ball Page 707 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Shohei Ohtani Threw The Ball Hard As Fuck
Baseball prince Shohei Ohtani got knocked around in his last start against the Red Sox and had to leave the game after two innings due to a blister on his pitching hand. That was a bummer, mostly because blisters have a way of being incurable nuisances capable of undermining entire seasons. So when ...
<i>Varsity Blues </i>Can't Decide How It Feels About The Cult Of High School Football
Varsity Blues works as long as you don’t think about it too hard. Which, I readily admit, probably means it works exactly as well as intended....
Condoleezza Rice's Useless Commission On College Basketball Gives Useless Recommendations
Condoleezza Rice and her fellow members of the Commission on College Basketball stood on stage in Indianapolis Wednesday morning and announced to the world their plan to fix college basketball—aside from a few bright spots, it was a largely disappointing, half-hearted attempt at pushing back the ine...
Ronald Guzmán Does The Dang Splits
The impressive wingspan of Texas Rangers rookie Ronald Guzmán has earned him the nickname The Condor, which doesn’t exactly conjure up an image of flexibility or litheness, but the first baseman embodied just those qualities during tonight’s sixth inning with a picture-perfect split:...
Yoenis Céspedes Smacked This One To Mars
The Mets jumped out to a hot start to the year, but they didn’t have much help there from Yoenis Céspedes, who entered today hitting .195/.258/.354 after striking out in more than 40 percent of his plate appearances. But forget all that for now, and just enjoy this towering dinger that he delivered ...
Idiot On The Field In Yankee Stadium Gets Taken Out Near Second Base
An idiot on the field at Yankee Stadium got dropped by security like he was a running back in the Meadowlands during the seventh inning of tonight’s Twins-Yankees game. The broadcast cameras refused to show him (ugh), but two fan videos—and the brilliant photo seen above—captured most of the event....
Adrián Beltré Tried To Scam His Way From First To Third
It wasn’t quite as iconic as the absolutely perfect time he moved the on-deck circle last year. But Adrián Beltré continues to be the best in the world at turning otherwise mundane baseball plays into bursts of fun. In this case, it didn’t amount to anything tangible for his team, but you have to ad...
Jason Kelce Says An Eagles Fan Poured Their Grandfather's Ashes Into A Teammate's Hands
Eagles center Jason Kelce had a wild and memorable time at the team’s Super Bowl parade in February, but it seems that one of the more outlandish things that happened to him escaped the view of the cameras....
A Video Of Kevin Garnett Yelling A Bunch Got Thon Maker Inspired To Start Kicking Ass In The Playoffs <em></em>
Stringy Bucks big man Thon Maker has come up huge for the Bucks in their surprisingly competitive and entertaining first-round series against the Celtics. Maker averaged just 4.8 points, 3.0 boards, and 0.7 blocks a game in the regular season, and he basically didn’t play through the series’ first t...
Ex-NFL Cheerleaders Offer To Settle Discrimination Suit Against The NFL If Roger Goodell Agrees To Meeting
Last month, former Saints cheerleader Bailey Davis filed a discrimination complaint against the NFL after she was fired for posting an Instagram photo of herself in a bathing suit. The photo violated a Saints rule forbidding cheerleaders from “appearing nude, seminude or in lingerie,” which is an eq...
Do You Look At The Keyboard When You Type?<em></em>
Before we get into this week’s Funbag, I have a highly irritating announcement, which is that I’m gonna take a sabbatical in May. Actually, I was quietly suspended by corporate for pouring a bucket of live carpenter bees down Burneko’s chimney, but that’s neither here nor there. The point is that I’...
Of Course Giancarlo Stanton Can Still Bash Gargantuan Dongs
Giancarlo Stanton’s had a rough go of it so far in the Bronx, recording a pair of platinum sombreros and striking out 32 times in 92 plate appearances, enough to turn Yankee Stadium into hostile territory. But during the fifth inning of the Yankees’ 14-1 victory over the Twins Monday, Stanton showe...
College Athletes Are Doomed For As Long As These Clowns Keep Running The Show
A new report states that just one out of every four athletic directors are in favor of giving athletes the ability to make money off their name based off their athletic abilities....
The Rockets Fine-Tuned Their Equation And Became Invincible
The Houston Rockets led by one point, 50-49, at the end of the first half last night in Minnesota. So it’s not like they were in a crisis situation. But if a lead can be said to be an ugly and bad one, this qualified. ...
The Thunder Hit Rock Bottom, Where They Found A Gloating Mitt Romney
If you want a tangible explanation for why the Oklahoma City Thunder are down 3-1 in their playoff series against the Jazz and seem destined for a first-round exit, take your pick: Rudy Gobert has effectively canceled out Russell Westbrook’s ability to drive to the hoop; Russell Westbrook has no jum...
A Dumb, Specific Argument About Balks
It doesn’t take long at all for any debate about a balk to feel extremely stupid, or, at least, extremely tiring; this is due, in large part, to the fact that there’s no great shared understanding of what a balk is. Not among fans or broadcasters or even umpires, sure, but not quite among the league...
Engelb Vielma Tracker: Engelb Vielma Back To Triple-A, Plus Hot Fresh Anagrams
Today’s edition of the Engelb Vielma Tracker must open with an apology: We recognize that this update is tardy, and for that, we are deeply sorry. ...
Annoyingly Coy Report: Eagles Owner Jeffrey Lurie Called Donald Trump's Presidency "Disastrous"
Buried near the end of this New York Times article about the Super Bowl champion Philadelphia Eagles talking to the White House about planning a visit is a tidbit about team owner Jeffrey Lurie “using a vulgarity” to call Donald Trump’s presidency “disastrous.” That quote seems like it’d be more imp...
Treat Yourself To Bartolo Colon's "Batters Faced" Page On Baseball Reference
If he hadn’t out-pitched Justin Verlander and completely baffled the defending world champions for seven innings on Sunday Night Baseball last week, there is a decent chance that Bartolo Colon might not have started another game for the Texas Rangers. The pitcher whose spot Colon filled last Sunday ...
Report: Sports Anchor Booted From Warriors-Spurs Series After He Stole Steph Curry's Bodyguard's Jacket
Bay Area ABC7 sports anchor Mike Shumann was sent home from San Antonio and kept off the air for Sunday’s Warriors-Spurs game after he was caught stealing the jacket of the Golden State Warriors’ director of team security, according to The Athletic....