing in a bunch of shitty movies and banging some waif who was barely girl-next-door hot 20 years ago would impress a group of high school freshman football players, dude, you'd be, like, totally wrong and shit! There's a fun report out from Star regarding Ashton Kutcher's latest...

For Your Viewing Pleasure: Kristi Yamaguchi Also Has Free Nights and Weekends
• 12:00 — Sport: College Football - Michigan at Minnesota [ESPN] and Ohio State at Northwestern [ESPN2] - Your Big Ten liver warmups. (Also, Baylor at Texas on FSN and Syracuse at Rutgers on ESPNU.) • 3:30 — Sport: College Football - Alabama at LSU [CBS], Stanford at Oregon [FSN], and Regional Potpo...

How Much Do LSU Fans Hate Nick Saban? The Coonass Bowl Is Upon Us
Wright Thompson of ESPN hung out with some LSU fans two weeks ago for the Georgia-LSU game. Not surprisingly LSU fans were focused less on Georgia and more on their hate for Nick Saban. The result is a rollicking story of what happens when you get dumped for a hated rival and then your former coach...

The Secret Connection Between Box Scores And Sex Work
Yes, I used to work at that dirty site where posts about handjobs and "back door girls" meant a slow news day, but I've also seen plenty of Carl Mondays try to make people feel bad about their special urges. So perhaps I have a different appreciation for what WGN morning sports anchor Pat Tomasulo i...

College Football Preview: John Parker Wilson's Cell Phone Belongs to the Cajuns
Alabama's John Parker Wilson is the latest SEC player attempting to overcome the LSU fans snagging his cell phone number and listing it everywhere on the internets. Confounding Cajuns. You'll recall that earlier this season Knowshon Moreno and A.J. Green were the victims. They joined Tim Tebow from...

When All Else Fails, Imply That They're Gay
The war of words between Joey Porter and, oh, everybody went from moderately amusing barbs to junior high homosexual jokes, which is typical in the hypersensitive, homophobic world of professional football players. When Porter questioned the NFL allowing Jaguars receiver Matt Jones to still play aft...

Lute Olson Soap Opera Gets A Little More Creepy
It's safe to say that the last couple years of Lute Olson's life have been difficult. Health problems and a nasty public divorce led him to miss most of last season on the bench at Arizona and walk out on his team just before this one began. But it seems that the split from his wife, Christine, is e...

It Ain't Easy Being Peezy...
Popcorn-muscled Dolphins linebacker Joey Porter picked a new target this week for his venomous trash-talk and this week's victim is Jacksonville Jaguars' receiver Matt Jones. You might remember when Jones was caught chopping a pile of cocaine in a pick-up truck in June, as did Peezy, who had this to...

Going For Gold At The Peasant Olympics
You didn't think that China spent $500 million of our hard-earned mortgage debt on the Bird's Nest just so some namby pamby athletes could run around inside it for two weeks and then let it sit empty, did you? There are plenty of other athletic contests that can be held there. Like the popular and e...

Stat Nerd Better At Predicting Elections Than Predicting The NL East
If you're a seamhead, you know Nate Silver as the Baseball Prospectus geek who has probably forgotten more about algorithms than you and I will ever know. He invented the PECOTA projection system, which predicted Tampa Bay's first 90-win season way back in February when the Devil Rays were still the...

Soccer Historian Keeps Long-Abandoned Hope Alive
Are you now or have you ever been affiliated with the North American Soccer League? If so, you can stop boring your friends with tales of late-'70s "cleat parties" and actually do something useful. Like contacting NASL superfan Dave Wasser, who is amassing the world's largest collection of game tape...

Your Halloween Costume Was Not This Good
I went to two pretty decent Halloween parties last weekend and saw a lot of clever costumes—Tony Stark with glowing chest plate, Anton Chigurh, Carmen Sandiego, Sewer Urchin, half the cast of "The Maltese Falcon," two Sarah Palins, 16 Jokers, and a dude in a Chinese gymnast leotard. But none—none—of...