ball Page 544 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Holy Shit, Chris Davis Actually Got A Hit
A historic weight was lifted off of Chris Davis’s shoulders on Saturday. After 54 consecutive at bats without a hit—a streak that started in September of last season—Davis did the unthinkable and finally smacked one into the outfield for a single. The unfortunate soul who helped Davis break the stre...

Manny Machado Was Way Less Impressed With His Incredible Throw Than Adam Warren Was
That is Padres pitcher Adam Warren with quite a goofy grin on his face in the bottom of the eighth inning against the Diamondbacks on Friday. Why is he smiling from ear to ear? Because his teammate Manny Machado had just done this:...

Ex-NFL Players Now Have To Jump Through Even More Hoops To Collect Concussion Settlement Money
A new set of physicians’ rules has been approved for the NFL concussion settlement, and while those rules do not explicitly alter the criteria for a qualifying diagnosis, they do include a number of wholesale changes that could make it more difficult for ex-players to obtain settlement payments, jus...

Report: Lakers Dump Luke Walton
Magic Johnson didn’t want to be the one to do it, so he quit, but it was going to get done anyway, and now it’s official: The Lakers have canned head coach Luke Walton. ...

Uh-Oh, Joel Embiid's Knee Might Keep Him Out Of Game 1
A visibly frustrated Joel Embiid said he “has no idea” if he’ll play tomorrow in Game 1 of the Sixers’ first-round series versus the Nets, due to pain in his left knee. Seems bad:...

What Do The Sacramento Kings Want To Be?
Let’s start with this: the Sacramento Kings will never not be the Sacramento Kings. There will never be a time when this is not both painfully accurate, and just painful:...

The Braves Just Got Nine Years Of Ozzie Albies At An Insultingly Low Price
After signing Ronald Acuña to a team-friendly deal worth at most $12.4 million annually over the next decade, the Atlanta Braves have locked up another one of their young players with a dirt-cheap extension that’ll last beyond arbitration and through his entire 20s. Second baseman Ozzie Albies, curr...

A Lively Discussion About Futuristic Bathroom Technology
It is a sad fact of life: there are just more questions in the Funbag than there is time to answer them in the average Deadcast. All your horrible thoughts, your deeply considered curiosities about peeing and pooping, and NFL football, and peeing and pooping vis-a-vis Donald Trump—lost, like tears i...

Former Notre Dame Running Back Cierre Wood Charged With Murder In Connection With 5-Year-Old Girl's Death
Former Notre Dame and NFL running back Cierre Wood, 28, was arrested Wednesday and is facing charges of child abuse, child neglect, and murder, according to the Las Vegas Metro Police Department. ...

Don't Worry, The Sacramento Kings Are Still Dumb As Dogshit
The Sacramento Kings—the NBA’s most laughable franchise and, by ESPN’s estimation, the most miserable team in pro sports—finally had a good season. They didn’t make the playoffs, but they finished 39-43, a 12-win improvement over the previous season. De’Aaron Fox and Buddy Hield took big steps up, t...

The Terrible Private Highway Racket Is Coming For My House
You probably missed it because it falls squarely within the genre of normal, pre-2016 government malfeasance, but this week, according to the Washington Post, Maryland state Senator Nancy King (D) shot down a bill that would have made it more difficult for the state’s Republican governor to add toll...

Guy Who Publicly Threw Le'Veon Bell Under The Bus Wants Former Steelers To Stop Airing Dirty Laundry
It works in Ramon Foster’s favor that most offensive linemen aren’t well known and rarely grab attention, so when he issues a call for civility to former Steelers players like he did today, it’s seen as a sign of leadership and not a desperate measure by the worst union rep in the NFL....

The State Of The Warriors On The Edge Of Unrest
If, as has been predicted with almost frightening certitude by anyone who has watched a basketball game since Zelmo Beaty roamed the earth, the Golden State Warriors tromp through yet another field of challengers and re-re-almost-repeat as NBA champions, you outworlders will be pleased to know that ...

In His Fifth Appearance Of The Season, Trevor Rosenthal Finally Recorded An Out
If you haven’t spent all of your pity on walking tragedy Chris Davis, whose hitless streak reached 50 at-bats last night, spare some for Nationals reliever Trevor Rosenthal. After missing an entire season to Tommy John surgery and getting released by the Cardinals, Rosenthal landed in Washington thi...

Paul Pierce Is Getting Desperate
It’s been a rough time to be Paul Pierce as of late. Since boldly proclaiming that he was better than Dwyane Wade, he’s been the constant ridicule of seemingly anyone who could come up with a joke to make at his expense. Things started just moments after his claim when Jalen Rose read off a list of ...

Lawsuit Claims The AAF Intentionally Misled And Defrauded Its Players
In an unsurprising turn of events, two players who played for a league that was suddenly dissolved for comically greedy purposes are now suing that league for screwing them out of a job....

Las Vegas Aces Choose Jackie Young Over Asia Durr In WNBA Draft
For the third year in a row, the Las Vegas Aces franchise had the first pick in the WNBA draft, and after selecting first-year All-Star and Rookie of the Year A’Ja Wilson in 2018, the worst team in the West took Notre Dame guard Jackie Young with their first pick in 2019....

Dirk Nowitzki's Championship Stands Alone
Dirk Nowitzki is finally retiring after two decades with the Dallas Mavericks, and is secure in his legacy as the greatest-ever player from outside the United States thanks to 31,540 points scored, the iconic fadeaway jumper, his 14 all-star teams, and the 2007 MVP award. His once-reviled, or at lea...

Report: Guns, $20,000 In Cash Stolen From Braves Outfielder Nick Markakis's Home
A suspected burglar stole five guns, including an AR-15 rifle, and $20,000 in cash from the Atlanta home of Braves right fielder Nick Markakis, according to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. ...

Russell Wilson's Next Contract Should Be A Doozy
Russell Wilson is entering a contract year, and he’s going to get paid. At age 30, Wilson is in the prime of his career, and he continues to be exceptional—even as the Seahawks insist on letting Brian Schottenheimer design plays for him by repeatedly scrawling “MUST ESTABLISH RUN” on the wall of a ...