aw Page 455 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Serena Williams Bounced From French Open
A three-set loss to Svetlana Kuznetsova. So both Williams sisters, Maria Sharapova, the chick with the giant rack, and the shrieking girl are out of the French Open. It's almost like they're daring you to pay attention. [Roland Garros]...

Female Tennis Star With Prodigious Backside Accuses Opponent Of Cheating
"Drama" was the word Serena Williams used after her French Open match against Maria Jose Martina Sanchez. Williams claims Sanchez used her arm instead of a racket to return a ball over the net, prompting a finger-pointing outburst and introspection....

Yes, That Is A Horse In Vogue
Why should Rachel Alexandra race the boys when she can fulfill a filly's fantasy and appear in Vogue, at the behest of Anna Wintour? "She was there at the Preakness and was inspired, like so many other women were," a spokeswoman said. [The Rail]...

Why Your Stadium Sucks: AT&T Park
This is a new weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The San Francisco Giants' AT&T Park....

Jets Sued For Manipulating Ticket Prices By Men Who Wanted Jets Tickets, For Some Reason
Three men are suing the Jets for manipulating seat-license prices in an auction. The plaintiffs would have an excellent case, I think, if their judgment and credibility weren't immediately called into question by the fact that they were trying to buy Jets seat licenses. In an auction....

This Is Why Football Does Not Have Innings
A ridiculous experiment in "inning-based" football degenerated into a bench-clearing, crowd-rioting brawl, all because former Michigan quarterback Todd Collins does not understand the basic principles of clock management....

Anquan Boldin To Drew Rosenhaus: You Have Failed Me, Now Go
Boldin fires Rosenhaus; Rosenhaus makes lemonade: "I'm hopeful we can work this out and he can return to the Rosenhaus Sports family in the near future. We are proud to continue to represent his brother, D.J. Boldin."[ESPN]...

Michael Jordan Loves Chicago Almost As Much As He Loves Nike
An animatronic Jordan doll donned a Blackhawks jersey at the United Center this weekend, to show his support for the "hometown" boys—but not before he had team officials sew a red patch over the Reebok logo. Nothing to see here, Mr. Knight! [Puck Daddy]...

Patriots Team Up With State Lotto; NFL Conveniently Forgets That It Pretends To Hate Gambling
Remember the NFL's feigned outrage over sports gambling in Delaware? All that sanctimonious stuff about tarnishing the game's image and leading children to degenerate lives of laying the points with the Pats on the road? Well, apparently none of that applies to state-run lotteries....

Royals Fans Turn Children's Playground Into Thunderdome
Two couples started an all-out brawl at a Kansas City Royals game on Sunday after a woman walked in front another woman as she was taking a picture, a breech of etiquette that clearly deserves a head stomping. If a few kids got hurt along the way, that's just business....

Shocker: Larry King's Horsey Tale Is Full Of Holes
Yesterday, excerpting from his memoirs, Larry King spun a sweet little tale of hitting it big at the racetrack, thanks to a plucky horse named Lady Forli. Are you sitting down? It's all a lie!...

Which NBA Wife Packs Her Husband's Condoms When He Goes On Road Trips?
A non-sequitur of a post on bizarro world sports site MomLogic appears to be an anonymous confession from a "realistic" sports widow who knows what side her road beef is buttered on....

Midwesterners Sure Do Love Their Lawn Mowin' T-Shirts
Irked by the loathsome "Zambrano mows my lawn" shirt found on one Cardinals fan a couple weeks ago, the Wrigley faithful come back with their own interpretation....

Adventures In Ill-Timed Column Topics
Chuck Woodling, Lawrence Journal World & News, May 16, 2009: "Wayman Tisdale always will be remembered as a bit player in one of the ugliest incidents in the history of Kansas University's Allen Fieldhouse." [LJWorld]...

Adam Burish Survives Horrifying Decapitation Attempt
The Blackhawks lost Game One of the Western Conference Finals yesterday, but Burish's head is still attached to the rest of his body so I guess he has that going for him. Teammate Ben Eager got tangled up with a Red Wing player in the second period and his foot—you know the one with the freshly shar...

Red Hawks. Black Wings. Open Thread.
Puckheads...enjoy. [Yahoo Sports]...

Jinxing Clayton Kershaw
Clayton Kershaw no-hitting Marlins... (UPDATE: oops.)[SI]...

Here's The Video From Corie Blount's Sentencing Hearing
Complete with the judge's "Cheech and Chong" line (starting at the 0:50 mark) that gave Chris McKendry quite the case of the giggle fits....

Rookie Millionaire Versus Obsessive Super Fan - Who Ya Got?
Last Wednesday, Marlins' rookie Chris Coghlan hit his first career homerun. He didn't anticipate trouble getting the ball back. Then again, he also didn't anticipate it being caught by professional ballhawk "THE HAPPY YOUNGSTER"!...

Delaware State Forfeits Conference Game So They Can Beat Michigan Instead
A scheduling conflict has forced Delaware State to choose between a home against North Carolina A&T or a road game at Michigan. Guess how that turned out....