ball Page 782 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ah Yes, These Are The Orlando Magic I Remember
I am very glad I didn’t say anything especially glowing about the Orlando Magic back on November 2, when they were “good,” before they remembered that they cannot truly be good, for they are the Orlando Magic. They almost fooled me!...
We Have A Contender For Worst Play Of The Season
Son, we recruited you to Western Kentucky to do one thing: punt the football. And you’ve done a hell of a job of punting that football this season. But what you did right here tonight, well, you did everything that wasn’t punting a football....
Arkansas Fires Bret Bielema Immediately After Loss To Mizzou
Arkansas closed out a disappointing 4-8 season with a crushing 48-45 loss to Missouri tonight, and right after the game ended, they announced the long-anticipated firing of coach Bret Bielema. Arkansas had a two-touchdown lead in the first quarter, but they lost on a 19-yard field goal after a very ...
Miami's Return To Greatness Stalls With Upset Loss To Pitt
“The ‘Canes are back, baby!” many an optimistic Miami fan has hollered this season, unchastened by the countless times over the years they’ve chanted this refrain without it actually coming true, and unconcerned about the fact that few non-Floridians under the age of 30 have any first-hand knowledge...
Baylor, TCU Team Up To Demonstrate Christian Values This Holiday Weekend
The first Thanksgiving in 1621 was held by religious fanatics to properly express gratitude to their God for a bountiful harvest. 396 years later, the holiday is recognized by football teams getting in fights with each other....
Report: Derrick Rose Has Left The Cavs And May Not Return
According to a report from ESPN, Cavaliers point guard Derrick Rose has taken a leave of absence from the team in order to re-evaluate his NBA future....
Washington's Shitty Turf Is Hurting The Team Again
It’s been almost four years since Washington’s slap-dick field cost them Robert Griffin III’s knee, and possibly career. Somehow, they are still letting things like happen:...
Tennessee WR Jauan Jennings Dismissed After Ranting About Team's "Lying-Ass Coaches"
Tennessee receiver Jauan Jennings was kicked off the team earlier this week after he went on a expletive-laden rant against the school’s coaching staff. Jennings has missed almost the entire season with a wrist injury, although according to him, he was close to returning for the Volunteers’ game aga...
It's Conspiracy Theory Time For Cowboys Fans
The best part about a sports team you don’t care about massively underachieving is witnessing the accompanying freakout from people who very much do care about the team. The Cowboys looked pitiful in yesterday’s loss to the Chargers, and now a team that was supposed to be a Super Bowl contender comi...
Nick Fitzgerald Leaves Egg Bowl With Horrible, Horrible, Horrible Injury
Tonight’s Egg Bowl between Ole Miss and Mississippi State started off ugly and got literally ugly as Bulldogs quarterback Nick Fitzgerald left the game on a cart after suffering a truly horrifying leg injury that left ESPN’s broadcast scrambling to cut away. ...
A Thanksgiving Tribute To My Chair<em></em>
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
Report: NFL May Go Back To Keeping Players In Locker Room During Anthem
NFL owners might have decided last month not to make any changes to the league’s national anthem policy, which meant there would be no punishments for players who are using the anthem as a platform to protest racial inequality. But that doesn’t mean things won’t be changing next year....
Fearing NCAA Penalties, Louisville Permanently Benches Brian Bowen
After several weeks of no-comments, deflections, and avowals that they were Focusing On The Upcoming Season, Louisville announced Wednesday that five-star forward Brian Bowen will not be allowed to practice or play for the Cardinals this year. The standout freshman will remain on scholarship, and Lo...
I Saw The Buttfumble Live And It Fractured My Family<em></em>
Sometime in the winter of 2010, my dad sat my younger brother and me down for a talk....
Mike Leach Has Some Wedding Advice For All You Men Out There
A reporter who is getting married in a few days asked Washington State head coach Mike Leach if he had any wedding advice to share with him, and this is what he got:...
Tyrod Taylor Is The Bills' Starter Again, Because Why Not?
After taking a few days to digest Nathan Peterman’s fart cloud of a debut, Bills head coach Sean McDermott told reporters this morning that maybe it would be best if Tyrod Taylor started at quarterback on Sunday at the Chiefs....
Hell Yeah, Here Comes Otani
According to reports, the MLB players’ union has signed off on a new posting system that was agreed to by Nippon Professional Baseball and MLB. This means that Shohei Otani—the most interesting man in baseball, a legitimate five-tool star and an ace pitcher whose fastball has been clocked up to 103 ...
Jerry Jones Won't Sue The NFL, Still Won't Shut Up About Roger Goodell's Contract
Another thrilling update in this saga of powerful old football men sending mean letters back and forth! Jerry Jones has announced that he will not be suing the NFL to block commissioner Roger Goodell’s contract extension, as he’d previously threatened to do. But that doesn’t mean he’s given up putti...
Lane Kiffin Has A Video Of Nick Saban Dancing At Karaoke And Selfishly Hasn't Shared It
There are several interesting tidbits in ESPN’s profile of Lane Kiffin today, but the best ones are those on Kiffin’s relationship with former boss Nick Saban. There’s this one, about Kiffin continuing to text the Alabama coach even though he knows he’s not ever going to get any response: ...
Some People Banned From Baseball For More Interesting Misdeeds Than John Coppolella
Former Atlanta Braves general manager John Coppolella has received a lifetime ban from baseball for violating international signing rules by paying prospects too much money under the table. This makes him the fourth living person currently on the commissioner’s permanently ineligible list, joining P...