bo Page 933 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Cleveland, You Have A Lot Of 'Splainin' To Do
What they're saying in parents' basements everywhere about Boston's 11-2 win over Cleveland in the deciding game of the American League Championship Series ......

Ready Or Not, Here Come The Red Sox
Say what you will about the sometimes unhealthy hold that the Boston Red Sox have on their fans ... but the picture above looks really, really fun....

About Last Night
What you missed while hiding from assassination hit squad monkey gangs ... • MLB: Red Sox win AL pennant, Manny says "Wait 'till next year." Boston 11, Cleveland 2. • NFL: Jason strikes when you least expect it; he cannot be killed. Broncos 31, Steelers 28. • We don't care what you say; they'll alwa...

Your American League Champion Boston Red Sox
No longer are the Red Sox the team overcoming decades of futility to emerge victorious. Instead, they are a increasingly dominant franchise going to the World Series for the second time in four years. It might not be the rapturous breakthough of 2004 ... and, of course, we're sure Red Sox fans woul...

The Team Wearing Red Should Win Tonight
Since this morning's revelation, Indians' pitcher Paul Byrd has defended his HGH purchases, asserting it was for a tumor on his pituitary gland. Oh sure, Byrdo, that's what all the veteran control pitchers say. Blame it on a tumor. Did Jon Lester blame it on a tumor? Hell no!...

Who Knew Large Humans Could Get Winded Easily?
• Sure enough, the Dallas-Minnesota game is the nuttiest of the 4 o'clock bunch. After Vikings' defensive tackle Kevin Williams ran back Tony Romo's fumble about 80 or 90 yards into the end zone, you could see the trainer come out and squirt a water bottle on the back of his neck, because that's exa...

J.D. Is No Longer A Scrub
Despite the NFL's best efforts — and because Roger Goodell has yet to ban it — the blogodecagon is still abuzz over last night's Red Sox 12-2 win in Game 6 of the ALCS. Let's see what all the fuss is about....

In The Words Of Boston's Generation, "UP... YOURS!"
"J.D. Drew hit a grand slam." That line speaks such volumes of how off Fausto Carmona was last night, that it usually saves sports columnists 600 words and gets people home earlier to spend quality time with the family. J.D. Drew had been making beat writers work overtime all season, now he's finall...

About Last Night...
What you missed while trying to win that lifetime of free beer prize ... • MLB: Oh yeah? More like Lost-o Carmona! Guffaw! • College Football: I'd say that Auburn ought to do more thinking and Les Miles. • Hey look, Boston! Gagne comes through in extras! Oh ... the hockey one....

The Only Way A Sock Will Factor Into Game 6
As you might hear about 100,000,000 million times on the television tonight, Game 6 of the 2004 ALCS was Schilling's "bloody sock" game. And wouldn't you know, he's starting this year's Game 6 as well tonight, against the Lord of the Flies, Fausto Carmona....

Steinbrenner and Isiah Share A Secret Gay Lover (Allegedly)
I was about to go on this long rant about how ESPN keeps discussing the New York Yankees throughout the ALCS, but as soon as I saw the latest Jonathan Lee Riches lawsuit on The Smoking Gun, I quickly retracted my sentiments. Riches, who you may remember from such frivolous lawsuits as "Bill Belichic...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while dodging falling, flaming squirrels... • MLB: Joe Torre won't be managing the Royals, who hire Trey Hillman. • College Football: UConn, yes you, takes down Louisville, 21-17. • NHL: Coats blank Swords....

Two Pair Not A Winning Hand In Kansas
Oh yes we've got trouble! Right here in Salina Kansas! With a capital T and that rhymes with B and that stands for boobs! Here are Salina Central High seniors Jessica Sheahon and Haley Wenthe, modeling salacious T-shirt designs which have been banned from their high school campus. The entire notion ...

Jerry Jones Can't Figure Out This Damn Spacebar
Via Touchdown.org comes one of the more amusing attempts by a professional sports franchise to master the series of tubes that is the Internets....

He's Josh Beckett And You're Not
What they're saying this fine morning about Boston's 7-1 win over Cleveland in the American League Championship Series ......

At Least Two More Days Of Life In The ALCS
We find it telling that, the day after Josh Beckett once again saved the proverbial Red Sox hide, everyone was still talking about Manny Ramirez. It's amusing to watch reaction to Manny; people treat him like he's a normal human being rather than, you know, an alien. The trick is not to be mad that...

About Last Night
What you missed while fumigating your nuts ... • MLB: Despite Manny calling time out when his team didn't have any left, Red Sox stay alive in ALCS. • College football: You've got some red on you ... Rutgers 30, South Florida 27. • Soccer: David Beckham upstaged by the offensive stylings of Jozy Alt...

This Ain't Over
Don't be confused everyone, it's me, Unsilent Majority. I'm filling in tonight because Will was delayed in his travels or he just doesn't love you anymore...the text message wasn't entirely clear on that matter....

It Could Be A Late Night In Cleveland
The Indians might be trying to distract the Red Sox with ghosts of "relationships" past, but tonight, the National Anthem is the last thing on the minds of Indians fans. They're one game from their first World Series in a decade and going for their first title since 1948....