at Page 2482 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"Hey, Guys! It's Oliver!"
Maybe we just couldn't muster up the incredible enthusiasm of these "baseball" "players."...
Chip And Dale Don't Like Your Looks And Would Prefer That You Leave
Once the vibrant and thriving center of the city, Downtown Disney has fallen on hard times. Crime is rampant, property values have plummeted and the area is ripe with decay. Witness Minnie Mouse, turning tricks at the seedy Disney Inn. Goofy has been arrested 17 times for aggressive panhandling. And...
Floyd Mayweather, A Heavy Spawner
Since he beat Oscar de la Hoya in the First Fight To End All Fights That Involved, In Fact, No Fighting, Floyd Mayweather has been making sure to enjoy himself. But it's all fun and games until you're served with a child-support suit at the BET Awards....
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. NBA with Chad Ford: Hey Greg Oden, Robert Parish called, and he wants his face back. • 3 p.m. Miami Heat G Dwyane Wade: Have you seen Geiger's house? Damn. • 4 p.m. Football scientist KC Joyner: With these delicate new instrument...
How The "Mighty" Have Fallen
You might remember, almost three years ago, when the Arizona Diamondbacks hired former Met Wally Backman to be their manager before firing him when they discovered an old DUI arrest and his impending bankruptcy. It was a tough break, particularly when he had to take a job managing the South Georgia ...
Water Covers 70 Percent Of The Earth's Surface; Manny Covers The Rest
Using his uncanny speed and catlike reflexes, Manny Ramirez could probably patrol the entire outfield by himself if he wanted to. But that would probably just dishearten the other two guys and cause team dissension, so he restricts himself to left. In fact, like Clark Kent, Manny has to tone it down...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you brush your woolly mammoth ... • Boxing: Super middleweights, Yusef (Easy) Mack vs. Jose Juan (Gone) Vasquez, at New York. [ESPN2] • MLB: St. Louis at New York Mets. This time, it's personal (not really). [ESPN] • MLB: Nationals at Braves. Bring me the head of Screech the Eagle. ...
East Side Little League Will Cap Your Ass
First of all, this is not a hockey post. This Wade Campbell is a Little League dad, who, concerned that his son wasn't getting enough playing time, had a cheerful discussion with his coach. Yes, the term "shot down like a dog" was used, but only in the most constructive of ways....
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1:15 p.m. My Wish With Jennifer Walters. So, now that you've met Jimmie Johnson, everything in your life is great, right? Sweet. • 3 p.m. Fantasy baseball with Ron Shandler. You know, your disapproving, condescending nods ... we can se...
Matt Geiger Lives Like A Freaking King
If you ever needed a reminder how the life of a professional athlete is infinitely better than yours is, we re-introduce you to Matt Geiger. The journeyman center bounced around the NBA for 10 years, fouling Shaq a lot, mostly just being bald. And how was rewarded for his tenure? Rather handsomely. ...
Yes, EIU Wrestlers, We Understand Your Point
Last month, the Eastern Illinois University wrestling program was discontinued by the school, which cited low academic marks from the team. The grapplers immediately protested in the only way they know how....
It's Becoming More Fun To Talk About The NBA Than To Watch It
So, to make this clear, in the last week or so, Kevin Garnett has alternately been going to the Bulls (definitely!), the Lakers (without question!) and now the Suns (put it in the books!). ESPN has all the different scenarios, which include the Suns giving up Shawn Marion or Amare Stoudemire, the Ce...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you await Young Frankenstein, the musical ... • MLB: Colorado at Chicago Cubs. The barefoot guy tried to take the field, security refused to yield, do you recall what was revealed the day, the Rockies died. [WGN] • WNBA: New York at Sacramento. Liberty. Monarchs. We're getting the h...
The Exact Human Opposite Of Jim Nantz
Ron Jaworski? Please. This is your new MNF foil for Kornheiser....
Grow, Controversy, Grow!
Our favorite headline of the month so far comes from Philadelphia, where jockey Victor Molina has been charged with domestic abuse. The victim? His racehorse, whom he kicked in the stomach following a race at Philadelphia Park. The headline? Jockey Short With Horse, naturally....
The Gyroball Rock
A little late on this, but if you were wondering whether Daisuke Matsuzaka was blessed with musical talent, rest assured, folks, the guy has mad vocal skillz. And by "mad vocal skills," we mean, he warbles songs to warm your heart and soul. He's like the Japanese Oprah....
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Fantasy baseball with Nate Ravitz: We don't want to hear about your fantasy baseball team! • 1 p.m. College basketball recruiting: Well, it was nice for that coach on the front porch to bring in the newspap ... hey! Where's the...