bo Page 671 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Might Be The Most Useless NFL Column Ever Written
Gary Myers of the New York Daily News: Stop. This is an actual paragraph you wrote in a newspaper with a circulation of nearly 800,000:...

The Quasimodo Of Fenway: A Creation Of The Devil, Keeper Of The Monster, Sad About The Red Sox
He keeps his watch at night, working the ancient machinery that signals to the public the fortunes of the times. Some call him a monster, but it is within the Monster he hides from the visitors who curse him for the bad news he brings evening after evening. Some say he has gone deaf from the vitrio...

Cody Ross Went Completely Apoplectic Over A Called Third Strike
I really don't think there's any universe where a baseball player would actually swing and strike an umpire upside the head with a baseball bat. (Delmon Young, by far, has come the closest.) However, when you're reacting in anger to a called third strike and you're still holding a bat in your hands,...

You Can Actually Pinpoint The Second When Dustin Pedroia Learns His Wife Is In Labor
Dustin Pedroia missed the 2009 All-Star Game to be with his wife, who was about to give birth to their first child. Tonight, Bobby Valentine had to abruptly pull Pedroia from the game, telling him mid-inning that Kelli had gone into labor and that he had to vamoose immediately. Alas, shortly thereaf...

This Is The 53-Year-Old Man Who Pushed A Teen Off His Lawnmower, Tebowed, Then Drove Off
Consider this your update, hopefully the last one, on the story that captivated a nation. Police had described the suspect as bald with glasses, and, yep, I'd say David McCosby fits the bill....
![Tuesday Night Fights: The Iron Sheik Watches Lady Park Brawlers Who "Look Like Dog Shit Inside The Joan Rivers Ass" [<em>Sic</em>]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Tuesday Night Fights: The Iron Sheik Watches Lady Park Brawlers Who "Look Like Dog Shit Inside The Joan Rivers Ass" [<em>Sic</em>]
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: "The Rock in Bakersfield (Fight at 6 Street Park)." Tonight's commentator: The Iron Sheik, former tag-team partner of Volkoff, greatest Iranian of all time, Twitter wo...

This R2D2 Keg Is The Droid You've Been Looking For Your Entire Life
Meet R2DKEG, the most popular drug-dispensing robot at the LSU tailgate (because C-3PBLOW will not fucking shut up)....

The NFL Lawsuit That Could Be Bigger Than The Bounty Scandal
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Chris Berman's Comb-Over Has Reached Ernie McCracken Levels
Chris Berman's much-ballyhooed turn at the mic to call a live Monday Night Football game came and went last night, and without much drama. He was better than last year's Mike & Mike experiment, at least, though his reliance on baseball terminology to call a football game was disconcerting and event...

Aaron Rodgers Must Wear 49ers Jersey Because Of Bet With Boyz II Men
We blipped about this Sunday and it bears repeating: Aaron Rodgers is friends with Boyz II Men. Such good friends in fact, that he entered into a friendly (see?) wager with the balladeers concerning the outcome when the Packers visit played host to San Francisco. Packers win, Boyz II Men's Nathan M...

Counterpoint: The Jets Brought The House Down
Let's get the ugly stuff out of the way first. I am a Jets fan. That makes me both very biased and not very bright. Now that that's settled, I would like to take umbrage with this, because it has been lodged in my craw all afternoon. Please note that this is not part of the the very excellent NFL R...

There Was At Least One Sign Depicting Roger Goodell As Hitler At The Superdome Yesterday
Roger Goodell temporarily may have lost his battle to suspend the Bounty Four, but he's still winning in his fight to become New Orleans's most hated man since Mike Brown. Here he is, helpfully adorned, on at least one placard. (We don't know if there were several of these things at the game Sunday....

Rob Ryan Used To Eat Entire Pizzas In His Van And Spend $70 On Chocolate And Skittles
Jets head coach Rex Ryan and Cowboys defensive coordinator Rob Ryan are twins. Rex Ryan got lap-band surgery two years back, so Rob got it earlier this year. Rex has lost over 100 pounds. Rob's down 55 and counting....

Jets And Bills Fans Greet The Season By Brawling In The Stands
Fans of the old AFC East rivals chose to renew their own rivalry in the upper reaches of MetLife Stadium on Sunday, and the rout was on around the 32-second mark, when the meathead in the black tanktop took a swipe at the (male? female?) Bills fan who appeared to be arguing with someone else....

Maybe The Jets Really Are Not Planning On Using Tim Tebow At Quarterback
As much as the Jets insisted throughout training camp and the pre-season that there was no quarterback controversy ("Mark is our starting quarterback") is it possible they were telling the truth? Did the Jets decide sometime a few weeks ago that Tim Tebow was actually going to be exclusively a runni...

Sanchize Vs. Teambow: Your NFL Early Games Viewing Guide
It's finally here. Sunday football. Wednesday was cool and all, but this is the day that really counts. For the remainder of the day you will watch football and only football and it will be awesome. Until your team, obviously playing a 1 P.M. game, loses and ruins the entire day for you. But you've...

Mary Lou Retton, Vanilla Ice, and William Hung Talk Tebow On NFL Network Because The World Is Officially Ending
Hey guess what everyone? The NFL network has helpfully offered you a segment where Vanilla Ice offers words of wisdom to Tim Tebow for sustained professional success. I want to kill myself....

Weekend Read: D Magazine on Young Tony Romo
Tony Romo, who is 32 and in his prime as an NFL quarterback, comes from an altogether different era. That's all I can draw from the current issue of D Magazine, in which Peter Simek drills down into a single high-school game to explain Romo's ascent from small-town jock-of-all-trades to a guy with t...

