aw Page 462 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Serena Williams Poses For Her Australian Open Glamour Shot
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

The Earplugs! They Do Nothing!
It's the 50 worst announcers in sports today, and I agree with every single name on the list except one. [Yahoo Sports]...

The Ludicrousness Of The Buzzsaw Bowl
So, here's a confession: About 11 years ago, I had a dream about Matt Leinart....

Tom Penders Accuses ESPN Of Video Witchcraft, Not Returning Calls
OK, you recall how Houston's Aubrey Coleman used Chase Budinger's face as a doormat on Sunday. Coleman was ejected and then suspended, but that's not the end of our story....

The Ballad Of Brenda And Kurtis The Stock Boy
Sports is a cold and cynical world, but its nice to know that uplifting tales of goodness can be found in the abyss. Oh, look... your mom just forwarded you an email from 1999!...

Serena Williams Must Not Be Allowed To Overheat
Here's a fun fact: when I look out my window I see snow, yet somehow at this very moment it's summer in Australia! How does that work?!...

That Doesn't Make Her Any Less Of A Lady
Andy Roddick on Serena Williams: "When we were ten, I had to literally run around in the shower to get wet. She was bench pressing dump trucks already at that time." [Yahoo Sports]...

Aubrey Coleman Steps on Chase Budinger's Face, Gets Ejected, Laughs
Houston was leading Arizona at the McKale Center by a score of 63-51 when Aubrey Coleman decided to stomp on Chase Budinger's face. As it turns out, that's just the wakeup call the Wildcats needed. ...

WaPo's Mike Wise Delivers Another Revealing Profile
"DeShawn Stevenson moved closer, toward the image of Darryl C. Stevenson. He looked for a resemblance, but the mug shot disappeared too quickly." [Washington Post]...

Today's Australian Open Action Nudity and Violence-Free
In a nice change of pace, today's Aussie Open produced no disturbing video images. Unless you happen to be Rafael Nadal or Andy Murray's opponent....

And Let's Get Bashed In The Face
Second part of the Deadspin Civil War Mayor's bet is complete. This was actually more painful than the tattoo....

The Buttsaw That Is The NFC Champion Arizona Cardinals
Well. That happened. If anything this exercise in permanent body desecration has taught me this: I will never, ever bet on the Philadelphia Eagles again....

Hope. Change. Buzzsaw Tattoos.
This is the Mighty Jim Cooke sketch of what will be placed on my upper right buttock very soon. No red birds, no shooting flames — just buzzsaw....

The Buzzsaw That Is The Super Bowl
It seems my beloved teams are making a habit out of this Ridiculous Postseason Run business. In retrospect, it was the only way it could have gone down....

Bill Self Explains Him...self
Kansas is "looking into" Bill Self's possibly illegal contact with star recruit John Wall, who probably won't go to Kansas anyway, because who wants to play for cheaters? [AP/Google]...

So That's What Happened To Brenda Warner
Some of you may be too young to remember the late '90s, but those who aren't may recall when the real star of Kurt Warner's rise to fame was his shrewishoutspoken wife, Brenda....

Bill Self Talks To Who He Wants To, When He Wants To
Every college basketball program cheats the NCAA regulations—that's been well established, right?—but some are a little more brazen about, if this alleged tale about Kansas coach Bill Self has any truth to it....

The Deadspin Civil War Mayor's Bet: Arizona Cardinals
So, the game is only four days away. It seems it's time to start getting a bit more serious about this....

Lawyers Do Radio Battle Over Eddy Curry's Alleged Homosexual Come-Ons
The limo driver's lawyer is confident: "What Dave did in this situation is say, 'Please stop, you're making me uncomfortable.' And Eddy kept saying, 'Yeah, yeah'. But he didn't stop, it persisted." [NYP]...

You've Got To Keep The Biscuit In The Basket
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....