at Page 2255 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Night's Winner: Scott Hamilton's Tear Ducts
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Hamilton and everyone else who had themselves another happy cry last night over Joannie Rochette, winner of a bronze medal that looks golden from here....

Eric Hinske Some Kind Of Circus Freakshow Now
Two years of work and $5000 later, the well-traveled utilityman finally completed...something. "[He] said there is no special significance to the design," but I'm pretty sure he's now officially Yakuza. [AJC]...

Great Moments In Public Urination Journalism
Villanova's junior guard Corey Stokes got busted for peeing in public, occasioning this line: "Stokes was urinating between two parked cars at about 3 a.m. while surrounded by several teammates." Jay Wright should be proud. That's real teamwork. [ZagsBlog]...

You're With Me, Meme
Flip to page 195 of this month's GQ. You'll find a spread in which everyone's favorite Bermanism appears atop Topher Grace's crotch. And thus "You're With Me, Leather" becomes one of many viral sensations to spread to smarmy Hollywood wang....

Russian Bobsledder A Little Too Pleased By Canadian Wipeout
The dirty unspoken secret of the Olympics is that for every frightening, bone-rattling, face-scraping wipeout, there's a thrilled athlete whose road to glory just got a little bit smoother. The trick is to not seem too thrilled about it....

Oakland Athletics: Meet Your Montreal Expos
Will Leitch will be previewing/musing on every baseball team each weekday until the start of the season. You can pre-order his book and follow him on Twitter. Today: The Oakland Athletics....

This Would Never Have Happened If We Still Had Beepers
Patrick Beckert was an alternate for the 1000m, so when one skater went down injured, it might as well have been glory calling. But he didn't answer, because his cell phone was turned off. [Bild]...

Vonn Crashes (Again) And Other Things You Already Know, But NBC Will Pretend You Didn't: Open Thread
So that happened, but it's being shown again tonight on NBC, so feign appropriate levels of disappointment to give support to NBC's advertising sponsors. It's the least you can do....

Everyone Will See Live Hockey On Friday, NBC Says
From a memo just sent to NBC Uni staff: "The USA semifinal men's hockey game against the winner of the Czech Republic vs. Finland will be broadcast live in all time zones on NBC this Friday at 3 p.m. ET."...

Why Won't NBC Follow Its Own Advice On Live Broadcasts?
Don't read this post if you plan to watch the USA-Switzerland game at a time that is not when it's happening, which is now. Unless you want to stand around the Big Internet Twitter Cooler that all the kids love....

Real, Live Brian Westbrook Says He Has No Plans To Retire
From 97.5TheFanatic:"My plan is to continue to play, I'm gonna put all my effort into doing that and I will make a return to the NFL. " He made no mention of Howard Stern's prostate. [SRI]...

NBC's Olympic Coverage Gives Word To Your Mother
Joannie Rochette's teary-eyed ice skating routine almost short-circuited this morning's Sap-o-meter. Seven mentions of "mom" in one night ties a record for this year's Winter Games. 10 mentions of "mother" shatters the previous mark. [Slate]...

I Do Not Believe Hillary Duff Is Actually Giving Mike Comrie A Blowjob In This Photo
But it looks like she is. Comrie reportedly spent $1 million on Duff's ring. He did not go to Jared. [BarstoolSports, Jr. and Bauer Griffin]...

Randy Hustle, Giving It His All
Randy Moss, already vaguely unhappy in New England, took part in an NFL charity softball game. He hit what looked like an easy infield fly...want to guess whether he ran it out or not?...

With One Raised Digit, Tom Brokaw Inadvertently Expresses NBC's Contempt For You: Open Thread
Here's Brokaw — NBC mascot, author of The Bestest Generation Ever, bewildered old man who occasionally wanders onto the Olympics set — gesturing during a fireside après-ski. Perfect. The network is basically an old guy giving you the finger, anyway....

NBC To West Coast Hockey Fans: "Kiss Our Moose!"
Ready for some fresh NBC outrage? Just wait until tomorrow, when Oregon discovers that the broadcast for USA Hockey's quarterfinal doesn't start until three hours after the actual game does. I understand hockey really comes to life on the radio....

Basketball Players Should Touch Each Other More Often, Science Urges
Scientists, those smart people who split the atom and cured polio, have charted hugs and high fives for every NBA team and concluded that, as The New York Times puts it, "good teams tended to be touchier than bad ones."...

Dilemma: Why Can't Ski Jumping Be More Dangerous?
In the era of murderous luge runs and five-story mogul jumps, putting waxed floorboards on your feet and throwing yourself off a mountain just isn't what it used to be. Where have you gone, Vinko Bogataj? [NY Times/Pat's Papers]...

The Olympics Have Daddy Issues
Slate's Sap-o-Meter reports: "Cumulatively, the words father, dad, and son were uttered a staggering 47 times between Friday and Sunday," largely on the strength of an Apolo Ohno feature. The Winter Olympics are the new baseball. [Slate]...

She Also Doesn't Finish On Top, Nudge Nudge, Wink Wink, Say No More
Odd headline from the front page of the Orlando Sentinel sports section: "Danica Patrick won't toot your flute or mess up her lipstick." Very 1950s, in both sexism and euphemism. [Orlando Sentinel]...