br Page 391 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Christian Pulisic Finally Played And Scored The Type Of Goal That Made Him Worth $73 Million
Christian Pulisic hasn’t been having the best time in this, his final season at Germany’s Borussia Dortmund before his record-breaking transfer to Chelsea becomes official. He had only made two substitute appearances for the Black and Yellow since the transfer was announced, and though he did get a ...

Gymnastics Doesn't Need A Safety Valve
This weekend, UCLA women’s gymnastics defeated their Pac-12 rival Oregon State in Corvallis, which was hardly an unexpected result given that the Bruins were ranked third heading into the competition and the Beavers were 20th. En route to this victory, the Bruins scored 197.9, a season high for them...

LaVar Ball Emerges From The Woods, Says Lonzo Needs To Be Traded To The Suns<em></em>
The most hotly discussed deal of the NBA’s trade deadline season is a proposed blockbuster deal in which the Lakers would send all their young players and a handful of their old players and whatever other crap is necessary to New Orleans in exchange for Anthony Davis. The exact parameters of such a ...

The Carolina Hurricanes Are Officially Good Enough To Get Mad About
The Carolina Hurricanes, who have not been good in a very long time, are actually pretty cool to watch this year, even if they haven’t quite crossed back into the realm of “good” yet. Of the teams currently outside the playoff picture (the Canes are 10th in the East right now), Carolina is undeniabl...

Tom Brady Got <i>Thiiiiiis</i> Close To Kissing Bob Kraft On The Lips
The Patriots won the Super Bowl again (hooray, whatever). As the celebrations for the lowest-scoring title game in this era of the league’s history began, an inescapable scrum of photographers, security personnel, and CBS’s Tracy Wolfson immediately began to surround Tom Brady as he celebrated with ...

At Least It Can Only Get Better From Here, Right?
Well that was horrendously boring....

Report: The Patriots Blame Tom Brady's Quack Trainer For Gronk's Injuries
Rob Gronkowski is hobbled and washed, and Patriots brass at least in part blames Alex Guerrero, Tom Brady’s quack/body advisor. That’s according to a report by the NFL Network’s Michael Giardi:...

The Lakers' MUD Squad Is Sliding Downhill Fast
The entire NBA needs a nap right now, and tensions must be especially high in LA with every player on the roster not named LeBron James or the untouchable Kentavious Caldwell-Pope on the trading block. The Lakers roster outside of LeBron broadly consists of young guys best known for fucking up on th...

The Penguins-Panthers Trade Makes Sense For Everyone
Everyone look away from basketball for a second, we have a hockey trade!...

Not Even The Lawyers Can Agree On What's Going On With The NFL Concussion Settlement
A judge’s order that called for a clarification of the physicians’ rules for the NFL concussion settlement will not affect the standard those physicians must use to issue a qualifying diagnosis, thus ostensibly making it easier for former players to qualify for settlement money, according to a lawye...

The Stove Is So Cold That Now We Have To Entertain The Padres
Baseball’s hot stove should have burned bright and hot and then shut off by this point in the offseason, given that there are less than two weeks to go until spring training. Instead, the free agent process is all but guaranteed to trudge on through February, as solid potential additions including D...

Dean Ambrose Is Leaving WWE And Contract Season Just Got Much More Interesting
The biggest news in pro wrestling this week probably should have involved in-ring, canonical storyline fallout from WWE’s Royal Rumble weekend in Phoenix. And there was indeed news made there, or at least the set up for the next round between Ronda Rousey and Becky Lynch, which will likely be pushed...

Isn't The Super Bowl Supposed To Be Fun?
The Patriots are, in all likelihood, going to win again, and it’s going to be awful. The question now is: What is the worst possible way they could win? A 52-6 blowout? A three-TD lead for L.A. followed by yet another miraculous comeback by everyone’s least-favorite fancy dog? Aaron Donald breaking ...

Here Is A Delightful Anecdote From Cameron Jordan About The Browns Being Incompetent
Now, everyone knows that former Cal defensive lineman Cameron Jordan was selected with the 24th overall pick in the 2011 NFL Draft. What the Tom Heckert/Pat Shurmur–era Browns presupposed at the time was....maybe he wasn’t?...

The Skins Heard You Love Rob Ryan So They Put A Rob Ryan In Your Rob Ryan
Earlier today, Washington’s football team named Rob Ryan its inside linebackers coach. Linebacking is a skill that cannot be coached by just one man! They announced the hiring of the longtime NFL defensive coordinator with a press release and a tweet. The latter is what I’m interested in here....

D'Angelo Russell And The Brooklyn Nets Are Actually Good Now
Quick: what’s the biggest joke of the decade in the NBA? If you answered, “the New York Knicks,” fine, I’ll give you that. But most people would answer, “that damn Brooklyn Nets-Boston Celtics trade,” and most people would be correct....

An Interview With The Local TV Producer Fired For A Graphic Calling Tom Brady A "Known Cheater"
Michael Telek is a 27-year-old news producer who, until yesterday, worked for the CBS affiliate KDKA in Pittsburgh. He was fired after a Super Bowl news segment used a chyron that labeled Tom Brady as a “known cheater.” As was obvious to pretty much everyone, the graphic was a joke—and not inaccurat...

Humorless Pittsburgh News Station Fires Employee For Graphic Calling Tom Brady A "Known Cheater"
A Pittsburgh TV station has fired an employee who used a chyron calling Tom Brady a “known cheater” into a broadcast on Monday, SI.com reported. ...

<i>SportsCenter</i> Falls For Fake Instagram Screenshot Showing LeBron James Once Again Tampering With Anthony Davis
Hey, remember when ESPN trumped up a ho-hum quote by LeBron James about how cool it would be to play with one of the greatest players of this generation, and spun out a whole stupid news cycle from it, and got the NBA to send out a memo warning teams against players speaking aloud in a way that sugg...
