at Page 2457 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phillies Just Sank Mets' Jengajam
As most of you have already seen, Tom Glavine's outing today didn't last too long — maybe he was double parked? — as the Florida Marlins lit up Mr. 300 with seven runs in the first inning en-route to an 8-1 win. With that, they needed Philadelphia to lose and force a tie. They've been counting on Ph...


But Trent Edwards Holds No Touchdown Records
Bills 17, Jets 14 — The J.P. Losman era in Buffalo might go the way of William Henry Harrison after Trent Edwards' surprising 22-for-28, 234-yard performance. Jets fans are dismayed that their team lost, but encouraged that it was Chad Pennington's fault, since his last-ditch effort at the end the g...

Hoo Boy, Those Ravens Are Not Skilled At Football
Son of a Travis Henry, these Week 4 games are starting off boring. Let's check how each game stood at halftime, because that's how the other weekend guys were doing it, I think:...


You'd Think LeBron Would Be Accustomed To Being Surrounded By Nobodies
Like many of you since 1996, I missed Saturday Night Live last night, hosted by LeBron James, and have only the YouTubery offered up by NBC to go on. In this case, the monologue ("LeBronologue!" Oh, what whimsy!) was my favorite. There was also a High School Musical skit that had so much potential, ...

Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Oklahoma
ESPN enjoys to alliterate Saturdays with "S" words — which are words that begin with the letter "S" — to glorify the weekend's slate of intense games. Separation Saturday comes foremost to mind. But with all the upsets that occurred in the Top 25, perhaps yesterday should be known as "Suck It" Satur...

Non-Football Sports On TV (And NFL Coverage Maps)
• 12 noon — Golf: Presidents Cup, Final Round [NBC] • 1:00 p.m. — Bowling: Women's U.S. Open [ESPN] • 1:00 p.m. — Movie: Top Gun [Spike] • 2:00 p.m. — NASCAR: LifeLock 400, at Kansas Speedway [ABC] • 2:00 p.m. — MLB: Braves at Astros [TBS] • 2:00 p.m. — MLB: Tigers at White Sox [WGN]...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while sitting on your Concorde jet toilet seat... • 8 p.m. — NCAA Football: Auburn at Florida [ESPN], Ohio State at Minnesota [ESPN2]. It's not October yet, and OSU is already playing it's second road game. Man, what a schedule. • 8 p.m. — Movie: The Office. I'm trying to think of a qu...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while scrolling up classic cinemas... • NCAA Football: South Wang upsets West Middlefinger 21-13. • Preseason NHL: Canucks edge Flames 3-2, powered by Curtis Sanford's 40 saves, ya big dummy. • Women's Olympic Basketball: US 85, Canada 37. But in metric points, Canada only lost by si...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as police try to unravel the baffling case of The Unknown Streaker ... • MLB: San Diego at Milwaukee. This one can pretty much decide two races, right? [ESPN] • College football: West Virginia at South Florida. Go, WFV! [ESPN2] • Golf: PGA Tour, Viking Classic, second round, Madison, M...

Your National League Clusterphooey
All due respect to the playoffs next week, but we can't fathom a much more exciting turkeyshoot than the National League this weekend. We're three days away from the end of the season, and not a single team has clinched, with seven still in the chase. It's insane....

It's An Exciting Time In The World Of Sports-Themed Beverages
As detailed yesterday, carbonated beverage lovers were overjoyed to see Jones Soda roll out five new exciting flavors based on the Seattle Seahawks, all based on things found in Holmgren's mustache. The flavors: Natural Field Turf Soda (featuring Josh Brown), Sports Cream Soda (featuring Matt Hassel...

Penn State Will Sue Your Elementary School Back To The Stone Age
Hold on there, Conway Elementary School seventh-grade flag football team. Not another step. Your logo is infringing on the intellectual property rights of Penn State University, and must be removed from all t-shirts, school binders and backpacks. Here are a team of copyright lawyers to make sure you...

We Have To Ask
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Fantasy NFL with Scott Engel: Your advice to choose the Bengals defense has proven unwise. Prepare for merciless retribution. • 3 p.m. Injury report with Stephania Bell: By ignoring my letters, you have broken my heart. Won't y...

Bring Your Umbrellas To Paul Brown Stadium On Monday
There might be no better metaphor for the beginning of the Cincinnati Bengals' season than the fact that fans have been noticing bird poop in their beers....

Two NL East Ballparks, Exactly Opposite
We were at Shea Stadium last night, wearing our Rick Ankiel jersey, of course, and we noted that we were 100 percent unmolested. We chalk this up partly to the fact that Mets fans are about 60 times nicer to visiting fans than Yankees fans, but mostly, Shea Stadium was a morgue last night. The Cardi...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after reading too much Poe ... • College football: Southern Mississippi at Boise State. Blue rug burns for everyone! [ESPN] • MLB: Chicago Cubs at Florida. Cubs wil not choke, Cubswillnotchoke ...[WGN] • Soccer: MLS, Los Angeles at Kansas City. A real ratings grabber, if only it were t...

Drink Up, Sports Fans
In the tradition of Michael Jordan (or Derek Jeter) cologne comes a flavor of Jones Soda that's designed to make your mouth a-water: It's perspiration soda....

Of Course; Electric Skates! We'd Be Idiots Not To Try Them!
Introducing, the Therma Blade! Battery-warmed skates that melt the ice to provide more speed. Wayne Gretzky endorses them, so that's something, right? However the first thing that caught my eye about this item — and it may be a telling metaphor — is that the bottom half of the above photo distinctly...