as Page 983 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Vladimir Guerrero Jr. Taking BP Is 35 Seconds Of ASMR Bliss
There are no inconsequential games left in this rapidly narrowing baseball season, and very few moments that won’t be suffused with at least some degree of tension. This is what makes October baseball cool, but also it’s not really a reflection of what baseball is actually like. What fills out the r...
![Cristiano Ronaldo's Lawyer Claims Documents Related To Rape Allegation Were Doctored [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/hnqgimxwgoup60xgxcts.jpg)
Cristiano Ronaldo's Lawyer Claims Documents Related To Rape Allegation Were Doctored [Update]
In light of the new lawsuit against Cristiano Ronaldo pertaining to an incident in 2009 in which Kathryn Mayorga says Ronaldo raped her, the Portuguese forward’s lawyer has released a statement contesting the accuracy of the documents produced in the Der Spiegel report that broke the story....

Roger Federer Literally Couldn't Hit This Ball
Today at the Shanghai Masters, Roger Federer played his first match since he left the U.S. Open looking like he’d fallen in the pool. Federer barely survived a sharp Daniil Medvedev to win 6-4, 4-6, 6-4, but the Russian, who ripped through seven wins last week to qualify and win Tokyo, made the shot...

This Predators Banner Is So Embarrassing
Tuesday was the home opener for the Predators, and they celebrated their 2017–18 season, as they had every reason to; they were good as hell last year, despite falling in the second round to the also-good-as-hell Jets. So they raised some banners. Two of them, perfectly fine banners. One of them, no...

Game 4 Winning Pitcher: "I Thought Ángel Hernández Called A Good Game." Game 4 Losing Pitcher: "He's Absolutely Terrible."
CC Sabathia got touched up for five hits, two walks, and three runs over three lousy innings Tuesday night, and took the loss in Boston’s series-clinching win over the Yankees. Afterward, he lit up umpire Ángel Hernández, who was behind the plate in Game 4:...

Red Sox Survive Near Ass-Shitting, Eliminate Yankees
The Red Sox went for the kill Tuesday night. Ahead 4–1 headed to the bottom of the eighth inning, Alex Cora sent ace Chris Sale to the mound in relief. This should of course not screw with Sale’s availability in the ALCS, but it is for sure not a decision that was taken lightly. ...

Good Dog Throws A Mean Alley-Oop
Max Pearce is an extremely good dunker. He participated in the 2018 College Dunk Contest, where he threw down a memorable and pleasingly violent one-handed self-alley-oop while filming himself with a cell phone in his off hand. The website of Purchase College says Pearce has signed with the Harlem G...

Mike Clevinger Is Just Ridiculously Angry At Robert Flores For Sharing A Silly Video
Cleveland starter Mike Clevinger pitched adequately in his team’s final game of the postseason on Monday, though the relievers after him completely self-destructed in the 11-3 loss to the Astros. It seems like that’s still a sore spot for Clevinger....

Belfast Giants Hockey Player Denied Ass-tonishing Goal By Boring Refs
Hockey moves blindingly fast. At its highest levels, it becomes a breakneck ballet, demanding split-second decision-making, nimble movement, and constant improvisation from its practitioners. In a recent game in the UK’s Elite Ice Hockey League, Belfast Giants forward Patrick Dwyer (formerly of the ...

Italy Set To Unleash Lasagna Upon Poland
Italy’s pantry of attacking players has long been worryingly bare, and with the recent injury to striker Simone Zaza, national team manager Roberto Mancini was practically starved for a new flavor to add to the mix. Today Mancini announced that he has at last found the missing ingredient: Lasagna....

Detroit Arena To Replace Conspicuously Empty Red Seats With Less Conspicuously<em></em> Empty Black Seats
Ever since the new, taxpayer-funded home of the Pistons and Red Wings opened in Detroit, people have taken note of the often empty seats surrounding the action. This was especially true during Pistons games last season, when the team consistently found itself playing in front of a sea of vacant red ...

Michael Thomas Stayed Up Late To Needle "Goof Ball Con Artist" Josh Norman On Twitter
Saints wide receiver Michael Thomas and Skins cornerback Josh Norman spent much of last night feuding on Twitter after New Orleans drubbed Washington 43-19 on Monday night. It started with three different Skins defensive backs calling out Thomas in their post-match pressers for being a twerp....

Nick Kyrgios Is Just Another Grump Railing At The Umpire Now
Nick Kyrgios is no longer playing well or amusingly enough to justify the usual apologist disclaimer, so let’s just get to the point. On Monday at the Shanghai Masters, where he has tanked for two years running, he once again flirted with nihilism as he lost to world No. 104 Bradley Klahn, 4-6, 6-4,...

Angel Hernandez Is Just Guessing Over There
If you watched until the end of Boston’s 16-1 win over the Yankees in Game 3, you are either a masochist or a Red Sox fan. But the game was at least a few minutes longer than it needed to be, thanks to umpire Angel Hernandez flipping a coin to decide bang-bang plays at first....

It Is Hazardous To Look Directly At Alex Smith's Lowlight Reel
It was not quantifiably the worst passing performance of the season or even the week. But Alex Smith’s Monday night stinkbomb, especially contrasted with a superlative (and record-breaking) game from Drew Brees, was for my money the ugliest QB performance of the season....

Steve Kerr Says "I Don't Want To Be Here," Gets Ejected, Waves Goodbye
The Warriors left Klay Thompson and Draymond Green out of Monday’s preseason game against the Suns. Who cares! No team maybe ever has had any less use for the preseason than the 2018-2019 Golden State Warriors. Steve Kerr knows this. Watch him thank the referees for hitting him with technical fouls ...

Red Sox Make History With Savage Game 3 Beatdown Of Yankees
The fourth inning was pure hell for the Yankees Monday night, and euphoric for Red Sox fans. Luis Severino, who was so strong in the AL Wild Card game, put three men on to open the inning. Lance Lynn came on in relief and immediately walked in a run, then gave up a two-run double. He was yanked havi...
![Refs Flag Excessive Celebration After Drew Brees Breaks All-Time Passing Yardage Mark [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/yizri5bpsorpbvjzxwqt.gif)
Refs Flag Excessive Celebration After Drew Brees Breaks All-Time Passing Yardage Mark [UPDATE]
Drew Brees came into Monday night’s home game against Washington needing 201 yards to break Peyton Manning’s career passing yardage record of 71,940* yards. He could’ve dinked and dunked his way to the record, but fuck that—in the second quarter, with his team already up 20–6, Brees unloaded a long ...

Chris Bosh's Teeny Son Has Yet To Learn The Way Of The Baller
Chris Bosh introduced his adorable children to MSG Network’s Rebecca Haarlow during Monday night’s Wizards-Knicks preseason game. These are some seriously cute children. Haarlow, thinking fast, asked Bosh’s teeny son Jackson whether he will grow up to be a baller. It turns out innocent young Jackson...

Fire The Suns Into The Sun
The Suns fired GM Ryan McDonough on Monday. Firing McDonough makes sense, as he has proven himself to be very bad at building a coherent NBA roster, let alone one capable of winning more games than it loses. Firing him nine days before the start of the regular season is just more flailing absurdity ...