bo Page 827 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Pretty Boy/Pac-Man Doping Mindgames Go Both Ways
Pacquiao's camp proposed a $10 million payment if either fighter flunks a drug test; Mayweather's people refused. At this point, they can both take horse Viagra for all I care, as long as they shut up and fight. [Examiner]...

The Dog Ate Rick Reilly's Compendium Of Column Ideas
Remember when Rick Reilly punched up an old Sports Illustrated column and filed it fresh for ESPN? Don Ohlmeyer, the Worldwide Leader's ombudsman, sure does, and he's here to console everyone. It was all just a big misunderstanding....

John Lackey's Wife Gets Her First, Uh... Taste Of Boston Nightlife
Krista Lackey has already scored her first mention in the Boston gossip pages after being spotted at a fancy restaurant—where one of Southie's finest puked on her fur coat. Pissah. [Boston Herald, via 3:10toJoba]...

Mayweather Laughably Implies Pacquiao Is Doping
The press releases we get are usually worthless, but sometimes they are news in themselves. Like this one we just got, in which Floyd Mayweather's camp not-so-subtly accuses Pac-Man of ingesting something stronger than power pellets....

Fox Robot Makes Perfect Stocking Stuffer For People You Hate
Someone is actually selling 10" action figures of Cleatus, the audience-enraging Fox football robot. Unless it's a voodoo doll I can stuff with dynamite to put us all out of our misery, I'm not interested. [Foamheads]...

Lowell's Bum Thumb Gives Thumbs Down To Texas Deal
Eleven days later, the deal's off. The upside of re-signing him after the 2007 season: keeping a World Series winning team together. The downside: it's Mike Lowell, and he was all but guaranteed to be physically untradeable. [Boston Herald]...

The Time Of Year When It's Okay To Bribe Student Athletes
Bowl season is upon us, with yesterday's New Mexico Bowl and St. Petersburg Bowl presented by Beef 'O' Brady's respectively. But these meaningless games are less interesting than the payment gift bags given to the players involved....

NFL Network Can Suffer A Rancid Amputation – Your Christmasaroo
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

3-D Broadcast Fails To Win Over Crowd At Actual 3-D Game
Yesterday, in a stupendous moment of technological flimflammery, the infamously large HDTV that hangs over the field at Cowboys Stadium broadcast stunning 3-D images to the crowd....of the live three-dimensional football game taking place directly below it....

Late Game Open Thread: A Whole Lot Of Yuck
Team That Makes Old Ladies Sad v. Team Run By A Sad Old Lady; Rejuvenated Vince Young v. Reanimated Kyle Boller; Holding Romos v. Litigious Merrimans, etc. #nflforums [NFL.com]...

Boston's "Santa Speedo Run" Brings Out All Sorts Of People
And not just ones who like to celebrate Christmas by showing off how a corporate membership at the Boston Sports Club has sculpted their bodies. No, it also brings out the lurking perverts. (Not Jay Mariotti.) [Boston.com]...

Madness Is...A 49ers Taquería Mural
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Just Because He Tapes His Penis To His Thigh Is No Reason To Judge
"After David Akers nails 55 YD FG in practice, Jon Dorenbos exhalts in celebration, screaming, 'Einhorn's a man!'" [Via]...

Excavating Bill Simmons: NY Mag Writers Take On That Big Ol' Book Of Basketball
Jonathan Lethem; Sam Anderson; Sherman Alexie; Bethlehem Shoals. Oh, and Tommy Craggs, who takes off his angry pants for a little bit but manages to somehow squeeze in a reference to Astral Weeks. [NYmag]...

The Five Stages Of Football Grief. Jamboroo, Week 14
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

BREAKING: Barry Bonds Doesn't Play Baseball Anymore
A shocking Deadspin investigation has revealed that despite frequent mentions in the national media and his ubiquitous presence in any discussion about baseball and its steroid policies, Barry Bonds is not actually a Major League Baseball player anymore....

Tiger Now Crushing Children's Dreams
A Wisconsin middle school band had hoped to fund their trip to Disney World by auctioning off an athlete's autographed photo. That athlete? Tiger Woods. That auction? Last weekend. Shit....

Bowden Announces New Endeavor: Holding A Grudge
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Third Generation Bonds Gets A Hit, And Rob Neyer Turns It Into A Hit Piece
Nikolai Bonds was an omnipresent cheerleader during his father's quest for history. Now he's 19 and arrested for assaulting his mother. They grow up so fast....

The Analysis The NBA Wants You To Read
The TrueHoopheads have gone through Tim Donaghy's book and done the yeoman's work of checking some of his claims against box scores, play-by-plays and betting lines. They've found a few implausibilities. Go read. [TrueHoop, also]...