as Page 2449 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night ...
What you missed while building a tiny Foreign Legion outpost in the kitty litter ... • NHL: March of the Penguins ... Malkin leads shootout win for Pittsburgh. • NBA: LeBron and his sprained big toe not enough to stop Wade, Heat • College basketball: Affalo! Bruins get revenge over Ducks....
Prepare Thyself For Dice K
Red Sox fans, take heart: You can now see Dice K himself, Daisuke Matsuzaka, pitching in a Red Sox uniform, kind of. In this ad for Asahi beer — we love that people can physically drink the beer in Japanese commercials — Dice K dons the duds and even throws a pitch, albeit with some less-than-convin...
He Was For DirectTV Before He Was ... Oh, You Know The Joke By Now
We had pretty much already given up hope on anyone noticing or caring that Major League Baseball was selling out its most die-hard fans for a quick buck. Just another of those times when we all get stepped on; as sports fans, we should probably be used to it by now....
New ABA Coach Has Cleanest Rain Gutters In His Neighborhood
We love the Dodge City Legends' motion offense; the one in which their center sets picks at the top of the key. Because it's important to keep the tallest player in the history of organized basketball as far away from the basket as you can at all times. You've probably heard of Sun Ming Ming, a nati...
Ah, To Be Able To Scream, Dance And Touch Athletes' Heads Again ...
This video, shot after Indiana's upset victory over Wisconsin last evening, is mostly grueling to watch, and definitely has that Blair Witch shaky-nausea feel to it. But, even though it is hated Indiana, we couldn't help but be charmed by the great college tradition of rushing the court after a big ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while bathing your dingo ... • College basketball: Indiana beats No. 2 Wisconsin, as a confused Kelvin Sampson chokes a chair and throws Neil Reid. • NBA: Hey look, Kobe's back! • NHL: Ice, ice baby ... Sundin's milestone goal is difference for Maple Leafs over Rangers....
What This Means For Us: The Chicago Bears
Way back in August, we asked various writers to preview their favorite NFL teams as the season approached. (We think the most famous was James Frey's "preview" of the Cleveland Browns.)...
Bonds Contract: Baseball's Version Of A Constitutional Crisis?
So someone took the time to actually read the contract that Barry Bonds signed with the Giants on Monday, and they made a startling discovery. According to the fine print, Bonds not only must play both ends of any doubleheaders, he must dress as Paula Abdul in the second game. Also, there's this:...
An Entirely Different Kind Of Monkey Suit
Sorry, ladies of Boston: Your hopes of bedding the youngest GM in baseball history, the man partly responsible for the Red Sox World Championship and one rockin' guitar hero are over. Red Sox GM Theo Epstein went out and got himself secretly married last month....
OJ Mayo Can Shove Refs With His Mind
We've been hearing all week about video of prep star O.J. Mayo's "incident," in which he supposedly knocked a referee over. Mayo claimed the ref was "vengeful" and that he pulled a soccer-type flop, for whatever reason....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while inventing bulletproof underpants ... • NBA: It's all about keeping the home fans happy. Mavericks win 14th straight at home, 122-102 over Sonics. • College basketball: New Mexico beats Wyoming as ... whoa! Fight! Fight! • NHL: Flames, Kings, burning, Conroy gets revenge on old ...
Forever Barry
He's 43, kind of a dick and subject to a variety of ailments, including, if you believe the horse steroids charges, laminitis. But nonetheless, Barry Bonds is officially back in the fold with the San Francisco Giants, ready to tackle Mt. Aaron once again. Whew. We were on pins and needles....
Albert Belle, Still Available
It's official, folks, if you can handle it: Sammy Sosa and the Texas Rangers have agreed on a deal. Sosa will receive $500,000 on a one-year contract and will be invited to make the team out of Spring Training. It's good to see that the new Rangers manager Ron Washington is attempting to be realisti...
He's Probably Been Waiting Outside The Studio For Weeks
We had a few people email us yesterday, mostly saying a variation on the following: "So I'm home with the flu, and it's possible that I'm just hallucinating, but I think I just saw A.J. Pierzynski as a bouncer on the 'Jerry Springer Show.' Can that be possible?"...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while constructing your oats-and-alfalfa wreath for Barbaro ... • NBA: Another buzzer-beater, as Nets beat Jazz. Exciting, ain't it? • College basketball: Pitt stops Villanova behind ... hey wait. Pitt has 20 wins already? Holy crap. • NHL: Canadiens beat Senators 3-1. Check their pa...
NBA Roundup: Raising Arizona
Notes from Sunday's games in the National Baskteball Association ......
About Last Night ...
What you missed while readjusting ... • College basketball: Iona gets a scare before finally losing as usual, preserving perfect record. • NBA: Steve Nash will not let you jinx this streak, dammit! • NHL: Not tonight, I have a Hasek ... Red Wings top Avalanche 3-1. • College basketball: Cardinal Rul...
Broken Glass! WooHoo!
Continuing with the theme of "Dunk Attempts Gone Awry," I'm happy to bring you this three-man high school effort....
In Hindsight, a Lay Up Might Have Been A Better Idea
Kansas forward Julian Wright has it all. The quick hands and anticipation on defense, the speed to get a breakaway dunk, and then, unfortunately, the spontaneous onset of quadriplegia during said dunk attempt....
College Hoops Compendium: I Hate It When UNC Is This Good
• (4) North Carolina 92, Arizona 64. Lute Olson vows to burn the game tape of this one, and if that's all he burns, it's an accomplishment, because no one would blame him if he engulfed himself in flames right about now. Arizona had lost three of their last four, but still had this date to look at ....