as Page 883 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fight At Indians’ Stadium Goes South, Just Like Their Season
When Sun Tzu wrote Art of War around 500 B.C., there’s no way he could have possibly imagined his philosophies getting used in the context of a fight amongst baseball fans in Cleveland, but that’s exactly what appears to have happened on Saturday night. In the ninth chapter, so to speak, Tzu writes ...
Iowa State Found The Assiest Way To Lose El Assico
Iowa and Iowa State met last night and participated in the annual tradition of putting on the most consistently terrible rivalry game in college football. Last night’s edition of the clash truly lived up to its El Assico nickname, in no small part because of how Iowa State managed to finally lose it...
Mississippi State's Garrett Shrader Evolves Into Human Helicopter, Fails To Convert First Down
There aren’t a lot of options in most playbooks for a fourth-and-16 situation, but that didn’t get Mississippi State out of that exact scenario late in the fourth quarter against Kansas State on Saturday. After quarterback Garrett Shrader snapped the ball, and all of his receivers went running down ...
Reports: The Justice Department Is Investigating Sex Abuse In The Olympic Movement
The Wall Street Journal reported today that the U.S. Department of Justice has launched criminal investigations into sexual abuse across multiple U.S. Olympic organizations as well as “potential financial and business misconduct throughout the U.S. Olympic system.” Other news outlets later reported ...
Shaun Livingston Outlasted Everything
Given everything we know and can reasonably surmise about where the organization was and the people in charge of it, it seems safe to say that the Los Angeles Clippers didn’t have anything specific in mind when they drafted Shaun Livingston out of an Illinois high school with the fourth pick of the ...
SB Nation Deletes Racist Article Full Of Jokes About Domestic Violence
One unfortunate side effect of having thousands of lowly paid people running a network of hundreds of team sites that drive traffic for a billion-dollar company, is that there’s not a whole lot of time for proper editorial vetting. This problem has manifested itself at SB Nation on numerous occasion...
Ronald Acuña's 40/40 Season Now Feels Inevitable
With his 39th home run and 35th and 36th stolen bases on Thursday night against the Phillies, Ronald Acuña put a historic bow on his season by becoming the youngest player to accomplish a 35-35 season in baseball history. While Acuña bashing dingers and swiping bases has come to feel routine this ye...
Luc Longley Mad That Spain Keeps Getting "Kissed On The Dick By The Basketball Gods"
Australia just lost a tough game to Spain in the semifinals of the FIBA World Cup. The Boomers led most of the way, but lost their lead at the end of regulation, thanks in part to a few dodgy calls that went against them. They eventually lost in double-overtime, 95-88....
Interminable Mike Pereira Rules Monologue Interrupted Several Times By Ghastly Football
The NFL’s got to clean this crap up. The Thursday night game between the Panthers and Buccaneers was already a hellish, dismal slog, featuring punchless, amateurish offense run by a pair of deeply disinterested quarterbacks. Then the fourth quarter rolled around, and what might’ve otherwise been at ...
Washington's Running Back Conflict Resolves Itself In Characteristically Grim, Destructive Fashion
Washington running back Derrius Guice missed his entire rookie season after suffering a knee injury during his first career preseason game. This year, Guice injured his other knee in his first career regular season game, and is expected to miss only half the year. If he keeps this pattern up, the th...
Report: Spencer Dinwiddie Gives Me A Migraine With Complex-Sounding Contract Conversion Plans
Spencer Dinwiddie, a cool basketball man, is planning to sell bonds secured by his contract with the Brooklyn Nets in order to raise up-front investment capital, or anyway that is how I have chosen to make sense of this gobbledygook-ass report from Shams Charania of The Athletic....
Someone Wanted A Johnny Manziel Jersey Bad Enough To Steal One From A Museum
The Texas A&M campus police asked for help Thursday afternoon identifying a “person of interest” in the theft of the uniform of NFL bust and CFL flameout Johnny Manziel, last seen having a cup of coffee with the now defunct Alliance of American Football. The uniform was reportedly stolen from A&M’s ...
Should A Home Run Automatically End An Inning?
I will not keep you waiting for an answer on this one. No, absolutely not and under no circumstances would it be a good idea for a homer to automatically end an inning in a big league baseball game. It seems important not to equivocate on this question. And yet this Funbag question, from a listener ...
Big Boban Engulfs Donovan Mitchell On Jump Ball
Team USA lost to Serbia, 94-89, in a consolation round matchup at the FIBA World Cup today, ensuring their worst-ever finish at any international tournament. The underperformance of an talent-depleted national team is less interesting to me than the physical prowess of one of basketball’s very large...
Team USA Embarrasses Itself At FIBA World Cup, Jerry Colangelo Follows Suit
Team USA lost its second straight FIBA World Cup game this morning in China, falling 94-89 to Serbia in a fifth-place consolation game, after yesterday’s embarrassing loss to France eliminated the American team from championship contention. Now the team cannot finish higher than seventh place in the...
The Story Behind The Biggest Brawl In WNBA History
Last month, Brittney Griner of the Phoenix Mercury and Kristine Anigwe of the Dallas Wings got into a fight, which resulted in six ejections and five suspensions. It was the largest WNBA fight since 2008, when the Detroit Shock (now the Dallas Wings) and the Los Angeles Sparks were part of brawl tha...
Jordin Canada Might Just Be The Heir To Sue Bird's Throne
The defending champion Seattle Storm took the expected fall that came with a pair of devastating preseason injuries, going a mere 18-16 in 2019 after dominating the league with a 26-8 record last year. But even without reigning MVP Breanna Stewart or living legend Sue Bird, the Storm managed to snea...
We Are Drowning In Dingers
The home run that made baseball history was pretty workaday, as they go. Sure, it was a big moment in the game, breaking a seventh-inning tie to give the Orioles a 5-2 lead over the Dodgers. But this game didn’t really matter to either team, and Jonathan Villar’s homer—the 6,106th homer hit in MLB t...
Dwight Howard Has A Purple Car For The Most Dwight Howard Of Reasons
There are plenty of perfectly good reasons to enjoy the color purple. Among them, I look quite fetching in purple shirts, which is no small matter. It’s a lovely color. If I tell you that Dwight Howard enjoys the color purple, right away you are going to assume that it’s for a dumb and bad reason. W...
Dipshit NFL Reporter Exposes His Entire Ass With Blockheaded Tweets About Antonio Brown's Rape Case
Oftentimes, the worst examples of society’s despicable penchant for immediately blaming and/or discrediting women who report being victims of sexual assault are relegated to anonymous, obscure social media posters and website commenters. Other times, the dumbfucks embodying the trend are people with...