aw Page 487 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Stanley Cup Finals Pants Party: Ducks Vs. Senators
We're taking Memorial Day off, as you've surely noticed — though we're excited LeBron and the Jazz have given us something to pay attention to — but we are doing one post: A preview of the Stanley Cup Finals. They drop the puck tonight at 8 p.m. ET, with the Anaheim (Not Mighty) Ducks against the Ot...
Welcome, Jezebel: Turn To The Worship Of Her God Baal
The classy, bombastic lovely ladies seen here are the editors of the newest site from our benevolent benefactors at Gawker Media, Jezebel, which launched today. The basic premise of the site is mapped out in a manifesto about the five biggest lies that women's magazines spew. Personally, we've alway...
AJ Hawk Has Brady Quinn's Back
Last week, we published some rather unusual photos of new Browns quarterback Brady Quinn and the wedding of his sister and Packers linebacker A.J. Hawk. Well, Hawk spoke this weekend about the photos and he isn't too happy....
Fortunately, Nobody Wants To Watch A Playoff Overtime
As MJD pointed out yesterday, NBC, amazingly, cut away from the Senators-Sabres Game 5 overtime yesterday to show ... the first two hours of the Preakness prerace coverage. That's right: Rather than show the most exciting part of an entire hockey season, NBC chose to show Bob Costas interview people...
Brady Quinn, Always With The Hetero Photos
Last March, Packers linebacker A.J. Hawk married Laura Quinn, whom you might remember as the double-jerseyed sister of new Browns quarterback Brady Quinn....
Pity The Poor Buffalo Fan
Heading into the NHL playoffs, the subplot we were most excited about involved the Buffalo Sabres, a team with a long-suffering but rabid — we mean literally rabid; it's in the Buffalo drinking water — fanbase and a No. 1 seed. After they beat the Rangers, it all appeared to be coming together. At l...
NHL Stanley Cup Pants Party: Sabres Vs. Senators
And here, you thought we were completely ignoring the NHL playoffs. To remind you: Canuck please!...
When Baseball Players Act Like They Want To Fight
In the wake of Roger Clemens' "Look at ME!" announcement yesterday, the fact that the Yankees and Mariners had a pseudo "lemme at 'em!" brawl was entirely lost. (Same thing with the Brewers-Prince Fielder skirmish.) But nothing beats a bench-clearing tussle, mainly because rarely are punches actuall...
Meet Hawaii's Stank Football Team
Colt Brennan, quarterback at the University of Hawaii, considered giving up his senior season at Hawaii in favor of the NFL Draft. But he opted to return, because he wants three things: a conference championship for the Warriors, a shot at the Heisman, and some goddamn soap....
ESPN Trots Out The Barbaro Crazies Again
We have enjoyed, in this week of Barbaro remembrance, the new focus on the kind, not-at-all-unbalanced souls who worship at the altar of the great lost champion, the ones we've been following with somewhat concerned fascination over the last year. Without fail, every reporter who talks to the Dee Mi...
Keyshawn's Final Moments As A Panther
If you want to relieve the sublime comedy of Keyshawn Johnson's "excitement" after learning that the Carolina Panthers drafted his "buddy" Dwayne Jarrett — thus securing his release from the team — the video above has the complete footage. It was funny at the time, but it improves considerably knowi...
If He's Half As Crazy As Joey Porter, The Steelers Drafted Well
With the 15th pick in the NFL Draft, the Pittsburgh Steelers select Lawrence Timmons, LB, Florida State. Mike Tanier of Football Outsiders tells you all about it....
Willis McGahee Is Easily Replaced
With the 12th pick of the NFL Draft, the Buffalo Bills select Marshawn Lynch, RB, Cal. Mike Tanier of Football Outsiders tells you all about it....
Lawrence Phillips Goes For Rare Triple Crown
An old George Carlin comedy routine had a good time mocking California's "Three Strikes And You're Out" policy of jailing three-time felons for life; Carlin pointed out that the writing of laws for the incarceration of our citizens should perhaps not be based in cute and funny baseball terms. But as...
Gene Upshaw Would Rather You Not Read Anyway
As anyone with even a fundamental understanding of professional sports labor issues knows, the NFL has the weakest players union. NFL players have the shortest careers, make the least money, suffer the harshest long term health effects and rarely have guaranteed contracts. This has caused many — and...
What? The NBA Can Discipline Officials? Really?
Man, when you offend Tim Duncan, you offend the whole NBA....
Cultural Oddsmaker: Who's the Next Minor League Mascot to Get All Dirty?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Your Long National Nightmare Is Over
Over the weekend, Pro Football Talk reported that everybody's favorite mathematician Joe Theismann was likely out as Monday Night Football "analyst," with his likely replacement being the infinitely superior Ron Jaworski. Today, The New York Times gets in on the act, confirming it with ESPN sources....
But Who Will Exchange Witty Banter With Jim Belushi?
You may have seen the last of Joe "Norman Einstein" Theismann in the Monday Night Football booth. Pro Football Talk is reporting that Theismann is out, and will be replaced by the great Ron Jaworski....
The Kansas/UCLA Open Thread
Kansas vs. UCLA will be tipping any time now. Hopefully, that one will make this one look like the JV game. There's no shortage of history and tradition there, of course, as will be mentioned during the obligatory shot of Bill Walton in the stands with his tiny Asian wife....